Not good at flirting
OK, I'm not good at flirting. As a matter of fact, having Asperger's and the social skills of a SuBo, I'm not good at people, full stop.

So, after an evening with college mates in a particularly lively pub in Farnborough, we spilled out into the car park rather the worse for wear.

John puts his arm around my shoulder and offers me the following observation: "You utter, utter, utter twat!"

"W... what?"

"Did you not see the way that bird was flirting with you?"

Nope, I was too busy with my pint and the tenth retelling of an amusing tale on how I had nearly wiped out the SAS single-handed, armed only with a spoon.

"Come on, you oaf, surely you *must* have noticed. We did."

"How so?"

"The way she sat on your lap, skirt up to her waist, pushing her tits in your face for a start."

"Oh, THAT? I thought there weren't enough seats."

How I lost my virginity, I shall never know.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 16:57, 6 replies)

Is this a true story
or a description of most of the people on QOTW?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:01, closed)

What is it with people who hang about on QOTW hating the people who hang about on QOTW?
It's well weird.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:04, closed)

I don't hate them
I'm simply rehashing the old joke about people who hang around on QOTW having aspergers and being virgins and liars.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:08, closed)

I'm two of the three
...but this story is (sadly) true.

On the same evening, somebody ate a potted geranium. Including the pot. And the soil. But then, he had a student job taste-testing dog food. *boilk*

I only got together with Mrs Scaryduck because I trod on her foot and she stole my desk. It's been downhill from there.
( Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:24, closed)

Now that's what I call romance.
:)
( Matazone has new icons, but is keeping this one, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 18:56, closed)

Your satire is showing.

( Kroney, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:01, closed)

You utter, utter, utter twat!
is right... I was going to title my response with "I'm impossibly thick," but I think you win that.
(MrPlankton, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:03, closed)

Made me chuckle, this did
Cheers!
( SpankyHanky, Thu 18 Feb 2010, 17:12, closed)

Aye
been there done that, got pissed off at my mate for shagging the birds I ignored the come-ons of
(DonnyBoyBelfast, Mon 22 Feb 2010, 22:44, closed)