BURN THE INFIDEL!
/answer to everything that's scary and new blog
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 12:52,
archived)
/answer to everything that's scary and new blog
I saw an advert on telly this afternoon advertising a new JML product..
The Fire Retardant Heretic. Only £5.99!
Now with detatchable head, and swirling arms!
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 12:57,
archived)
The Fire Retardant Heretic. Only £5.99!
Now with detatchable head, and swirling arms!
You'll get it home to find that 'retardant' actually means 'will go up like a fucking firework'.
Though I believe that ladies in Kent have been using the swirling arms for clitoral stimulation.
Dirty Kents.
a single JML product that can't be used for that purpose?
I sense ulterior motive* to advertise exciting stimulus products to bored housewives without the TV regulatory people catching on
*like a spider sense, but not as useful
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:02,
archived)
I sense ulterior motive* to advertise exciting stimulus products to bored housewives without the TV regulatory people catching on
*like a spider sense, but not as useful
on account of a DELIBERATELY broken vibrate function.
Also, www.theregister.co.uk/2007/06/12/toothbrush_rumpus/
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:04,
archived)
Also, www.theregister.co.uk/2007/06/12/toothbrush_rumpus/
It is Throwing out some of the best stuff 've seen in a while...
I'm running Low on Woo/yay/Hurrahs etc...
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 12:56,
archived)
I'm running Low on Woo/yay/Hurrahs etc...
along with guns, ammunition and canned goods.
All ready for the apocalypse. Any day now. Any day...
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 12:58,
archived)
All ready for the apocalypse. Any day now. Any day...
I've been collecting matchboxes.
MATCHBOXES, DAMNIT!
What good are they against hordes of nuclear zombies?
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 12:59,
archived)
MATCHBOXES, DAMNIT!
What good are they against hordes of nuclear zombies?
If its more than several million you might stand a chance
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:01,
archived)
and store them securely in the matchboxes.
Also, you could lick sulphury sustenance from the rough strip where you light the matches. Yum.
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:01,
archived)
Also, you could lick sulphury sustenance from the rough strip where you light the matches. Yum.
*looks at above*
I so hope that's my random quote...
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:01,
archived)
I so hope that's my random quote...
one matchbox per zombie will be sufficient
the friction will enable a warm hotness, this hotness will make the matches burst, known scientifically as "the burst of match" or known by religious people as "inteligent bursting"
the resultant flame will cause the burning of the zombie with such a heat that one may put meat and household objects on the pointy part of a forks, and cook it for mealtime treat or simple domestic amusement (this is optional, as when being attacked by a collective noun of zombies you may not have sufficient time to adequately cook the food, however, as the zombie will be ripping out your internal organs and your other instruments food poisoning is not considered a sufficient risk to health)
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:02,
archived)
the friction will enable a warm hotness, this hotness will make the matches burst, known scientifically as "the burst of match" or known by religious people as "inteligent bursting"
the resultant flame will cause the burning of the zombie with such a heat that one may put meat and household objects on the pointy part of a forks, and cook it for mealtime treat or simple domestic amusement (this is optional, as when being attacked by a collective noun of zombies you may not have sufficient time to adequately cook the food, however, as the zombie will be ripping out your internal organs and your other instruments food poisoning is not considered a sufficient risk to health)
that's not in my diary? Did anyone else get a meeting invite for this?
*worries*
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:00,
archived)
*worries*
Now I shall have to weep silently into the nothing that remains afterwards...
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:03,
archived)
Even in your profile, your FPs show nothingness!
office-blockers or ad-blockers (see: bloggerheads)
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:01,
archived)
"you can't come in this office"
"but I have to get my printouts!!"
"you deaf? this office is blocked!"
"printouts!!"
"no! now go away or do I call the 'cleaning non specific gender person?'"
*skulks slowly away beaten*
"I will return!! With a mission statement!"
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:05,
archived)
"but I have to get my printouts!!"
"you deaf? this office is blocked!"
"printouts!!"
"no! now go away or do I call the 'cleaning non specific gender person?'"
*skulks slowly away beaten*
"I will return!! With a mission statement!"
/yes it is the solution to everything
(, Thu 14 Jun 2007, 13:17,
archived)

