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This is a question Where Did It All Go Wrong?

Woocfot asks: Tell us all about that turning point in your life when it started going downhill. Yeah, that drunken conversation with my dad when he suggested I become a civil servant. Dammit, I could have been an astronaut

(, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 11:32)
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I sent a cv for a job last week. I re-read it again today and as a placeholder in the skills section I'd written "I once fucked a puppy" until I could think of a final one to round it out
then forgotten to replace it.
I've not heard back from them yet.
It's a nice job and would allow me to work in a country I want to live. Maybe this will be where it all went wrong.
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 20:42, closed)
Well, look at it from their point of view - they're considering employing someone who either likes sex with animals, or is careless and forgetful.
Depending on the job, one or both of these might be an advantage.
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 20:48, closed)
Well if you get an interview
you'll have to answer the obvious question. Be original, fortune favours the brave.

edit: wrong line, oops
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 21:23, closed)
Wait, you have to apply to be a mod now?

(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 21:13, closed)
you fucking tool

(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 21:58, closed)
Sorry.
But ^THIS!^
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 22:43, closed)

Your CV will be pinned to a wall somewhere for years, if it's any consolation
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 23:08, closed)
i note that you do not later state
That you did not.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 1:02, closed)
This is marvelous.
I mean, you fucking eejit, but marvelous all the same.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 1:56, closed)
Mrs Vagabond has recently re-entered work after being made redundant.
I was in charge of proofing her CV, and missed "Proofreading and MSWrod skills" on at one point, which went out to about five people.

But yours is waay better.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 9:30, closed)
My favourite is still the person who applied for the job of email marketing assistant
by fax
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 9:36, closed)
See, I don't know which is worse:
that, or the fact that I think that's actually understandable.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:08, closed)
I used to have a CV which I'd written in MS Word.
It took me quite a while before I discovered that the bullet points appeared on a Mac as little love hearts.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 10:59, closed)
this is lovely

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 12:00, closed)
When I worked for a marketing company
HR received a CV that was 11 pages long. It had photos of himself working out and looking thoughtful , it had reviews of his favorite film, TV program & book it had a recipe for fudge... it was mad ..MAD I tell you. I tried to nick it and scan it in but was caught and told off :(
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 11:38, closed)
cumquat may for pope!

(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 13:40, closed)

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