Hmm...that must be why this hole is a par 5

(W3stwing, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 5:42, archived)

Hahaha
He looks quite cross at having a golf ball on his head!
( Uncle Joe, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 6:50, archived)

saw on t'elly
a golfer his his second shot on a par 4 and the ball went flying up in the air and down straight into the hole, no bounce, nothing, it just vanished down and jammed against the flag.
( Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 7:05, archived)

I believe that is technically known as
"a flying fuck"

But I could be wrong. Morning all. I am unaffected by the tube strike!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

Have it, city workers.
( brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 7:25, archived)

no firestarting remember
People are actually being encouraged to not go to the toilet and store up their piss in their bladders, just in case of a dire emergency.
( Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 7:31, archived)

I actually have
a special gland situated next to my left eye which has the capacity to fire up to 12 gallons of water per second, accurate within 100 feet.

As it is, I just saw a fire engine razzing down the high street. I don't know if they know that they're meant to be on holiday today or not. Did I say holiday?

(in real life I actually support the blighter's request for extra wad).
( brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Wed 13 Nov 2002, 8:23, archived)