From the Sick Christmas Cards challenge. See all 300 entries (closed)

( Puromycin will be scraping his "special" underpants on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:22, archived)

Oh jeez, don't...
This could so easily happen.

*soils self*
(scratchresistor is your mum..., Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:25, archived)

hahah wooo
I've just sent a court order for bailiffs to go collect money of a twunt who lied to us and stole £1000 of my cash.
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:26, archived)

Go get him CW....
Twist his Spuds Off!
( Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:27, archived)

It wasn't me,
was it?
(scratchresistor is your mum..., Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:28, archived)

Unless your name is Adam Jones
then no. you're safe!

3
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:37, archived)

too right christmas or not
get whats owed..
(b3tan senseless is slowly getting older, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:29, archived)

Can you get money
just for lying? That sounds like a great job!

Oh, hold on. That's estate agents. I think I'll pass.
( wheelybird grep | grep | grep, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:31, archived)

or recruitment consultants.
but they call it commission.
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:36, archived)

the fucking cunts!
/recruitment twats hate blog
( gravytrain, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:38, archived)

YAY
go get them.
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:31, archived)

either way he's going to have a CCJ and bailiffs as his crimbo pressie
MUAHAHAHA what a wank stain

4
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:37, archived)

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
good for you :)
( HappyToast B3ta Art Auction http://b3ta.com/links/749374, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:33, archived)

have fun!
how did he steal it?
( Milkman Dan, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:34, archived)

he told everyone he had cancer and that he needed the money
to pay off debts so he could get into private healthcare...

or words to that effect. I lent him a grand, he did a runner, turns out he didn't have cancer.

he was a friend and a colleague. emphasis on WAS

edit: 5
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:36, archived)

FUCK!
I've never wished cancer on someone before but...
( riverghost bringing you bollock moustaches since, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:37, archived)

He's only 18 as well
he's fucked himself in the ass!

2
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:38, archived)

Well
It does say what an amazing kind and compassionate person you are!

EDIT: For some reason I think I've heard of that before. The person was jailed for fraud. Have you notified the police?
( riverghost bringing you bollock moustaches since, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:39, archived)

yes they said it was a civil matter
I lent him that grand because I felt he really needed the help...

My office called the police and set up the claim, I do feel pretty harsh, but I was struggling for money, I didn't have much I lent him all I had spare.
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:42, archived)

Well I hope his botty gets gangreen and falls off!

( riverghost bringing you bollock moustaches since, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:44, archived)

What a Knob...
That's lower than an Estate Agent underneath a rat in the lowest Circle of Hell sucking on Satan's Balls...
( Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:37, archived)

that's so shitty
good luck with that
( Milkman Dan, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:39, archived)

Do you not feel a bit gullible now?
But then, I hate all of my colleagues. They smell of goat poo.
( wheelybird grep | grep | grep, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:40, archived)

no
simply because I would have done it for any of my friends, if he had been genuine I would have been doing him a massive favour.

it was still worth the initial thought and care. but not worth the upset it caused afterwards
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:48, archived)

I have an itchy foot
and no debts to speak of. Can I borrow £13,000 please?
( wheelybird grep | grep | grep, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:58, archived)

ooosh
whatta cunt.
( A dirty cunt shrivelled balls, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:44, archived)

How did you get my address?!
:P
( riverghost bringing you bollock moustaches since, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:35, archived)

Bailiff? Waste of money!
Good luck then, it's NEVER worked for me, the scrotes just deny access and then have nowt worth taking anyway.
The best method of collection so far, is for me and "Mr Browning" to pay a visit......
(Rsoles, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:37, archived)

Its by court order, if he refuses or doesn't answer the door
thats when he gets a court summons.

the bailiffs reclaim what they charge :) and my office paid for it as they feel partially responsible

1
( Chorizowagon Came wandering back on, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:39, archived)

Spoonbenders...
This is not worth its own thread and prolly bindunned



linkness...
(Eli-T, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:29, archived)

LIES!
its not full colour at all!!!
( Sunburnt Tiger Herbie goes Piranhas!, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:32, archived)

It's Got black Grey and White?
What....
...there are other Colours
*Panics*
( Spenface ALWAYS hangs in the Buffalo Stance, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:33, archived)

Ha!
hard and nasti are HBOS
( mr spoons, Wed 20 Dec 2006, 12:35, archived)