London buildings
I took the missus up the gherkin last night..

Hey babe,do you want to try the old oxo tower tonight?
( Signify, Sat 23 Jan 2016, 0:00, Reply)

So far...
...
'Chewer of cheesy curdled cumshot'
'Cock custard chugger'
'Rectal Rodeo rider'
'Grazer of gusset grime'
'Scrotum Sauce sucker'
'Gonad-goo guzzler' and
'Schlong-syrup slurper'
All of which relate to Pooflake, late of this parish
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 22:57, Reply)

So it has come to this.

( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 22:36, 1 reply)

looks like you've had a nasty run in with Hitler
You look overly skinny
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 21:13, Reply)

tired and overstimulated
Like tired and emotional but for cocaine
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 21:00, Reply)

drunk
In increasing order of intensity,

Tipsy
Squiffy
Steaming
Pissed
Six sheets to the wind
Mullered
Fucked
Twatted
Muntered
Paralytic
Cunted
Utterly cunted
Cunted to fuck
Tired and emotional
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 20:52, Reply)

To act as Rob Manuel
To be a plagiarising cunt.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 20:29, 1 reply)

OA Pedo
A person who is the opposite of a cradle snatcher, a lover of the elderly. See also; GILF
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 20:18, 2 replies)

Chipolatards.
Two grown men, who's previous friendship has become irreconcilable and resort to having a no-holds barred slagging match about sausage length and school uniforms on a popular comedy messageboard.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 22 Jan 2016, 19:51, 2 replies)

Poofter -- Hear me out now.
When working in NY as a removals man, 'you fag' was a common slur. I convinced a fair few of my colleagues to use the British equivalent, as the etymology is much finer (Urban Dictionary) - "based on the permanant stretching of the anus that results from repeated anal sex, which causes farts to be emitted with a "pooft" sound rather than the usual, stacatto "bra-a-a-p".

I found out Merkins pronounce it 'Poof - Da'. A small section of NY removal men are still hopefully using this.

**The first time I asked someone in America if I could "bum a fag" I was regarded with very weird looks.**
( ProjectWeasel The Bird is the Word, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 19:42, Reply)

I got bored and tried to start a new sexeh time word once www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Monkeybagging
( unclepills, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 18:04, Reply)

Dropping the Cosby Kids Off At The Pool. /Going for a Donald Trump / Dump

(Master_Slob UK minister for cultural appropriation., Fri 22 Jan 2016, 17:28, 1 reply)

Having a Hitler
A mate once told me about some army guy he knew, there was something called 'having a Hitler'. Wanking in the shower while leaning up against the wall with an outstretched arm.
( --- ---, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 16:53, Reply)

Apples and pears
Swears
( dysonology "You get an 'ology', you're a scientist!", Fri 22 Jan 2016, 16:34, Reply)

How do I fucking swear?

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 16:23, 1 reply)

'...as long as I've got a hole in me arse!'
Meaning: Until, if indeed, my arse seals over, it'll never happen.
Usage Examples:1. 'He'll never marry her, as long as I've got a hole in me arse!'
2. 'She'll never fly, as long as I've got a hole in me arse!'
3. 'As long as I've got a hole in me arse, that Cameron bloke couldn't run a brothel!'
( Yoofaloof 'I like it here, wherever it is...', Fri 22 Jan 2016, 16:02, Reply)

Gock.
n. a penis not visible to its owner due to a surfeit of guts in the way. Female equivalent is gunt.
(SonofRojBlake, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 16:00, Reply)

Blacked up Eamonn Holmes (like a)
Of or pertaining to the properties of a stolen kiwi fruit
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 15:50, Reply)

lard-on
The feeling of arousal of a fat kid around cake.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 15:36, Reply)

scarse
The bit between the scrotum and arse. Feminine equivalent is varse.
( Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 15:32, 1 reply)

Profanisaurus
Like this, but about 30 years ago.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 15:02, 2 replies)

barse
The bit between the bollocks and arse. Feminine equivalent is carse.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 15:01, 1 reply)

Cockerney™Rhyming Slang
I spent many years collating all known Cockerney™ Rhyming Slang into my interactive translator.

(Previously featured in B3TA newsletter 566.)
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 14:53, 1 reply)

Bunting is when you bash your bum against someone's cunt.

( $$ ✅, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 14:52, Reply)

Personally I'd like to have an official definition of "he'".

( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 14:49, 2 replies)

Is this for a new book/website project?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 14:40, 6 replies)

no

( $$ ✅, Fri 22 Jan 2016, 14:37, Reply)