The perfect excuse...
Works every time...

(Spin Doctor, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:41, archived)

The now legendary Hedley
was late once and when I asked him why he said "Coz my goldfish were on fire."
( Hugo Rune, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:43, archived)

I'd respect that in an excuse
an utter disregard for the truth, most pleasing.
( Pootle where's his tart on his sleve?, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:45, archived)

my girlfriend
was at a lecture, some girl walked in late and was asked why, the reply was "i was in prison"
( aubergene, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:48, archived)

A woman's varicose vein exploding on the bus was my best
(and true) excuse.
( pep, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:51, archived)

what about the time
you found a dying crack whore on your doorstep? That must be a contender.
( Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:53, archived)

Didn't pep
just step over her though? Wouldn't have made her late.
( Wifey, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:55, archived)

ah yes,
good point, good point.
( Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:56, archived)

I totally forgot about that.
Nahh, I nicked her money and kicked her to the kerb.
then roller her back, gave the money back, called the ambulance and got scared shitless when she woke up
( pep, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:02, archived)

eugh.

( Amerella, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:53, archived)

Yeuch
that's really horrid..
My best was the time I was late for work 'cause me and my mate got drunk and ended up on an oil tanker. We had problems getting a taxi to get us home from there...
( Wifey, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:54, archived)

that's quite impressive
you're a bit of a dark horse you, what with your American Servicemen and the like... hmmm....
( pep, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:04, archived)

The tanker was in dry dock
but it was a very funny night. I shall tell you about it sometime.. ;0)
( Wifey, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:11, archived)

oooh, intruiged now
can't wait!
( pep, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:17, archived)

we're you wearing the contents....
for added authenticity when you finally arrived?
( monkeymanblue mathematically safe, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:58, archived)

where are the apostrophe police?
you'd surely be nicked for that.
( beardman, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:02, archived)

i'd change it...
but your message would then look silly!
( monkeymanblue mathematically safe, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:11, archived)

I once
turned up for a lecture covered in my own blood following a particularly nasty cycling accident.
( HP SPEEDCORE!, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:00, archived)

wierdly
my parents got a letter from their gardener yesterday, saying they need to find someone else for a few months.

Postmarked Lewes Prison.

Didn't bother to mention what he's in for, though.
( isthisyou?, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:08, archived)

"Mummeh! The Gardener's gorn to Prison!"
"Damn! One simply can't get the Staff these days..."
( Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:11, archived)

i knew you were going to say that,
Philomena
( isthisyou?, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 15:15, archived)

"I'm Nude"
would be a better excuse. WYH BTW.
( sick_boy, Fri 6 Dec 2002, 14:46, archived)