When I was 10 or 11
My sister was 15/16 and discovering boys and having parties when "babysitting". My brothers and I would be banished to our bedrooms and strictly forbidden to go downstairs, despite the stomach-growlings of young boys urging us on to the kitchen. It wasn't that bad, because once drunk her friends would start investigating the house and find us, and start blathering drunken shite, making fun of my heavy metal posters (I was big on Skid Row, Poison and Motley Crue) and being entertaining - they would take the piss out of my sister and even bring up an illicit tin or two, and we'd play up to them saying what an evil witch our sister was.

Her boyfriend must have been a few years older as he had a car, and I remember one day going to (well, being brought to) the beach with them and a bunch of their friends. I can't remember the exact reason why, but at one point I was sitting in the car while everyone else was down the beach. (Maybe I was listening to "Shout At The Devil"). One of my sister's friends came in to dry off a bit, having gone in swimming. She evidenly hadn't expected to go swimming, as she was sitting there IN HER WET BRA AND PANTS in the passengers seat RIGHT NEXT TO ME with HER PUBIC HAIR CLEARLY VISIBLE THROUGH HER WHITE UNDIES.

I didn't know where to look and my Adam's Apple had never felt so engorged in my throat before. Here was a practically naked woman right next to me! With boobs! And hair down there! Which I could see! Or, well, which I would able to see if I looked slightly to my left. I somehow found myself rigid with concentration looking stright ahead, while I awkwardly chatted with this vision of woman who had arisen from the ocean.

Fwapped myself silly when I got home.
(McChinaman banned, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 4:44, 13 replies)

Oh gosh crikey yes
Logging on for first time to click this very very hard, as nothing captures the spirit of the first entry into the wank bank like this one. Thank you, am off to fwap.
(Treehorn's Shrinking, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 9:04, closed)

oh for fuck's sake.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 9:14, closed)

I am really hoping this is a fake
parodying how they expect QOTWers to react this week.

But I fear it is not and it's just a pathetic wanker.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 9:44, closed)

there is just something unutterably creepy about thanking someone for the image of a fifteen year old girl
and announcing an intention to wank over it. oh, internet.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 9:56, closed)

Announcing you are a nonce
with the only post you have ever made is pretty spectacular.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 10:02, closed)

Drat
After reflecting on this for about a millisecond, I realise there are so many better ways I could have written that reply, and many ways I could try and respond to the comments above in an attempt to dig myself out of this grave shaped hole. However, I'm pretty sure how that would turn out for me.... Anyway, thanks for the robust welcome!
(Treehorn's Shrinking, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 10:10, closed)

pull up a chair
;o)
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 10:36, closed)

and then fuck off because I'm sitting there!

(likeajackhammer, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 13:37, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/firstrudething/post1317027
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 13:35, closed)

Holy...
...nope...can't find the words...

I linked through Janet's link in the replies too...yikes...I am assuming that is a lie, but...why would you tell that lie?
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 14:00, closed)

The post has now sadly been deleted...
Poor post 1317027, orlwaiz in r harts, wiv da ankles
(Sir Itchalot has a very self-referential signature, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 19:52, closed)

I take it you liked my story then? :|

(McChinaman banned, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 10:48, closed)

liked it, commented on it, ruined your memory forever.
it's not bad work for just two sentences, really.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 12 Aug 2011, 10:53, closed)