Explain this Derren
Was watching that Uri Geller geezer on the telly doing a live spoon bending thing. Not wanting to break my cutlery, I grabbed some biros and set about trying to bend them. I rubbed and rubbed them between forefinger and thumb but didn't manage to achieve much more than a slight kink where the outer casing has lost some of it's strength. The spooky thing is that none of the biros now work, they have ink in them but no matter how much I shake them or scribble, no mark is made upon the paper. Those are the ex-pens I've weakened.
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Wed 19 May 2010, 10:33, 7 replies)

Bloody hell that's terrible.
You'll have to buy new ones.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 19 May 2010, 10:38, closed)

I very nearly clicked!
That's one of the best in a while!
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Wed 19 May 2010, 10:47, closed)

Bravo!...

I applaud your punnery!
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Wed 19 May 2010, 11:18, closed)

Still, all is not lost. if you melt the pens down and fashion them into a kitchen utensil
you still get something out of it, and that something is ex-pen sieve.
(Cave Duck, Wed 19 May 2010, 12:16, closed)

someone else posted something similar.
So *adopts Scottish accent*

ex-pens-sieve, we kenned!
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Thu 20 May 2010, 11:26, closed)

*click*
best pun yet.
( sanityclause is waiting until, Wed 19 May 2010, 16:41, closed)

Thanks for the kind words
I've got plenty more e.g. the story about the female swans who've all had sex changes that used to attack me when I walked the dog by the river until I hit them with a stick. Or what about the sheep enclosures that I have rearranged so that they no longer enclose and stolen crucial bolts from? Better leave it at that I think.
( stopmeandslapme Cometh the hour, cometh your mum, Thu 20 May 2010, 9:59, closed)