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This is a normal post If you can run after cycling
you're not doing it properly. ;-)
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 21:19, , Reply)
This is a normal post Trust me, I did nothing properly.
I borrowed a mountain bike off my mate. Forgot to reraise the seat after we got it out of the boot, so it was like Danny from The Shining riding round Blenheim. The gears fucked up as soon as I put all my massive POWER through the pedals, so I had 2 gears, 1st and 7th. As part of the transition, after I'd rolled around trying to get my wetsuit off (think elephant seal crushing its young on a Patagonian beach) I realised I'd put my cycling shorts on back-to-front. I was Cameo.

That was just the cycling.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 21:37, , Reply)
This is a normal post Roflcopter
I left my tent behind in a mountain marathon. I had to empty my rucksack at registration to prove I had the minimum required gear and managed to leave it in the marquee.
I did not make the checkpoint in time to be allowed to continue through the night. Given how wet my bag was when I woke up, I was very glad I'd put most of my clothes in a plakky bag when I conked out. After a few hours of shivering and cramp I abandoned the sleeping bag as it weighed more than me.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 21:47, , Reply)
This is a normal post When did you realise you'd left your tent in the marquee?
Those moments are comedy perfection. The expectation, the disbelief, the realisation, the reassessment. The human experience in 5 seconds.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:05, , Reply)
This is a normal post when I stopped at the control point in the middle of the night
I'd been so pleased at how light my rucksack felt. I've actually had several worse nights but the cold combined with muscle soreness and wet lead to massive fucking cramps. That did my head in.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:16, , Reply)
This is a normal post "I'd been so pleased at how light my rucksack felt"
Made me laugh. You wont make that mistake again...
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:41, , Reply)
This is a normal post Yes. Yes, I will
And this is far from the worst mistake I've made involving uncomfortable nights out. A standout was a forced mountain bivouac on an alpine ledge. The guide was cool as fuck. But do not spend eight hours freezing your bollocks off with a german doctor. Or a very young ACFC spreading out his tent in a lovely Scottish field close to a stream - when the midges rose from the long grass like the lord's vengeance.
And don't get me started on my poor decision making skills regarding sleeping with women. The torture never stops.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:49, , Reply)
This is a normal post Lol
Bleinheim is well nice though. But some cunt drove into the back of me in Woodstock at 30 mph when I was stationary waiting for someone to turn right. I was so cross I called the fuzz. They breathalysed me. Outrageous. It gets worse. RammyMcRamface was a forrin. In fairness he was very apologetic and was insured by Tesco, who were very good and got me a courtesy car before my own insurers did, but even so.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 21:55, , Reply)
This is a normal post Blenheim was rather spolied for me
went there with daughter than aged about a year. She massively shit when we were in the middle of the maze and screamed when we took her out in rowing boat. She did fucking love the model village.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 21:59, , Reply)
This is a normal post A forrin rammed me. A forrin. This is why I voted Brexit. I'm that stupid.

(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:46, , Reply)
This is a normal post did you check if he was EU?
I'm guessing not as he had insurance.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 22:56, , Reply)
This is a normal post He was brown. Brown, I tell you!
Still, his insurers were very good.
(, Sat 12 Aug 2017, 23:51, , Reply)
This is a normal post Gordon Brown smashed your car?
cunt. He smashed my business model too. serial offender.
(, Sun 13 Aug 2017, 0:04, , Reply)
This is a normal post Karma, man.

(, Sun 13 Aug 2017, 2:06, , Reply)
This is a normal post Blenheim
is a nice course and perfect for first timers of all abilities !
I was forced to take a detour at 30mph across a field on something similar to video above in the pouring rain by a woman on a bike with a basket on the front who suddenly stopped in front of me to pick flowers (I assume :-)). Deciding it was safer to ditch than to stay on the bike I lay it down and slid about 30 metres in thick muddy sh*t.I got back on and finished but the pictures of me show a beautiful clean kit from one side, and a filthy black mess from the other.
(, Sun 13 Aug 2017, 9:28, , Reply)