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Bad Public Art (This challenge is now closed)
Could this be the worst piece of public art ever? We are sure that you can do worse, so open photoshop and post your monstrosities on the board. Bonus points if your local council displays your piece.
(Fri 11 Mar 2005, 11:19)
The new water feature in Trafalgar Square
was less popular in windy weather.
(
thirsty a rare visitor these days, Mon 14 Mar 2005, 23:03, More)
it's fun to stay at the...
( manwithunderpantsonhead older than a Time Lord, Fri 11 Mar 2005, 12:14, More)
The press would have you believe the museum staff took them down
but here's how it really happened...
(For those in the dark see here and here)
(, Sat 26 Mar 2005, 23:08, More)
Sorry I know someone said leave him alone but I was bored!
Dearest Lonvig,
I recently stumbled upon your art after reading a reply you had written to a 'User C'. I am not an art critic nor am I a connoisseur of art I simply enjoy good art. I appreciate a large amount of work is required to produce any form of art however my perception has now been altered, After looking on your website at your section entitled 'Happy Days' I found myself pondering your influences and inspiration especially whilst looking at two pieces in particular 'hurt soul' and 'soul hurting still' these pieces from my perception were done when you were in a good mood not meant to be reflections of what is felt whilst experiencing 'Happy days', Once I had decided this must be the case I looked on your pictures in this section (Yes pictures) are quite possibly the worst collection of crap in the world ever, I am quite sure that if you gave a computer to a 5 year old child and showed them the rectangle tool in Paint they could also create "art" like yours!
In closing your art sucks! Big time, it sucks more than a million dysons! (and they don’t lose suction, ever!) I know you will come up with some smart arse comment along the lines of your first reply stating such rubbish like 'I am doing it "My Way" and I have people who like (even love) my work' and I am sure you do! There is an old saying 'a fool and his money are easily parted' congratulations Lonvig on proving it correct.
Regards
Young Bull aka Dave Bedlam
(, Wed 23 Mar 2005, 14:31, More)
Two lines!!!!!
Dear User C,
I'm not obsessed by my web site, but of course I have an obligation to ensure it functions properly. There are 15,512,865 views a year - based on the average of 42,501 per day from last week.
People in Denmark don't say it's crap. Not because they are polite, but because Danes love people that do something different and stick to it.
Dear user C, now you have to be careful about your blood pressure. Take a deep breath.
Peter Alexandrof from Noosa Gallery in Queensland, Australia has reviewed submissions from “leading artists around the world” and he has selected 10 world artists for the "10 world artists show 2005/2006". One of them was me. Are you still there, User C? Because now it comes: One of the works he selected was "challenge":
"challenge" by Asbjorn Lonvig
Acrylic on canvas
201 x 139 cm, 79.2 x 54.8 inches
Inspired by Alexander Dumas
Two lines!!!!!
Crap, crap, crap, crap......
Sincerely,
Asbjorn Lonvig
(, Sat 19 Mar 2005, 21:29, More)
This seemed like a good idea at the time...
...and looked SO much better in my head....
(, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 2:21, More)
monument.cx
I know it's against the rules as it's a true photo, unshopped as it were, but this is something I saw on holiday in Madeira recently.
click for the same size ....
(, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 22:42, More)
well at least it isn't a repost
(
urbane legend i have known the inexorable sadness of pencils, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 21:52, More)
Marking the National Television Awards 2000
don't feel the need to reply. This is the worst thing I have ever done.
(
gaijintendo Regular Member, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 18:16, More)
That's all very well, Mort, but is it art?
Previously:
Unmade Nest (a tribute to Tracey Emin)
The Little Mermort
The Stinx
Mort's Column
Mort at Picadilly Circus
Ostrich of the North
Statue of Gluttony
The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Eyes of a Bright Pink Ostrich
Mort's Picture Archive
(
giant_squid, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 11:48, More)
Bad Public Art (This challenge is now closed)Could this be the worst piece of public art ever? We are sure that you can do worse, so open photoshop and post your monstrosities on the board. Bonus points if your local council displays your piece.
(Fri 11 Mar 2005, 11:19)
The new water feature in Trafalgar Square
was less popular in windy weather.
(
thirsty a rare visitor these days, Mon 14 Mar 2005, 23:03, More)
it's fun to stay at the...
(
manwithunderpantsonhead older than a Time Lord, Fri 11 Mar 2005, 12:14, More)
The press would have you believe the museum staff took them down
but here's how it really happened...
(For those in the dark see here and here)
(, Sat 26 Mar 2005, 23:08, More)
Sorry I know someone said leave him alone but I was bored!
Dearest Lonvig,
I recently stumbled upon your art after reading a reply you had written to a 'User C'. I am not an art critic nor am I a connoisseur of art I simply enjoy good art. I appreciate a large amount of work is required to produce any form of art however my perception has now been altered, After looking on your website at your section entitled 'Happy Days' I found myself pondering your influences and inspiration especially whilst looking at two pieces in particular 'hurt soul' and 'soul hurting still' these pieces from my perception were done when you were in a good mood not meant to be reflections of what is felt whilst experiencing 'Happy days', Once I had decided this must be the case I looked on your pictures in this section (Yes pictures) are quite possibly the worst collection of crap in the world ever, I am quite sure that if you gave a computer to a 5 year old child and showed them the rectangle tool in Paint they could also create "art" like yours!
In closing your art sucks! Big time, it sucks more than a million dysons! (and they don’t lose suction, ever!) I know you will come up with some smart arse comment along the lines of your first reply stating such rubbish like 'I am doing it "My Way" and I have people who like (even love) my work' and I am sure you do! There is an old saying 'a fool and his money are easily parted' congratulations Lonvig on proving it correct.
Regards
Young Bull aka Dave Bedlam
(, Wed 23 Mar 2005, 14:31, More)
Two lines!!!!!
Dear User C,
I'm not obsessed by my web site, but of course I have an obligation to ensure it functions properly. There are 15,512,865 views a year - based on the average of 42,501 per day from last week.
People in Denmark don't say it's crap. Not because they are polite, but because Danes love people that do something different and stick to it.
Dear user C, now you have to be careful about your blood pressure. Take a deep breath.
Peter Alexandrof from Noosa Gallery in Queensland, Australia has reviewed submissions from “leading artists around the world” and he has selected 10 world artists for the "10 world artists show 2005/2006". One of them was me. Are you still there, User C? Because now it comes: One of the works he selected was "challenge":
"challenge" by Asbjorn Lonvig
Acrylic on canvas
201 x 139 cm, 79.2 x 54.8 inches
Inspired by Alexander Dumas
Two lines!!!!!
Crap, crap, crap, crap......
Sincerely,
Asbjorn Lonvig
(, Sat 19 Mar 2005, 21:29, More)
This seemed like a good idea at the time...
...and looked SO much better in my head....
(, Fri 18 Mar 2005, 2:21, More)
monument.cx
I know it's against the rules as it's a true photo, unshopped as it were, but this is something I saw on holiday in Madeira recently.
click for the same size ....
(, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 22:42, More)
well at least it isn't a repost
(
urbane legend i have known the inexorable sadness of pencils, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 21:52, More)
Marking the National Television Awards 2000
don't feel the need to reply. This is the worst thing I have ever done.
(
gaijintendo Regular Member, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 18:16, More)
That's all very well, Mort, but is it art?
Previously:
Unmade Nest (a tribute to Tracey Emin)
The Little Mermort
The Stinx
Mort's Column
Mort at Picadilly Circus
Ostrich of the North
Statue of Gluttony
The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Eyes of a Bright Pink Ostrich
Mort's Picture Archive
(
giant_squid, Thu 17 Mar 2005, 11:48, More)