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NEWSLETTER: PROPER TEA IS THEFT

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This Week:
* BLUR - as sung by a ticket barrier
* BRITPOP - stars in mundane mishaps
* HOBBIT - suggested improvements

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________  ____ __  ___
____/  _)|_  // /_/ _ | "We're saving our 
___/  _ |/_ </ __/ __ |   souls to make
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_|     sausages"

B3ta email 617 - 31st Jan 2014

Read this issue with quiet sense of desperation:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue617

 Subscribe:  b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
 Snubscribe : b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
  
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: SPONSORED LINK 
  Drawings of Vaginas by Teenage Boys
  
  Best title of a book on Amazon yet? Reviews
  include, "Bit disappointing really. Yes, the
  book has pictures of Vagina's drawn by teenage
  boys but there isn't many (Roughly, about 15)
  and there isn't any notes, annotations,
  introductions or any other interesting passages
  of writing. OK, you get what it says on the tin
  but still, very small book with a few drawings
  in. Bought this for my Brother by the way and he
  has yet to comment as it isn't Xmas yet. Will
  update."
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/0557299780/b3ta-21


  >> Sponsor B3ta <<
  Want this space? Then talk to us.
http://b3ta.com/mailus/


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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
  Other than fiddling with pixels
  
  >> String up IDS! <<
  Harry Webshiter writes, "From the people (me!)
  who brought you the Hanging Gove bathroom light
  switch handle* comes everyone's favourite
  scourge of the disabled and unemployed, Iain
  Duncan Smith!"
http://goo.gl/MGiZnR


  >> Twat news <<
  "Massive illuminated sign on Blackburn skyline
  sabotaged to read 'TWATS'," alerts alexturgid.
  Yay.
http://goo.gl/U553Cq


  >>  Ticket Barrier Sings Blur's "Song 2" <<
  Pesky Young Scamp writes, "It's the 4th barrier
  from the right at the west entrance, not the
  2nd, though I noticed that the exit barriers
  from the Jubilee line at Waterloo are copying
  it. Talented thing."
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1129889/


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: USVSTH3M STUFF
  Sister project interactive stuff

  * INTERNET PROFICIENCY TEST - are you good at
  the internet? Can you prove it?
http://games.usvsth3m.com/internet-proficiency-test/


  * Which Obscure Member Of A Britpop Band Are
  You? -Our completely-accurate quiz will ask you
  some questions and reveal which obscure Britpop
  band member you are most like.
http://goo.gl/gWdvyr


  * Play your House Prices Right - We show you
  some British homes. All you have to do is work
  out, is the price higher or lower?
http://games.usvsth3m.com/play-your-house-prices-right/


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: SITES IN BRIEF
  Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates

  * Britpop stars getting to grips with the run of
  the mill problems of life.
http://goo.gl/NfwpeC


  * London's waterways as a Tube map.
http://goo.gl/MV9aDN


  * Brrrrrrinnnnng! You don't be able to resist
  pinging this.
http://garyc.me/bring/


  * Deep dark fears - illustrations of stuff that
  scares you at night.
http://deep-dark-fears.tumblr.com/


  * Behind the scenes photos of Star Wars
http://starwarsmakingof.imgur.com/


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: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
  Yeah man, vids. Will be big in 2014 we predict

  * Taylor Swift attacked at 2014 Grammys.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1130296/

  * Improvements for The Hobbit.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Improvements_for_The_Hobbit

  * How to crush a can of Dr. Pepper with slats of
    wood.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1128752/

  * Matchstick gun made from a clothespin. 
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1129750/

  * The most beautiful thing you will ever see.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1129909/

  * Golden Age of Insect Aviation: The Great
  Grasshoppers.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1128970/


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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
  Results from the Putin Olympic Challenge

  Last week we wanted you to predict Sochi

  Your favourites included:
 
  * BULLET: cross-country skier takes one in the
  guts for Mother Russia (Shallows)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/11051631
 
  * FLAMBOYANT: shirtless dictator straddles rare
  cartoon pony (Jolly Jack)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/11051956
  
  * SPANDEX: tubby despot squeezes torso into 
  official games uniform (HappyToast)
http://www.b3ta.com/board/11052136 
  
  All these images, and the highest as voted by
  you can be found here:
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/putin/


  >> New challenge: Crazy Sports <<
  Why should golf be the only sport that gets a 
  'Crazy' version? This week's challenge is to 
  invent ways to liven up otherwise dull, slow-
  moving sports with a bit of a 'crazy' twist 
  (suggested by Rotating Wobbly Hat)
http://www.b3ta.com/challenge/crazysports/


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    FUN:  b3ta-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
    SHUN:  b3ta-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com

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  THANKS:
  This issue was written by Rob Manuel with David
  Stevenson. Stuff sent in by Captain Howdy,
  BaronMunchausen, Coresink, Vitaliy,
  bananaprince, Vitaliy, Flobbit, AlbertTatlock,
  A Rory Borealis, sinisterduck & macroscian.
  Image challenge by Fraser Lewry. Mike Trinder
  is QOTW bloke. Anal sex, good for your tum, the
  more you bum the more you cum.
  Subjlols via >
  
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  TOP TIP:
  Make people think that you are James Bond by
  getting them to look at you through a toilet
  roll tube. (NoStrings)

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