so, a challenge I *can* manage


Damn that sheep for knocking me out of the top 3 in last weeks challenge!

From the Office Art challenge. See all 334 entries (closed)

( new_matt, Thu 31 May 2007, 8:59, archived)

=D
Nicely done
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:01, archived)

i'm saving my Excel one for later...

( new_matt, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:02, archived)

blow your own trumpet why don't ya!
oh! you mean it's created in Excel!
ahhhhh
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:02, archived)

i'm not showing you a picture of my XL one
at least not until you've bought me dinner
( new_matt, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:03, archived)

*waves two for one whopper meal voucher *

( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:06, archived)

woah, breaking out the big guns there

( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:08, archived)

shit
do you think i should have gone for a double maccy D cheeseburger to begin with?
does it look like i'm just trying too hard to impress?
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:10, archived)

make sure you nick some fries
makes it more casual, breaks the ice so to speak.
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:12, archived)

two eat for £6 at Subway
i would be able to see how he handles a 6 incher......
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:15, archived)

=D

( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:15, archived)

unless the girth's comparable
I'd say that's not a strictly accurate assessment.
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:16, archived)

smells like a spicy Italian
i wonder if he likes his meatyballs soaked in marinara
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:19, archived)

that post
gave me a half-on.

that's right, it's at an inch and a quarter!
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:26, archived)

trading standards want a word with you

( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:27, archived)

really, what word?
I'm hoping it's "sasquatch"
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:30, archived)

nope it's...
lacking
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:31, archived)

I have never claimed to pack a big one.
the answer to the question
"who do you think you'll satisfy with that?"
is invariably
"me."
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:32, archived)

:) ha ha!!
*remembers for later use*
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:53, archived)

12inch meatball sub FTW!

actually i dispise any of these 'fast food' establishments.

Subway seem like a good idea but it's assembled by sweaty fuckwits and then hit with a mallet before it's served to you, ending up looking nothing like it does on the advert. much like most of these places.

BURGRSTAR FTW, their pictures look like the thing you get and they are fantastic.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:28, archived)

the staff at our subway are ok
so it's not too bad

you love a good moan don't you?
i suppose that's what happens when you have sprogs :P
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:30, archived)

i've been to the subway in sarfend
it was one of the few that was open ages before the current franchise explosion.

i was however very drunk, it was very late (or early depending on your stance) and i had just left TOTS.

incidendly i had to sleep in the car that night as my friend was too drunk to press his door buzzer to let me in.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:34, archived)

ha ha!!
that one shut down because of rat infestation

we were without one for about 6 months
and then a new one opened round the corner from the Vic Plaza
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:53, archived)

so thats what it was in my sub
i was drunk and would ahve eaten anything.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:58, archived)

Hahaha,
You don't want to break out the artillery if you aren't sure they'll put out.

See how far a half price large chips voucher will get you
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:13, archived)

very far with me, very far.
'ning! liking the new ride then?
( drbroon a poor wee monkey stole his face, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:17, archived)

Yea, I'm warming to it
Not the same as my old one, but you only remember the good things when you end a long term relationship.
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:20, archived)

what you got now then?

( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:30, archived)

a bottle of lotion
and a copy of "snatch enthusiast"
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:31, archived)

A mk3 golf
10 years old with like 70,000 miles under its belt.
Really nice to drive, but the interior feels a little 60's plasticy
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:32, archived)

nice
i nearly got a golf convertibal the other year, but decided to stick with the scirocco, warts 'n' all.

sadly i think she may cost me an arm and a leg at MOT time this year.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:35, archived)

ooh!
I have a mk3.
It's a great car for cruising or long drives. And since mine's automatic it removes the urge to try and drive like a fake rally driver.
Mine has been on the verge of death for a long time and the bodywork is trashed (by other people not being able to park - it's never been damaged while I was in it, or even while the engine was running for that matter)
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:37, archived)

HOW THE HELL DO I MAKE THE BACK WINDSCREEN WIPER WORK?
its been driving me nuts
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:39, archived)

push the wiper control stick away from you.

( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:41, archived)

But that only makes water spray out of the back sprayer thing
Is the wiper supposed to start working before that happens or after?
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:42, archived)

sounds like your wiper is bust
mayeb need a new motor.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:44, archived)

yes, it starts it.
I've never discovered a way to start (or stop) the rear wiper without a squirt of stuff.
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:45, archived)

ok, then i need to get that checked out
do you know anything about car stereos?
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:46, archived)

yes
they go Bmmm TISH bmmm TISH bmmm TISH bmm TISH
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:53, archived)

Mine doesn't =(

( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:55, archived)

in the rocky you push the windscreen wiper stalk forward

hold it forward if you want the back squirter to work.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:42, archived)

I think mine must be buggered then.
Cos even if I push it forward a little bit, it sprays water and doesn't start the wiper.

And who knows about car speakers?
My back 2 door speakers and the driver side door speaker dont work
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:43, archived)

could be that it's got a shit stereo in it
could be it's not connected at the back properly

could be that the speakers are fucked.

any number of things.

i'd pull the stereo out and check the connections at the back to start with, could be things have come lose ot not been connected correctly.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:46, archived)

I think I might change the stereo since its a tape deck
I hope its just a dicky connection in the back rather than some bad wiring somewhere along the line. I can't be arsed with pulling door panels out
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:48, archived)

i had to change my wing mirror
that's a bugger to change as mine has the internal adjusters on it, fiddly little things.
( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:54, archived)

morning chap
seen this yet: www.exmachina.jp/movie/exmachina_teaser.flv
( HappyToast sorted on, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:07, archived)

'nings toasty
unkown file type
:(
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:12, archived)

same here

( Thor_sonofodin https://twitter.com/Thor_sonofodin, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:38, archived)

*.flv = flash video, like on YouTube
it needs to be loaded by a normal HTML-embedded flash file, or you'll have do download a standalone flv-player, there are plenty freeware ones.
Newer versions of VLC can also play flv files, but they tend to fuck them up...
( pzyko is a whaler on the moon and carries a harpoon, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:44, archived)

use any standard flv player

( HappyToast sorted on, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:50, archived)

i can't install programs
and i have no PC at home at the mo :(
( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:54, archived)

gah!

( HappyToast sorted on, Thu 31 May 2007, 10:08, archived)

I'm still holding out for a MS Access picture.
Relational tables picture ftw
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:05, archived)

I'm holding out for a Hero

( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:08, archived)

i thought about using access, but seeing as i have no idea how it works
it might take me a while...
( new_matt, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:09, archived)

Access is the Devil's program

( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:10, archived)

too bloody right.
I once spent 6 months writing an inventory tracking system in access.

It didn't work.

(may be related to me having no idea what I'm doing more than it does access being bum-gay)
( Mockingbird Practitioner of SCIENCE(TM), Thu 31 May 2007, 9:11, archived)

its been a hard days night....

( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:04, archived)

bounty hunting like a dog

( The King of Hats The bigger they are, the Hadoken they fall!, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:07, archived)

ahem abbey road
so, something like "mean mr mustard sleeps in the park, shaves in the dark trying to make paper" would have been better. :P

'ning
( drbroon a poor wee monkey stole his face, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:12, archived)

www3.barnesy.org/board/7240484
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:15, archived)

:D
how's tricks?
( drbroon a poor wee monkey stole his face, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:16, archived)

coming alone nicely!
*kazam*
here, have some flowers
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:19, archived)

I can do magic too!
Look! See this Rabbit?
I place it on the table, cover it with a cloth

AND SUMMON OUR DARK LORDS BY OFFERING ITS SOUL TO THE FIERY DEPTHS OF HELL

And look! The rabbit is gone!
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:25, archived)

*politely appaludes*
very nice
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:26, archived)

now, with regards to my payment, I prefer cheque
but ask that you sign it in blood
( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:29, archived)

that made me laugh a tad more than it should have

( Aphex The Mink glasjay.blogspot.com, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:27, archived)

'lo dbroonbox

( Keyboard Weasel, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:17, archived)

Excellent!

( NinjaBadger Come see "The Room" in London- See Events Nov 28th, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:06, archived)

woo!

( pzyko is a whaler on the moon and carries a harpoon, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:06, archived)

that's rather woo sir

( drbroon a poor wee monkey stole his face, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:10, archived)

'ning db!

( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:12, archived)

www.b3ta.com/board/7240485
( drbroon a poor wee monkey stole his face, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:13, archived)

That's a woo
and a yay.
( Nightmare Hippy Girl Be excellent to each other, Thu 31 May 2007, 9:17, archived)