can't cook, won't cook


*requires imagination

From the Cooking with B3ta challenge. See all 203 entries (closed)

(polished turd was intentionally vague on, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:17, archived)

CUSTARDY LOW FAT TART!

( KittyVomit These boots are made for walking, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:19, archived)

"Imagination".
*irony gland explodes*
( The Hedgehog From Hell www.facejuggler.com, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:19, archived)

Mmmmmmm treacle tart

( Mrs Trellis has her two Misses Trellises at home :), Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:20, archived)

How is your lump doing Mrs Trellis?
I'd love a feel of it.
(not in a Lebanese way, I am one of those annoying people who like to hold baby lumps).

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:21, archived)

i've felt it!!

( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:22, archived)

Ooh
Did the baby kick you hard?

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:23, archived)

more of a recoil...
=)
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:24, archived)

Yes trelly set up a 'Guess the babies first meme' stall at the bash.

( riverghost I never forgive id=60692,84237!!!, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:39, archived)

What's the point of low fat custard
when you're eating it with treacle tart? :)
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:20, archived)

Cos it's still healthier than full fat custard!!
You can even have more tart if you require.
/fatty blog
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:22, archived)

Enter this in the "innuendo" QOTW.
Ooh, I said "enter this". I'm going to enter this now.

I've always found innuendo to be self-replicating. Once you start, you can't stop.
( The Hedgehog From Hell www.facejuggler.com, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:25, archived)

I can't think of any innuendo for it.
I'm sure if I ask nicely someone will give me one.
( my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:28, archived)

I liked the way
you pulled that off.
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:30, archived)

You can't say anything these days!
I blame Sid James!
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:28, archived)

when i worked in wimpey i used to hate it when fatties came up and asked:
'can i have a half pounder, large fries, onion ring and a diet coke'

bloody fools.
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:23, archived)

I do that
:(
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:24, archived)

You're hardly massive, though.
I need to lose weight, but seeing some of the articles that waddle in to my place of work puts it into perspective.

edit: "you're hardly massive" sounds awful, the more I think about it. It was meant as "you're not fat".
( The Hedgehog From Hell www.facejuggler.com, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:26, archived)

Very few people are happy with their weight
I think I need to do more exercise, but never have the energy. Which is a self-perpetuating thing.
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:29, archived)

oh, ah, ummm...
but you're not an obese blob so it's ok auntie!!
( ivesb Assistant Clinical Physiologist extraordinary, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:27, archived)

I am actually obese
according to my BMI. So there! :)
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:30, archived)

Me too!
I have just started Wii fit this evening. Trying to lose a stone in two months.
Not done any exercising yet though.
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:33, archived)

I quite fancy a Wii Fit
but they are nowhere to be found :(
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:34, archived)

www.amazon.de
Germans have it.
Only waited about a week too.
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:36, archived)

And it works OK with a UK Wii?
Ooooh, I shall investigate, thanks! :)
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:37, archived)

Just the box is in German.
All instructions are in English.
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:41, archived)

I've actually started going to the gym and swimming.
I've amazed myself.
( my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:34, archived)

I got a rowing machine a couple of months ago.
I haven't been on it since the bash. Curse you b3ta for ruining my exercise routine!
( The Hedgehog From Hell www.facejuggler.com, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:34, archived)

Oh yeah that's right
Blame US why don't you? :D
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:36, archived)

I was on it 4 or 5 times a week
doing the equivalent of rowing 7km in 30 minutes. I came back from the bash with a cold, and although it's better now I just haven't got around to getting back into it.

Partly I'm scared of how much my performance will have fallen off, but mostly IT'S ALL OF YOUR FAULTS.
( The Hedgehog From Hell www.facejuggler.com, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:41, archived)

And all that food and beer!!!
I bet you break it when next you sit upon it.

;P
( Mstandot Trying to worm his way back in, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:37, archived)

I'm going to start buying low sugar butter so I can eat as much of it as I want.

( my other username is a porsche , posting shit pictures so you don't have to, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:24, archived)

damage limitation.
there are probably about the same calories in a large 'full sugar' coke as there are in a burger, so if you didn't have a diet coke, it would be like having the same meal but with 2 burgers.
( mugatu Hunting white dog eggs since 1992, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:29, archived)

MOOOOOOOOOOGATU!
*huggles to bits*
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:30, archived)

hello there sexypance!
and how are you?
( mugatu Hunting white dog eggs since 1992, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:30, archived)

All the better for seeing you!
*glomps*
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:31, archived)

*gropes*
:D
( mugatu Hunting white dog eggs since 1992, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:31, archived)

Tut, you with a degree and everything
It's because he is on a diet of course!

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:25, archived)

I am generally suspicious of diet versions of normal food
Having said that, I'm a total hypocrite and drink diet coke and stuff all the time :)

'lo Pot! How's life on the other side of the world?
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:33, archived)

Me too
Low fat makes me suspicious. Sugar content seems to be ignored and with the rising number of diabetics one would think it would be more important.

Life on the other side of the world is a bit dodgy at the mo but i'm plodding along.

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:35, archived)

*huggles for dodginess*
Hang in there!
( in vino veritas, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:37, archived)

I want a custard tart :(

( Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! @thehittvshow, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:21, archived)

I have Quality Street here
*hands over all the toffee ones*

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:26, archived)

I had a hoooj bowl of noodle soup
It's a great recipe. Take one Wagamama's restaurant and go there.
( riverghost I never forgive id=60692,84237!!!, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:29, archived)

Hahahahah
My kind of recipe.

( Flowerpot If in doubt, shop Freebase's head onto it, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:40, archived)

Agrees wholeheartedly!!!

(Stashie was YET AGAIN just outside the "win zone", Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:29, archived)

You've spelled 'TOATS' wrong!!
/trainee BoardNazi blog ;D
( kitaro, Thu 12 Jun 2008, 21:34, archived)