Order...

(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:30, archived)

I know the bloke who wrote the Club jingle.
In your next meeting could you discuss why round garibaldis are so much nicer than rectangular ones?
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:31, archived)

iiiffff ya like a lot of chocolate
on your busuit, join our club!


I CANNOT believe I just remembered that

that and "Trio! Treeee-eee-hooooo" etc etc
( theoriginalsteve "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb", Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:33, archived)

I miss trios.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:36, archived)

^this
and Wagon Wheels at the original size they used to be at
( theoriginalsteve "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb", Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:38, archived)

They may have always been that size
Its just your hands that got bigger..
(CaptainSpaulding is the leader of the lost cause., Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:40, archived)

bigger hairier
( barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:42, archived)

well I do have to shave the palms of my hands more often....

( theoriginalsteve "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb", Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:51, archived)

Maybe your legs had just grow....

( Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! @thehittvshow, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:44, archived)

Well
At least we might get Marathons back - www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-565849/Farewell-Snickers-Marathon-bars-make-comeback.html
( shrinking man Been away a while, time I ventured back, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

I think I may weep with joy!
now all we need are wispa bars
( theoriginalsteve "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb", Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:51, archived)

Yeah
They brought them back and then took them away again. Woss all that about?
( shrinking man Been away a while, time I ventured back, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:52, archived)

*shakes fist*
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
( theoriginalsteve "Evil will always triumph because good is dumb", Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:54, archived)

They have been back for several months.

( NobbyNobody 10 YEARS ON B3TA, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:53, archived)

I'm not sure you can still get them
They were around for a while not so long back but I haven't seen one lately. Think Cadbury's only did it for the publicity.

If you can still get them, tell me where, please?
( shrinking man Been away a while, time I ventured back, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:08, archived)

( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

that's my laptop!
:p
( charlie?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:56, archived)

( printmeister This time yesterday, it was, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:43, archived)

Years ago there was a great poster ad for a health club in Edinburgh
showing a rather large lady on an exercise bike.

The line was :
"If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit, join our club."

Great ad which won awards but unfortunately I can't find an image on teh interweb...
( Beau Bo d'Or Blog's back at blog.bbdo.co.uk, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:36, archived)

There's a tanning salon on the outskirts of Oxford just opening up
called Sun of a Beach.


Made me chuckle, so it did.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:40, archived)

I want to open a sandwich shop called
baguette it up ya
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:45, archived)

there's a mobile sandwich bar round here
called the noshing shop.
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:46, archived)

that's good
but not as good as baguette it up ya...
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

I want a shop called Cunts on Parade
but I don't know what sort of shop it should be.
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

erm....
a knocking shop?
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

Good Lord man, I would never be involved in such a venture!

( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:49, archived)

that's why they'd never suspect it was you
... it's the prefect crime... the other perfect crime is when you start killing people and only stop when everyone who would question your death rampage is dead.
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:50, archived)

it's a pair of plans
that are growing on me.
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:11, archived)

something a bit like Tescos
but more sweary ... with knobs instead of bar codes... and sawdust on the floor
( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:48, archived)

Autobiography shop.
Most of the people that write them are cunts.

Either that, or leathers to match motorbikes. And lids.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:50, archived)

I remember that
was surprised at the time they could get away with stealing the line.
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:42, archived)

What an honour to know the guy who wrote that jingle.
Is he a bit of an arse?

I'm sorry but we don't eat garibaldis in this club.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:34, archived)

Nah, he's a lovely chap.
He's not in jingles any more, he started a ridiculously successful company (that I work for, hence why I know him).

Round garibaldis are ace. Do you eat gingernuts?
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:36, archived)

Actually I love gingernuts...
but don't tell the others...

also I like Oreos greatly despite them being chocolate flavoured as opposed to having chocolate on them.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:37, archived)

Oreos taste of gravel. Well, to me.
But then I do smoke.

My mum makes chili and honey biscuits, they're lovely. Not too hot.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:38, archived)

*wishes gravel tasted like Oreos...*
Oreos are the official food of the universe.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:40, archived)

Nah, bacon sandwiches.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:40, archived)

you've shattered my illusions now
my dad told me HE wrote that jingle...

But he does tend to make stuff up, so you think I'd have learned by now!
(devilstickz, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:45, archived)

Well I was told this on my induction day, by the guy.
And I have no reason to believe him to be a liar. He seems like a lovely chap, and looks like my grandpa.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:46, archived)

So did Harold Shipman

( grey kid is breakdancing to save a community centre, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

what does his company do?

( Prof UnderCover NOT DRUNK ENOUGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

I once tried to chat up
the heiress to the McVities biscuit empire.
I did not succeed.
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:36, archived)

did you try and show her your hobnob?

( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:43, archived)

She wasn't interested in my pair
of ginger nuts.

/obvious biscuit gag #11354
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:45, archived)

did you try and get your hands on her tunnoks tea cakes?

( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:51, archived)

Did you touch her on the cunt,


/fail
( @RBFesquire as seen having sexah time with your mum, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:59, archived)

That jingle reminds me of the latest Coldplay single.

( Mr Gear the gay-maker, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:38, archived)

what!
are you mad, round garibaldis? heathen, burn her!
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:38, archived)

No FUCK OFF I want to be dunked.
Let's keep to the biccie theme.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:39, archived)

*ties to dunking stool*

*boils kettle*

*pours into giant cup*

*boils kettle again*

*pours into giant cup*

*boils kettle again*

this is going to take bloody ages, do you want milk and sugar as well?
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:45, archived)

Coffee or tea?
Tea is milk and one, coffee is no milk and one.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:46, archived)

Spoken like a true Jew!
C]:0D

EDIT: I am a belmer! I meant to reply to the bacon sandwich post . . .


( Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - Jaffa cakes only 500 calories per box - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:48, archived)

Hah, at no point did I accuse him of being too thin and force him to eat a massive dinner.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:49, archived)

Hahahahaha!
gleeee!

EDIT: Where's my grandchildren, already!?


( Sir Aunty Grampa Dave the Hat - Jaffa cakes only 500 calories per box - Ta! Cannaoogim!?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:50, archived)

I can get a finger in your trouser waistband.
Sit down, I'll get you a sandwich.

I said SIT.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:51, archived)

"you want a sandwich?"
"i don't want a sandwich"
"i'll get you a sandwich"
"i don't want a sandwich"
"you want beef?"
"i don't want beef"
"i'll get you some beef"
"thank you"
"are you going to look at it all day or are you going to eat it, already?"
( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:57, archived)

It's very confusing when young men channel my grandma.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:59, archived)

young men, what are you talking about, eh?
there's more than one person doing my act?
( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:00, archived)

Time for your sherry Gramma.
Look, countdown's on. Get your dictionary out.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:01, archived)

pah, i don't need a dictionary.
i like the challenge of countdown :) and catchphrase. god i love catchphrase.
( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:05, archived)

It's wrong now that other bloke does it
I love University Challenge and take it very seriously.

Quizzes are excellent.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:07, archived)

oh god yeah.
paxman in any form is ace. the fact that sheffield got to the final was double ace. that i knew the american guy on our team is a nightmare. that i know another irritating tosser on next years team is as well
( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:11, archived)

Paxo FTW definitely.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:12, archived)

innit

( Tom O'Bedlam I have control of a tank, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:13, archived)

you are mel gibson
aicmfp! oi vay!
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:54, archived)

Your number one dirty jew fan, Mel Gibson.
Family Guy, for the RISsers.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

Remember to put the milk in first

( @RBFesquire as seen having sexah time with your mum, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

No, you fucking idiot
i detest people who do this.

milk goes in last for both tea and coffee. 1. so that you don;t pour boiling water on your milk. 2. the emulsion of the milk on the teabag causes a problem with the brewing of the tea in the cup. 3. how do you know how much milk you want? you don't know how strong your brew is going to be.
( Thor_sonofodin Sent from my Nokia 9210 Communicator, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:01, archived)

I do it
boil kettle
put bag in
wait for water to stop wobbling
pour water on teabag
play with teabag in water for a bit
take teabag out
put sugar in
put milk in dribble by dribble until there's enough
take into living room
pick up PS3 controller
let tea go cold again. Damn it.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:03, archived)

I commend the harshness of your reply,
however, I prefer the milk to go in first. Coffee, more importantly so. If the water is too hot, it scalds the coffee making it bitter. It also tastes nicer. And it does not work buy letting the kettle cool either. Latte anyone.
( @RBFesquire as seen having sexah time with your mum, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 17:38, archived)

I've got a terrible first
effort that I did for here involving club, but it'd sully your woosome post, so I won't do it.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:34, archived)

Go for it...

(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:35, archived)

Nah, it's that bad
have a link to it instead.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:39, archived)

Woo! for shy postings.
...poor seal though.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:45, archived)

Yeah
he never did get his chocolate :(
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

I wish I was called Terry Titcrush
Fantastic stuff
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:35, archived)

we can call you Terry Titcrush
would that be enough?
( My Ass Is On Fire due to constant gas leak, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:38, archived)

It would go some of the way, for sure.
Today at work is fucking shite and being called Terry Titcrush would be second only to large amounts of beer in making it better.
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:41, archived)

There used to be a guy at my work called Bullshit Barry
who claimed that he was "immune to electricity"
( Cockweasle, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

I often claim to have asbestos fingers
is that the same?
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:50, archived)

me too!

( Damien Hurst, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:41, archived)

:O

( My Ass Is On Fire due to constant gas leak, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:42, archived)

Watch your back Tel.
We know that you've been snacking on chocolateless biscuits.

Your days are numbered.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:44, archived)

i like milk chocolate digestives best

( Damien Hurst, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:46, archived)

do you make them into sandwiches
by melting the chocolate and sticking them together?
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:48, archived)

Why, it's my long lost cousin
who is also called Terry Titcrush!
( Wasp Box will give you a dead eel for Christmas, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:44, archived)

hahahaha aceness

(fuckchutney is wanking in your hair, nnngh nnngggh NNNGGGHGHGH, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:37, archived)

reminds me of this :)
( charlie?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:39, archived)

haha!
Never seen that one.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:41, archived)

Is Super Jet Shoes about?
I have just been into Woolworths and popped this on the shelves, from his compo entry "Ronseal plots"


( Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:41, archived)

Haha for reals?
Awesome.
( Ghostwriter can't pick up his pencil, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:44, archived)

Yup :D

( Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:48, archived)

thats ace!
and because Woolworths use display cases it'll probably be there for ages.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:46, archived)

I'm hoping so
I am going to check daily on my way to get dinner
( Winthorpe Sim-Sala-Bim, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

I hope someone tries to buy it

(Super Jet Shoes, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:42, archived)

Yes!
Do more!
( pixel_fucker is going to need a bigger brush, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

"Real World B3ta
Terrorism"

There's this weeks image challenge, right there!

Brilliant!
( Collatallie Sisters, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:47, archived)

That would be an awesome
(if slightly dangerous) challenge.
(Mr Eraserhead Why aren't you a lemon?, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:55, archived)

But awesome
yes.

It'd be like a whole country of deranged 'Banksy's'...

Yes yes yes. Make it so.
( Collatallie Sisters, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 14:57, archived)

Do it do it Do it do it Do it do it Do it do it Do it do it
Do itDo it doDo it do it it DoDoDo it do it it do it Do
Do it do Do it do it it
Do it do iDo it do it t Do it do it
Do it dDo it do it o it it do it it do itDo it do it dDo Do it do it Do it do it it do it o it Do it do it
( ClanSoul thanks, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:07, archived)

Done!
www.b3ta.com/questions/imagechallenge/post177053
( Collatallie Sisters, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:21, archived)

Hooray! Hooray!
Nice one!

EDIT: I'm glad you didn't get arrested...I'd have felt awful
(Super Jet Shoes, Wed 18 Jun 2008, 15:27, archived)

hahaha
awesome! are you planning on changing all their DVD covers? I wonder if they would notice!? XD
( noddegamra needs more biscuits!, Thu 19 Jun 2008, 11:37, archived)