Toon crisis
Quite a good little flash fp shoot em up.

may be old.
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sun 11 May 2008, 10:52, Reply)

that's pretty good
is it an ad?
( giant_squid, Sun 11 May 2008, 10:56, Reply)

don't think so.

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:10, Reply)

What for?
Devil horns?
( ragingbullfrog thinks Nico Bellic sounds a little like Shrek, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:16, Reply)

it's made by some company with "viral" in the title
and the item being promoted might not be obvious

/edit A quick Google search reveals that it seems to be an ad for Sony mp3 Walkman Flash. Still jolly good, though.
( giant_squid, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:21, Reply)

Me superlikey!!!

( ragingbullfrog thinks Nico Bellic sounds a little like Shrek, Sun 11 May 2008, 10:59, Reply)

My first thought when it loaded:
"I miss Benjis"
( evil_andy, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:13, Reply)

hahahahaha
I haven't had a benjis for years
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sun 11 May 2008, 14:19, Reply)

There's still a few around
but they've changed supplier so don't have those fantasticly unhealthy paninis anymore.
( evil_andy, Sun 11 May 2008, 15:47, Reply)

That's next to the London Astoria
I was standing there this morning.
(meat2veg just sanded some of his arm off with a disc sander, Sun 11 May 2008, 16:05, Reply)

ow!
my fucking arm!

t'was good though
(The little pink animal is an animator of fluff, Sun 11 May 2008, 16:48, Reply)

13 Year Old Hires Escorts To Play Halo With Him!!!
Ronseal!
( Random Image Gaz me if you are interested in the B3ta Comic!, Sun 11 May 2008, 10:19, Reply)

brilliant
are you not too young?? no we're travelling midgets.
( Nostrebor cant spell., Sun 11 May 2008, 10:34, Reply)

"Ralph's ambition is to one day become a politician."
He's off to a good start!
(lolwhites, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:44, Reply)

ha ha ha
wunderbar!
( lazygamer - pratting around up to and including, Sun 11 May 2008, 13:39, Reply)

Henk Hofstra's "Art-Eggcident" in Leeuwarden
Dutch artist Henk Hofstra is back with a new environmental art project called ‘Art Eggcident’ in Leeuwarden, a city in the north of the Netherlands.
( planearm, Sun 11 May 2008, 9:44, Reply)

The "Alf" Intro has changed from how i remember it NSFW
fatalfarm making me laugh AGAIN
( SickRik AND HIS WONDERFUL SOFT VELVETY BALLBAGS, Sun 11 May 2008, 9:05, Reply)

Excellent
I'm gonna watch the rest of these
(Nutmeg Harpoon named a 'computer whizz' by a national newspaper, Sun 11 May 2008, 9:45, Reply)

The "Duck Tales" and "Designing Women" ones are utter genius.

(Cap'n blah blah bloo bloo bloo, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:49, Reply)

Great dane befriends baby deer.
early morning floof.
( Nostrebor cant spell., Sun 11 May 2008, 1:11, Reply)

nyaaa

( MrA, Sun 11 May 2008, 1:23, Reply)

The Shat speaks

( Pew Pew Pew! Lasers! wannabe Gong Farmer, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:32, Reply)

Whos the daddy?
Shats the daddy..
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sun 11 May 2008, 0:22, Reply)

This will fuck with your face.
Derren Brown, I fucking love this guy. Cutting off the oxygen supply to his brain and then slapping his face on glass. Ten minutes. Just watch it.
( TonyUNDERSCORE from the Internet fresh: http://www.rantings-of-a-madman.co.uk, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:14, Reply)

That was so average

( Carlossus should have retired some time back., Sat 10 May 2008, 23:54, Reply)

his stage show is AMAZING
my flat mate was really sceptical about it all and was convinced everyone was a stooge. however the stage show put him in his place. its great fun.
( Nostrebor cant spell., Sun 11 May 2008, 0:08, Reply)

...
when his heart starts beating again why doesn't his face start bleeding?
(shake'n'bake Refuses to pay into the b3ta drinking fund, Sun 11 May 2008, 3:15, Reply)

The blood will probably have clotted.

(Naughty Tortoise, Sun 11 May 2008, 3:26, Reply)

(I don't think he really stopped his heart)

( magnum, Sun 11 May 2008, 22:41, Reply)

His second stage show was absolutely stunning
At the end there was a spontaneous standing ovation.
( magnum, Sun 11 May 2008, 22:41, Reply)

I was on stage with him
during his peterborough stint. I had to do the whole suitcase thing.
( ragingbullfrog thinks Nico Bellic sounds a little like Shrek, Sun 11 May 2008, 9:15, Reply)

Ohhhh he interests me so very much,

( Captain Wow -not easily surprised, Sun 11 May 2008, 16:38, Reply)

Best. Thread. Ever
Generics at their best
( pilchardboy, Sat 10 May 2008, 22:50, Reply)

That was so average

( Karl Hysteria wants you to give him money, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:03, Reply)

Actually I found it a positive experience.

( Carlossus should have retired some time back., Sun 11 May 2008, 0:07, Reply)

replying in epic thread

( Paster of Muppets Join the 39,000 club!, Sun 11 May 2008, 1:49, Reply)

It's a grey bloke, innit? I made this!
Another religiousy episode...
( madridiot, Sat 10 May 2008, 21:03, Reply)

hahahahahahahahahahahahahah
Topped yourself again.
Bloody awesome.

edit: did you do both voices?
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 21:08, Reply)

No
The radio presenter was played by a friend from Canada.
( madridiot, Sat 10 May 2008, 22:28, Reply)

It's better than ITV's Headcases
they should give you the budget for that
( planearm, Sat 10 May 2008, 21:22, Reply)

and better than any of the shite on BBC3 too
excellent, again, well done...
(londoner, Sun 11 May 2008, 16:26, Reply)

hehe!
Going to have to try some of this one some Christians soon!!!

Top Work!

Woo!!!!!!
(Meglos Cheesemeister General, Sat 10 May 2008, 21:37, Reply)

I wanna hear the rest of the song!
JC is my MC... pure brilliance!
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:02, Reply)

Bravo once more!
These are consistant genius. Thank you.
( Carlossus should have retired some time back., Sun 11 May 2008, 0:01, Reply)

What a well balanced piece of writing
lovely.
(gaijintendo_ _MOOOOORNIGHT!_, Sun 11 May 2008, 15:08, Reply)

whilst keeping uptodate with grey bloke
since as long as I can remember... I don't think i've ever commented on him.

I love him, and I love you. I work in audiovisual speech and I'm studying audiovisual person perception for my phd, so I'm impressed and intrigued by your synch techniques as well as the comedy content. I would love to do something similar in the near future.

Anyway, I'm rambling now. Keep up the brilliance.
( dbroon Catenaccio ftw!, Sun 11 May 2008, 22:20, Reply)

Dimmer Switch of the Dead I made this!
A spoof of George Romero's Diary of the Dead... I think we've helped him narrow down the remaining future possibilities for more zombie flicks. Still waiting on a call from him though..
(ComradePotato, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:19, Reply)

looks good.
you should start an online series.
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:28, Reply)

pfft
8 out of 10 popcorns.
( MrA, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:55, Reply)

Nice.
I watched Creepshow the other night. I hadn't realised George Romero directed it. I want my cake.
( Carlossus should have retired some time back., Sun 11 May 2008, 0:09, Reply)

River Detectives - Saturday Night Sunday Morning
Best band of the '80's I kid you not.
( planearm, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:56, Reply)

Thanks
I'd forgotten about them!
(lolwhites, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:25, Reply)

They've never had any vids on youtube until recently

( planearm, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:40, Reply)

that singer looks like 'comedian' russel howard
also regarding www.b3ta.com/talk/4857358 i did try and make it but it went all wrong and turned into super garlicy yoghurt. but it tasted quite nice :) i will know next time
( masterconnor technique is better than jokes, Sat 10 May 2008, 19:15, Reply)

lol
yeah he does look a bit like russel howard lol
( planearm, Sat 10 May 2008, 19:35, Reply)

Thanks, I enjoyed that.
\o/
( Carlossus should have retired some time back., Sun 11 May 2008, 0:13, Reply)

Roy Orbison in clingfilm-based slash fiction.
Old and plugging a book. Still quite enjoyable if you enjoy stories about Roy Orbison being wrapped in clingfilm. And this is something I have found that several people enjoy.
(Cap'n blah blah bloo bloo bloo, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:20, Reply)

Are you Michael Kelly?
If so I'd like to say I like your articles a lot.
( Last Night A DJ Pedestrianised The High Street yawn, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:39, Reply)

It isn't me.
I'm sorry.
(Cap'n blah blah bloo bloo bloo, Sat 10 May 2008, 21:26, Reply)

That was one of the first shocking things I saw on the internet (probably linked from here)

( magnum, Sat 10 May 2008, 19:50, Reply)

You massive (glass) cock.
kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/index.php/Roy_Orbison_Disguise
( Evil Lu BoB-Squad, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:40, Reply)

The haikus are brilliant
wearing dark glasses
he approached me without clothes
the cling wrap shone brightly

through the flashing lights
reflected off smooth surface
a glimpse of johnson

Genius.
(Simanenyee (killed to bits), Sun 11 May 2008, 12:26, Reply)

Erotic Falconry NSFW
Where’s the deviance in wanting to pull feathers rather than blond hair? What’s abnormal about wanting to see your wife take a three-inch beak instead of a 10-inch African American phallus or a silicon, injection-molded forearm? How can a human vagina or anus even compare to hollow bones or a molty egg-hole. Hah!

Lots of badly photoshopped porn for falcon fetishists... very NSFW
(sanity challenged, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:13, Reply)

What.The.Fuck.
eroticfalconry.com/Site/Fetish%20or%20fondness_files/Birdspray.png
(barst Still likes The Smiths, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:17, Reply)

Hehehehehehe
eroticfalconry.com/Site/Curiosity%20of%20youth_files/ShortsFalcon.png
Nice pecker!

Me wonders if this is a piss take?
(Backwards face cambridge... pfft!, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:27, Reply)

the link is tagged nsfw
so that people can avoid nsfw things appearing on their screen, not so you can ensure they appear on their screen
( wjh31, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:30, Reply)

Are you serious?

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:45, Reply)

er. shurely
the word "erotic" in the URL was a give-away? and if your work firewall is leting thru images from a URL with erotic in the title it is a bit shit.
(Avast help, i am drowning, i am not joking! glug glug gl, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:46, Reply)

get lost dullard

( Paster of Muppets Join the 39,000 club!, Sun 11 May 2008, 1:51, Reply)

edited out image tags
wasn't that offensive i didn't think, seen worse in crap ads in crap mags you generally find at work, tho the guy did have a falcon in his pants.
(Backwards face cambridge... pfft!, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:49, Reply)

hahahahaha
eroticfalconry.com/Site/Ungroomed.html
( Cockweasle DS friend codes in profile, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:05, Reply)

And *VERY* fake... no one seems to have mentioned that, just like the last few times this site was posted, it's a total pisstake and in no way genuine.
(acid_kewpie Vampire robonurses hunt in packs, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:10, Reply)

Noooooo, really?!

( Biohazard Big yellow fanny splash, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:18, Reply)

HAHAHAHAHA ^^ this

( Cockweasle DS friend codes in profile, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:21, Reply)

LIES

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:25, Reply)

You sound
disappointed.
( Jay, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:35, Reply)

I know I am
was hoping they would have expanded to working with blue footed boobies by now /coat/
( Arsonade is saving up for a new box of hummus, Sat 10 May 2008, 22:22, Reply)

Pyro sands
A javascript game that allows you to make bombs and blow up stuff!
( b3tard http://www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/14030< GO!, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:57, Reply)

These are fun with the tablet...
But boring after a while.. need a more advanced version of this.. virtual fireworks or somthing that you make your self..
(Jorvic, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:10, Reply)

Here you go
dan-ball.jp/en/javagame/dust/
( b3tard http://www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/14030< GO!, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:41, Reply)

Ta
Very Much. waste some time on there..
(Jorvic, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:20, Reply)

KILL THIS THING BEFORE IT GROWS!!

(Jorvic, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:48, Reply)

Nooo hold on a minute there...
You are too late, he is all grown up now, and in the course of his hurly burly youth managed to lose both of his extra appendages.

T'was featured in fortean times last issue, he looks the very handsome picture of a duck now.
( The magic of chutney Shouting into his phonautograph over the winds on, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:58, Reply)

It did grow. Into this:


Then it got its extra legs stuck in a fence. He is now a normal duck.
( t0ria thinks Manchester smells of Glaswegian wee, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:11, Reply)

LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS LEGS
QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK HONK
( lazygamer - pratting around up to and including, Sat 10 May 2008, 23:35, Reply)

Looks like the start
of an animation from Cyriak
(more balanced than jeremy beadle, Sun 11 May 2008, 0:01, Reply)

GAMMA BROS
A game that is so much better than you you'll be embarrassed.
( gronkpan SHITRAGS! - www.shitrags.blogspot.com, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:06, Reply)

takes ages to load
cos of all the advertising anims at the start.

try this

also, More religous nutturs, these are parents?
(Avast help, i am drowning, i am not joking! glug glug gl, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:11, Reply)

What the hell are you talking about?

( gronkpan SHITRAGS! - www.shitrags.blogspot.com, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:28, Reply)

er,
like the one for "mechaquest" ... and its still loading now.
(Avast help, i am drowning, i am not joking! glug glug gl, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:34, Reply)

i see no ads
?
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:39, Reply)

Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:35, Reply)

I enjoyed that.

( Cockweasle DS friend codes in profile, Sat 10 May 2008, 18:09, Reply)

CERN's Large Hadron Collider is really a time machine, possibly, perhaps
some pseudo-scientific guff from MSN's underworked Tech Editor
( Gilgamesh - tastier than an unguarded penguin nest, Sat 10 May 2008, 15:58, Reply)

This Hadron Collider is giving me the fear
It's like fucking about with space ad stuff, we might blow ourselves up :(
( Mrs. Sp@m LADIES - BASH IN PROFILE!, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:18, Reply)

This Hardon Collider is giving me the fear too.

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:34, Reply)

don't worry
the moon is still there right? And it's being constantly bombarded by all sorts of cosmic rays and stuff.

of course, theres no reason why we shouldn't attempt to study particle breakdown in nature before we try to replicate it in the lab. Well except that its virtually impossible to predict where to take your measurements unless you create the collision yourself.

Besides, the doomsayers have been complaining every time a particle accelerator has been opened, so is this really new news?
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:38, Reply)

Yeah, But
At the exact moment they turn the thing on... Im gonna stand in a field shaking my fist at the sky, screaming "DAAAAAMMMMNNNN YOOOOOUUUUUU!" .. Just in cast a microsecond later we all get sucked into a blackhole..
(Jorvic, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:42, Reply)

re-read my post!
;)
( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:47, Reply)

haha

( nocturne72 umm...the levee broke ....and i got no where stay., Sat 10 May 2008, 22:31, Reply)

But....
Theylle be able to half the time it takes to microwave a rustlers cheese burger.. Dont you dare stand in the way of progress!

This is what theyre doing right? Other wise its a waste of time..
(Jorvic, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:35, Reply)

it is!

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:48, Reply)

Well the thing to remember is if it suddenly does go tits up
then it will happen so fast, we will be dead faster than you can blink. So I can't really see why anyone should be worried. The possibility of learning something really important far outweighs the risk of something happening. And to be honest, I doubt anything will happen.
(. ., Sat 10 May 2008, 21:22, Reply)

?!?
The end of humanity is well worth risking for the sake of some important information?

Questionable...
(Coin Operated Boy is in the Chinese Room, Sun 11 May 2008, 2:19, Reply)

vigilantes with a difference..
"NEW YORK (AP) -- A gang of police impersonators abducted and tortured cocaine traffickers, forcing them to hand over multimillion-dollar stashes by holding their families hostage or threatening to squeeze their testicles with pliers, authorities said Tuesday."

i love it that there is a find-a-lawyer search box on the page...
(Avast help, i am drowning, i am not joking! glug glug gl, Sat 10 May 2008, 15:10, Reply)

Hrmmm
"The victims were handcuffed, bound with duct tape and subjected to various means of torture during interrogations, including "simulated drowning through repeated submerging of victims' heads in water for extended periods of time," the court papers said."

Pretty good at impersonating the American authories aren't they?

/political commentary blog
(Metalfish Hasn't had a sig since, Sat 10 May 2008, 17:53, Reply)

hmm
Simulated drowning isn't torture...GW says so. You can do it to anyone in the US and get off with it scott-free *




*Only if you are president apparently
( BadBadman shot the websherriff, Sun 11 May 2008, 11:19, Reply)

information held about YOU NSFW
i never knew stuff like this existed, type in your name and see what information the server hold, anyone know how to get it removed without paying the fee?
(ewe, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:35, Reply)

no shock sites please
cunt
( wjh31, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:39, Reply)

BAWWWWW!
marked nsfw so if you are easily offended don't click it. simple really. it's not a shock site it's an information database
(ewe, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:48, Reply)

no shock sites
/faq
( masterconnor technique is better than jokes, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:43, Reply)

hahahah
*comes*
(Avast help, i am drowning, i am not joking! glug glug gl, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:44, Reply)

hahahahahahah

( war3n3xt one two three four five six, Sat 10 May 2008, 14:53, Reply)

how hard is it
to loop an audio file?

it's usually plainly obvious where one bar ends and another one starts.
(hardoff, Sat 10 May 2008, 15:41, Reply)

people are idiots

(The little pink animal is an animator of fluff, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:00, Reply)

its not that simple to do in Flash though
Since Flash works on a frame by frame basis, you have to match the bpm of the loop you're using to the fps of the Flash movie.

if its, say, a 4 bar loop at 123bpm - that makes the loop 7.804 seconds long (2.05 beats per second)... then your FPS setting has to end a frame on exactly 7.804 seconds... in this case you'd need to use 41 fps, which most home PC would struggle to run anyway.
(frshhh /Talk is as shit as everyone says it is - FACT, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:51, Reply)

wanker
grrr
(tronicsupersonic anyone up for some spandex fun?, Sat 10 May 2008, 16:06, Reply)

I should imagine
that this is some sort of type your name in and goatse appears, after a hefty search time. Hang on.

edit: nope, its meat spin.
( ragingbullfrog thinks Nico Bellic sounds a little like Shrek, Sat 10 May 2008, 20:16, Reply)