Actually Dave, actually
I once worked with a man called Dave, a nice enough bloke but for one really annoying habit. Constant use of the word actually.
One day I was talking to a girl at another office, and said I am going out, call me back, if I am not here just leave a message with Actually Dave.
Aw don't be mean she said, that's not nice, so I said seriously, next time you call and he picks up, say "is that Stopitnow?" and he will say "no, it's actually Dave", I guarantee it.
She tutted and called me a git, and I thought no more of it.
The next day, she phoned me.
"You bastard" she said.
What did I do now????
"I phoned you yesterday, and Dave answered, and I said, is that Stopitnow? You know what he said?"
No, go on...
"He said no, it's actually Dave, actually. I had to hang up, I couldn't stop laughing."

Actually, ten years on, I smile now as I actually think of it, but actually at the time I actually wanted to actually stab him repeatedly in the face with a screwdriver, actually.
*shudder*
(Stopitnowplease, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:34, 1 reply)

Ah, Actually Dave
I had Basically Mina, who would unfailingly use the word 'basically' a minimum of three times per sentence before rounding it off with "do you know what I mean?". So basically you had a sentence that was basically twice as long as it had to be, basically, and sounded like gibberish, do you know what I mean?
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:08, closed)