P45
Bollocks!

Those were the droids we were looking for :(
(Countryslicker, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 9:12, Reply)

More moaning
As everyone else seems to be doing it...

I've been graduated for nearly a year, and in that time I've gone from living as a lodger with a pretty crappy job to recently moving back in with my parents.
I'm gonna be working for them as of Monday, doing the same thing I do now, for 50p more an hour.

The disappointment is that I didn't see myself being back in exactly the same situation I was in the Summer before I started my degree, 4 years ago.

*frowns*
( Cawl, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 9:10, 83 replies)

My experiences as an orchard manager
Back when I was starting out, my saplings weren't feeling too well. I decided to send one of my underlings on a mission to find out what was wrong. He told me they needed a medicine from an agricultural supply store so I sent him off to get some.

When he returned, he came back with a big vat of cream that was to be applied to the bark. This was not how I envisaged things to turn out. In fact, when I had a look at the label and price tag, I was so enraged I made up a rap on the spot.

Yo! Yo!
This cream is crap.
In your head there's a gap.
How can this cream
not make me wanna scream?
How can I afford
to be the lord
if I have crappy creams
that remind me of wet dreams?

"For fucks sake! Don't you have better things to do than to disrespect the cream?" He replied.

Feeling humbled by an underling having the guts to speak up to me in this matter, I did the only thing I could do in this situation. I was about to sum up the situation in a single line when all of a sudden; I was kidnapped by a passing Alien spaceship. I was taken to the captain who greeted me in his own language. It sounded like "Myb ig gestdi sappo'in tmnt".
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 9:03, 4 replies)

I've STILL not heard about the result of my job interview
I've resigned myself to disappointment now :(
Ah well, there'll always be other jobs.
( TY&GN, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 8:56, 7 replies)

A few earlier posts made me think of this
Now, as I've alluded to in previous posts, I didn't have a happy childhood - far from it. As a coping mechanism, and also partly out of rebellion, I started smoking dope from a young age. I was 13 when I tried my first joint behind the Town cinema, and started smoking it heavily aged 14 and 15. It used to be a joint every day on the walk back from school, which gradually evolved into a joint before school, two during, and another two that night.

I was smoking hash every day - I must have went through about a half-ounce a week. I was stoned in almost every class - my teachers must have noticed my listlessness and general lethargy, as I was constantly asked, "Are you alright, Pavlov's Frog? You're looking a bit...peaky." I had a tendency to drift off, staring into the middle distance. I must have absorbed some of it, as I still managed to pass all my Standard Grades, but for most of the time, I was living inside my own head.

My mother started noticing it - to her eyes, I was slower and less responsive. I even began to stop talking in the house (being too wrapped up in my own stoned thoughts). At this point she had no idea I was on drugs. Add to this the fact that my mother was working as a secretary for an autistic charity, and had been reading up on the condition, and she immediately assumed I was autistic and had never been diagnosed. (She has a tendency to take massive leaps of logic. She believes firmly in astrology, horoscopes, and the stars; she calls me a 'typical Sagittarian' whenever I'm impatient, and used to say, "Oh, it's because you're a fire sign" if I'm ever angry about something.)

She started saying things like, "You know, everyone has some level of autism. We're all autistic, in a way" and then look at me meaningfully, or, "You know, some people aren't diagnosed with autism until fairly late in their lives" and then stare at me with sadness in her eyes.

I did notice the stares and meaningful glances, but, being stoned pretty much all of the time, I put this down to simple paranioa.

My Mum later told me she was seriously considering taking me to the doctors, to get help for 'my condition,' when she walked upstairs one fateful evening to say goodnight, and strode into my room - only to find me sitting there, tray in my lap, rolling a pre-bed joint.

Suddenly, all the pieces clicked together inside her head, and she could see the full picture. I wasn't autistic, I was just a no-good stoner. We had a long discussion that night, and the word 'disappointed' was repeated at least 20 times. I've never heard her use the word that often since, so, by the magic of maths, that must have been the moment my mother was most disappointed of me. Which is strange, if you think about it. Being disappointed your son doesn't have autism.

She's a strange lady...
(Pavlov's Frog figures no-one really reads sigs anyway, Wed 2 Jul 2008, 1:43, Reply)

Internet dating
Seeing as my last input was about women, i'll continue with the theme.

Interweb dating is disappointing because:

1. You may end up with a vicious harridan who'll try to scam you out of your soul and money. Perhaps not in that order, but definitely those two avenues.

2. You might meet crazy stalkers who are alone for a damned good reason, and will attempt to phone you 152 times a night.

3. You may have similar interests, but when the conversation is about as stimulating as a party political broadcast all fire and passion dies.

4. When you do meet someone awesome they tend to live in foreign places. Like Kuwait. Or the Yukon.

There are other reasons, and you may add them accordingly.

I have been single, bar entirely random interludes, for 8 months after a 6 year stint. I had a 3 month 'thing' with a girl who went home to London and had been the best thing to have happened to me in the longest time. But she went home.

And now, who do i attract on interweb dating sites? Divorced mothers with kids. Fat, brooding lesbian-lookalikes. And sociopaths who phone me 152 times a night.

...

At least b3ta is a melting pot of emo-ness right now. Nearly all the male answers pertain to women.

*sigh*
(Schumann makes awesome quiches., Wed 2 Jul 2008, 1:08, 8 replies)

Singledom
Having broken up with my fiancee after 9 years, I was looking forward to meeting new people and just generally having a good time. However, work and my general 'fucked-upness' means that I am still single.

Bah. 28 and single, disappointing.
(Greendog I like big boobies and I cannot lie, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:24, 7 replies)

My Current Job
The reasons I applied for my current job is the following:

1. Close to home, therefore zero commute and save money.
2. Better Salary, important with kid on the way.
3. Managment position - step up, look good on the CV.
4. Permanent job. First one ever.

I have since found out that I:

a) Hate being a manager - you get it from both sides and have to sit in pointless waste of time meetings with people you despise.
b) The stress I lose from no longer commuting is more than outweighed by the stress I get from the job
c) The money is not worth the grief I experience on a day-to-day basis.
d) permanent job but now I spend my lunch break surfing the jobs websites for something else and I can't wait to leave.
(Nitrous Nitrous, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 23:22, 1 reply)

After reading today's posts
I'm disappointed that there are some seemingly lovely guys on here and therefore out in the real world that really do give a shit about womenfolk, but I never seems to meet them.

So to all the guys who have had their hearts broken recently and been brave enough to talk about it honestly, have a hug.

*Not an EMO thread, just an observation*
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:46, 97 replies)

Gilgamesh, I'm sorry.
Threats were uncalled for, and it was wrong of me to do so. I know it's no excuse, but I've been under a hell of a lot of stress recently and the cracks are starting to show. I've been ranting at people like this all over the place.

I'm really not a drama queen or a prima donna. I've just taken about as much shit as I can in the last couple of years, the last few weeks in particular. I keep losing friends because they push my buttons at the wrong time in the wrong way, and it's because things are piling up. I'm a calm, rational person, but it's getting buried underneath "Hulk smash!". I'm man enough to admit that, and it's my problem, not anybody else's.

Again, I apologise for making threats. I shall remove them shortly. I don't want to pretend I never said it, which is why I chose to apologise publicly, I just don't think they should be there making the place look ugly.

That doesn't excuse your attitude, though, especially considering your former occupation. You of all people should be sympathetic and realise that words can hurt, however "emo" that apparently sounds to some.

I'm not sure how my posts came off as "whiny" and "self-aggrandising", either, seeing as the first was purely about the incompetence of the NHS, designed to draw attention because I notcied a previous post mocking Asperger's, and the second was just an affirmation that I don't let my problems get the better of me.

Except that I do, so the point really is that I try as hard as I can not to but sometimes fail.
(The Ghost of Stephen Foster, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:28, 6 replies)

The Apple Newton 2100
Bit of a technology rant so non geeks please ignore my post! :) -

For the uninitiated this was the last in the line of Apple PDA's production finished in about 1998, large touch screen with handwriting recognition and still today proclaimed by some Fan boys as the best PDA ever.

Anyway I digress finally after a few years of wanting one I recently purchased one from everyones favorite online marketplace.

Unfortunately its missing a dongle needed to connect the serial cable to I can connect it to a PC.

This means I can't download the wifi drivers to use it over wireless, in fact it means I can't download any software to it all as the Infra red uses an obscure standard, (however you can update the drivers to use IRCOMM but not if you have no way of syncing the device to start with).

So in short its crap, I can't add anything to it via serial as I don't have the dongle or the cable, I can't use IR as nothing supports the standard, I can't use wifi as no drivers are built in, and I can't use a normal mode as despite having a pcmcia one that works and will dial out there is no internet or terminal software built into it.

I can't copy anything to the PCMCIA memory card as it uses an obscure format all of its own and isn't recognised in a pc.

In short the whole thing has been a colossal waste of time and money and I'm about to take it down the road and throw it in the river.


The next on my list is a tablet pc, I've always wanted one of those maybe a Fujistu Stylistic running XP or 2k but i'm sure that will probably turn out to be a load of rubbish as well.
I've nearly bought a Nokia N800 a couple of times as well, but if everything else is anything to go by no doubt that will be a load of junk

I'm still searching for the ultimate cheapish wifi internet device for IM, Web and Email access, to replace a Psion Netbook - watching youtube etc would be a bonus -Anyone any ideas for one that would actually work?
/ rant over!!
(Titanix, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 21:06, 12 replies)

my career
has been building to this day for the past four years. I gave up a good job to persue this opportunity. Today my peers cast judgement on whether or not my ideas make the grade; whether or I deserve their funding and respect to make a mark on the world...


Dear Dr dxg

Many thanks for your email regarding EP/G008205.

I regret to inform you that your First Grant proposal will not be funded on this occasion. A letter will be sent to you in a few days.

Regards


... feck.


So now, in three short sentences with thirty years of work ahead of me I have been marked as a has-been and classified as not good enough.

The place I moved to try to get this will be "reviewing" it's staff in the next few months. I now cannot deliver my promise of £280k of income.

Today was shit. The coming years will be moreso.
(dxg, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 20:39, 7 replies)

Middle age....
Oh don't worry my mum said when I was moaning about my greasy and spotty skin as a teenager. When you get older it will dry up and your completion will be clearer.

Ha! Liar, liar, pants on fire!


Now it's just dry and spotty : (

I bet when I'm 60 I'll loose the bad skin and get those hairy moles that old ladies have.
( girlinthehole, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 20:09, 105 replies)

This is a touch off topic
in fact completely off, but a lot of the recent stories are meandering so....

This is what I saw in todays London Paper. I think we have b3tan at work.



EDIT: resized for readability
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 20:07, 6 replies)

Just came to me
After the death and then cremation of my dad, i had a long discussion with my mum and brother about where to scatter his ashes.It was decided that Windsor great park would be ideal as it was his home town.Great i thought,very apt.I recently discovered they are still in an urn in my mums garage.still.Who says a man can't die with dignity eh?
(yob soddoth happiness is a Dane called Hamlet?, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 19:59, Reply)

Lottery...almost risky.
Being sixteen and thus able to legally buy a Channel Islands lottery ticket for the Xmas top prize of £100,000 (we are talking 1990 ish so a respectable sum). Tickets are individually numbered, lady says "How many tickets, love?", "Erm...two please, no, make it one, I probably won't win anyway will I!" rsrd_jsy replies. Wait for the draw and guess what...seen it coming yet....I have the ticket before the winning one. Bloke behind me in the queue won the effing thing!
( number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 19:10, 4 replies)

Having a wank...
seems like a great idea at the time, only to be severely disappointed when it comes to the cleaning up.
(Shameless, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 18:47, 2 replies)

dr who
having only got into dr who in time for this series, persuaded by current gf (similar to when an ex gf persuaded me to read hhgg) as she wanted to watch it when she came round once.
i am A) dissapointed i didnt start watching it sooner,
and B) dissapointed to find that now i have to wait till 2010 for the next full series.
(suboftheday, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 18:41, 2 replies)

Growing up
I mean, you have to do your own cooking, your own washing, pay for everything, live in rented accomodation, lose the parental taxi service, and get a job?! Screw this, I'll be 10 again, thanks.
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 18:32, Reply)

biggest disappointment of today
is having been at work since about 7am with no signs of going home yet and having to cancel the pub in the lovely golden evening sunshine....... gah. i hate my life sometimes!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 18:28, 10 replies)

Education
"A little knowledge is a dangerous thing"


How true.

I'm disappointed in the number of people (me included if I'm honest) who have a bit of information and the intelligence to put two and two together, figuratively speaking....

Where do they end up?

Miserable and living in their caves watching the fire and the shadows on the wall.



I was listening to Radio 4 (of course) earlier today, this morning actually...and they had a debate on about whether money should be given to dementia or depression (I'm simplifying as it's not entirely important). One person explained that dementia was diagnosed after an MRI scan was carried out.

"We should all have them on a yearly basis" I thought to myself, "Then we'd all know if we were ill or not"


You see, this is how I think - prevention is better than cure and all that.

I have a pain in my back - bone cancer, heart attack, start of a stroke....maybe it's just the physical manifestation of severe depression.


Why?

Because I read magazines, newspapers, the internet, I watch documentaries, I love words like necrotizing fasciitis - in fact I even knew someone who'd had it.

And I'm not alone....most, if not all of you reading this now will have far, far more medical knowledge than the average doctor did a couple of hundred years ago.

So suddenly we're all hypochondriacs and sadly depressed because of it.


Don't get me wrong...I'm not belittling the very real symptoms that many of us feel...but I can't help thinking that the more knowledge we have the further we get from a solution.



I honestly wonder if people were happier in simpler times when life was nasty, brutish and short....at least they didn't have to worry if they had the illness du jour.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 17:44, 17 replies)

Another 'woe is me'
Massive disapointment two weeks ago on sunday, girlfriend of three and half years (share a house and a cat)sat me down and told me she feels as if we have grown apart and that she is moving out, the following sunday I get told I cant go and volunteer at glastonbury as a first aider due to a caution for assualt 10 yrs ago whilst at school! My world collapsed, I was counting on Glasto to keep me distracted, I had nothing, and then one of my colleagues went right out of their way for me, appealed on my behalf and I was suddenly Glasto-bound!! Ended up having a fooking amazing time with some amazing people including one absolute beauty of a lady who i will hopefully taking out for drinks soon, so to everyone out there who has had one of these bastardly huge disappointments, as the others keep saying, stay distracted, enjoy as much as possible and something will come along soon enough!
(lankynyack, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 17:41, Reply)

Thievery and pornographic playing cards

I was 14, in Spain, hot, horny and with the pulling power of Gary Glitter in an old folks home. Topless brown beauties ran in slow motion down the beach and burst out of the cool blue ocean flicking their hair back in a Timote arch. *hormones may have clouded my judgement*

I needed some relief and having spent much time in crappy tourist shops I decided a set adult playing of adult playing cards would quench my first for big bushed 80's pornography. My young mind could only wonder what the joker cards would portray.

Alas a stern upbringing left me crippled with fear at the thought of purchasing such illict material.

I was stuck, so full was my pouch I could only swim on my back as it floated on the surface of the ocean like a tropical coconut searching for a faraway shore to populate.

A plan formed in my head...I would steal them!! controversial I know, but after several scoping missions to buy more day to day items I decided the time was right.

I was in the shop with my Mum, sounds foolish, was actually genius. Her poor eyesight and spanish learnt exclusively from Eldorado ment she kept the shop keeper distracted as she tried explain that only bombay sapphire would do.

I knelt to tie my lace, the cards were just behind me, sweat pickled my brow as I slowly reached behind me. Japseye, I had hit pay dirt first time! I quick flick of the wrist and they were in my pocket!

And then we went to lunch... 2 and a half hours with 52 pictures of unspeakable debauchery in my pocket. The thoughts of theft and pr0n swam around my head and knotted my stomach into a ball of nervous exictment and fear.

Eventually I was allowed to depart, it's all I could do not to run from the restaurant. With the fear inside me I climbed a rocky hill and must have walked for half a mile before I a found a secluded spot to enjoy my ill gotten gains.

I pulled the pack out of my pocket, on the front was a poodle permed busty beauty staring straight back at me, dressed in a pink night dress. This is it I thought, finally some respite for my hormon addled frank and beans.

I eased the cards out of the pack, and behold the first card, a black haired lady in a bikini, then a red head in a evening dress, then a blonde under a sheet...

"Hmm" I thought perhaps they are buliding up to the real filth... but no. All my planning, all that stress and worry about getting caught was for nothing.

I had picked up the non-nude pack.

Dissapointment doesn't cover it.


Still had a shifty one though...
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 17:29, 1 reply)

HBO has disappointed me twice.
The first time was with Deadwood. Three seasons of it, culminating in a massive showdown between the town and George Hearst, a massive set-up cliffhanger style, and then... NOTHING. They dropped it.

The second time was Carnivale. First season was wonderfully creepy and otherworldly, second season was starting to really develop the characters and answer some of the questions, they got to a godawful cliffhanger, and then... NOTHING. They dropped it.

FUCK HBO! FUCK THEM UP THEIR STUPID ASSES! CUNT THEM IN THE FUCK, THEN FUCK THEIR GRANNIES IN ME LUCKY BLUE COAT!

*ahem* Sorry about that. They've annoyed me twice now, and will not get another chance.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 1 Jul 2008, 16:43, 8 replies)

Reality
It really sucks.

My mind is far more fun, even if it is like a mad-house in there.

_{Closes eyes and falls back into a daydream state before reality can get to him.}
(UncleChuckles "Cthulhu fhtagn", Tue 1 Jul 2008, 16:41, Reply)

stephen fry reminded me of this about fannies
when i finally got my sweaty little hand on some actual mimsy i was deeply shocked, and i have to say, a little disappointed to find there was a pubic bone involved.

I guess in my dirty little 12 or 13 year old mind i expected it to be yielding and squishy like a soft furry boobie with a conveniently squelchy hole involved.

It was the eighties at a scout / guide disco her name was Pauline, she had very long hair, a ra ra skirt, big knockers and glitter on her cheekbones.

i soon got over my shock by thinking to myself...

"she's letting me do it this is great!"
"she's letting me do it this is great!"


oops!
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 16:36, Reply)

I've just come back from an assessment day
for Eurostar in Ashford. They say they'll let me know one way or another on Thursday.

I absolutely loved the place, and understand entirely why people stay there and work their way up through the ranks, it's a lovely atmosphere to work in and the work is just stretching enough for someone just starting out.

The disappointments were as follows:

- Signing in at the reception desk only to see a few lines above my name for the previous day:
09.10 [STALKER GIRL] - ASSESSMENT DAY.

Do. Not. Want. I've spent the last two years getting away from the bitch, and she knew I wanted to work there. If I have to deal with her psychotic grin every day, assuming I get the job, it will spoil the experience - that I have wanted since I was in my first year - altogether.

- The interview in the afternoon, after spending all morning and most of the afternoon doing teamwork exercises, listening in on calls and eating the buffet lunch they laid on for us, is where I came unstuck, once again because I have no experience and because they asked me a really tricky question: "why do you think selling by phone is better than face to face?" and I didn't have a clue how to answer it. The rest of it was mostly standard interview stuff, strengths/weaknesses etc, but I'm pretty sure in spite of having 40 vacancies I'm not getting in. And if they hire Stalker Girl and not me I'm going to cut a bitch.

On the plus side, one of the PCs I was using had a printout of No Hands Kittin stuck to it.
( Maladicta, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 16:34, 10 replies)

bah
Three months before I was due to leave on a round the world jaunt, I met a fantastic girl - the lovely Julie. Far too good for the likes of me.

Unfortunately, she'd just got back from a year in Australia - we sort of met over her photos...

Obviously, things weren't going to go anywhere as I was not going to give up my trip. Even so, we met for a date where she attempted to get me drunk, but seeing as I was in my car didn't really work until she had the bright idea of taking me back to her place and trying again. Finally twigging what she was trying to do, I let her...

Anyways, three months later I get on board a plane to California a bit sad to leave what was developing into a fantastic relationship. I didn't want to give up my trip, and she wouldn't let me.
Ah well, better to have loved etc.

Still, we keep in touch and 4 months later after much letter writing and phone calls I decide on a whim to come back from New Zealand and see her. Sensibly buying a return ticket mind. I still had a year in Australia to come...
Back in England we meet up and continue from where we left off - everything is great.

Three more months and I'm back on the plane and we plan to meet in 9 months and carry on. We managed the first 4 months ok after all...
More letter writing, phone calls and the like and everything is bonza. We plan to meet in New Zealand.

Two weeks before she turns up I'm still getting letters telling me how great things are going to be and I can't wait to see her.
Big day arrives and I meet her at Auckland airport... About 3 hours later she tells me that she doesn't want to be with me anymore. No reasons, no get to know each other period, nothing.

I got on a plane 10 hours later back to the UK extremely cheesed off.

Now that was disappointing.
( scoshi pretending to diet since, Tue 1 Jul 2008, 16:30, 3 replies)