fwd: Plasma powered planetary destruction handspring moduleWe at handspring would like to inform you of our latest scientific achievement in the field of handspring modules. Our top scientists have worked diligently around the clock in the fusion chamber reactor laboratory. After hours of intense study and trial and error (which resulted in the loss of many scientists) the module enhancement team at handspring were able allow just enough plasma to be created in a small enough chamber to create the long anticipated “Plasma powered planetary destruction handspring module” or the P3D. Unsightly planets in the way of you view of the sun during night? The P3D module can get rid of that problem with the contact of a stylus. The P3D is a multifunction handspring module that is capable of all of the following: trimming your turkey, arc welding, fine tuning a musical instrument, transportation (example: if you destroy the planet you are on, you ‘transport’ yourself, in affect, from the planet), and making photo copies. Warning: performing any of the above tasks with the P3D will introduce a high probability of destroying the planet you are currently on. We at handspring believe that you will find yourself 100% satisfied with the plasma powered planetary destruction handspring module. However, if you find yourself unhappy with the slight side affects the module outputs, you may return it for full credit within 30 days from shipment as long as it is in good condition. To arrange for a return, please call Handspring's Customer Care Center at 1 (888) 565-9393 6am to 6pm Pacific Standard Time Monday through Friday and 9am to 1pm Saturday. Please be sure to have your credit card available when you call. Custom cases may not be returned except in the case of manufacturer's defect or order fulfillment error. Thank you for taking the time to read this newsletter and we hope that you consider the P3D for your Christmas list this year.
Happy holidays,
The handspring module enhancement team
(, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 20:11, archived)