Doctor Poo
Around 10 years ago I was in the backstage area of the Ashton Court Festival in Bristol. We'd been hanging around in there for around 3 hours, swilling beer and regularly pissing in the conveniently located Portaloo as a consequence.

At approximately piss number 6 I stood up, ready to unleash more urine into the Tardis-like surroundings of the aforementioned portaloo (short for portable loo I guess) but noticed the convenience was occupied. I waited a minute or two, bobbing from side to side to ease the pressure on my swollen bladder when the current occupant completed his business and exited the lavvy. And who, you may be asking was that occupant? PAUL MCGANN. COMING OUT OF SOMETHING THAT LOOKED LIKE THE TARDIS.

We gave each other the cursory "man nod" and went about our respective business. I then had a minute long piss in a portaloo surrounded by the warm air of Paul McGanns turds.

So whenever I see Paul McGann on telly (including seeing his image on the end of the recent doctor who) I tediously remark "I've smelled his shit" And then recall the entire story I've just described,

It's one of my favourite stories
(Noddy Hodler, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 0:26, 9 replies)

Reason you have no friends, number 6

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 8:26, closed)

As the actress said to the Bishop.

(s0ckpuppet logging out to reply to you if you're not careful, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 9:20, closed)

Piss (poor) memory
It may not have been as many as 6 pisses and/or it could have been more than 3 hours. But, yes, I have no friends.
(Noddy Hodler, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 22:45, closed)

frankly a police box is a bit conspicuous these days
a portaloo would be much better - you see them all over the place
(rogerzilla, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 9:32, closed)

I think I'd also be fairly proud of that one
Doctor poooooo!
(teasus likes tea, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 14:22, closed)

This is brilliant.
(cs1ca, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 19:28, closed)

If anyone I knew blurted out that they'd smelled the shit of a person on TV,
I'd probably assume that they'd been rimming them, then refuse to believe otherwise.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sun 8 Dec 2013, 19:56, closed)

I like this
have a click.
(The Magic Number is neither magic nor a number, Mon 9 Dec 2013, 8:29, closed)

FTW
I want this to win - it is quintessentially B3ta. (It wont win because it is shit - but I clicked it)
(justin(e), Mon 9 Dec 2013, 14:59, closed)