I think I am back to front again
I got up the duff when I was 18, so all that time when my friends were going off traveling and going to Uni and clubbing or going to festivals till they chewed off their own eye lids, I stayed at home and quietly got on with bringing up mini-me and working and doing bits of studying.
I felt bloody old then.
He is 21 now and over the last few years, I have become self employed after going through Uni finally, although not having the same experience as the youngsters in my class. I am now free to do what I want, while all those same friends who looked on me in pity now have dark rings round their eyes, and are frazzled from the lack of sleep, school holidays and endless rounds of fucking face painting.
They wonder where their life has gone and I know THEY now feel old.
Having him so young means I influenced his taste in music, film, comedy, books to the point that he now influences me. I was only young myself of course and still SO into stuff.
We have been to gigs, festivals, comedy clubs, talks all kinds of things together. Some from his suggestion, some from mine.
I get to still spend time in dingy gig venues, surrounded by kids, while I watch HIM play, very fondly remembering being 8 months pregnant and being sat, protecting my big bump at the side of the stage while watching bands like Fugazi.
My 41st birthday was a few weeks ago and he of course came the party along with a gang of his mates and I think I outlasted them all. But yes the recovery takes a hell of a lot longer.
Not that I advocate having kids that young, it wasn't easy but I am now getting to do what I should have been doing years ago.
I do sometimes catch myself wondering how the hell I ended up with such a grown man in my life, and I don't feel especially fit or healthy or really much different to 20 years ago. I don't own a house, I don't have a pension or anything sensible like that, having done much of it on my own.
So those of you feeling all young because you don't have kids, I feel young because I do.
But I do know that living life back to front has been an odd experience, and continues to be, but I don't think I would want it any other way.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Thu 7 Jun 2012, 22:58, 15 replies)

bloody awesome!
I'm just arriving in a similar situation you're in so it's bloody lovely to hear from someone else in this boat. I became a stepfather far too early - at the age of 19 and then had a couple more. They range from 14 to 19 and I'm only 37. I take them to as many gigs as I can get them into. Now I'm single and for various reasons trying to work out what I want to do with my life now, I'm basically in the same boat as my stepson...
(teasus likes tea, Thu 7 Jun 2012, 23:36, closed)

It took me till I was 28 to
finally go to uni and do summat. Kids are fun/challenging/pain in the arses to have when you are young and they take your life on a weird path don't they! Like I say back to front living, hope you have some kind of plan! If all else fails...go to lots of festivals. :D
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Thu 7 Jun 2012, 23:59, closed)

festivals=the answer
and yeah I ended up living life down a totally random tangent until very recently. But now I go to gigs and festivals with my kids and they're some of my best mates
(teasus likes tea, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:14, closed)

Blimey...
You sound like a female version of me. Ok I'm a bit older (49 now, Christ) but I have a son who has similar tastes in most things to me, we go to gigs together and frankly it's fucking aces. Despite having fucked up a bit in my own life, I wouldn't have changed him for the world. Good on ya :)
(swervedriver, Thu 7 Jun 2012, 23:43, closed)

Hurrah for sons! :D

( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:08, closed)

also daughters
mine's awesome!
(teasus likes tea, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:15, closed)

It goes without saying of course
that girls are totally awesome.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:24, closed)

indeed
sounds like there are quite a few b3tards in the same boat! Huzzah!
(teasus likes tea, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 14:09, closed)

Very well told Herb
I'm at the stage of having two, both still very little children. At thirty I thought more of my friends might have joined me in this situation but until last week I was the only one so far to have any kids at all.

Big click for going to see Fugazi while 8 months pregnant! :D
( Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Thu 7 Jun 2012, 23:55, closed)

He has spent
most of his life putting his fingers in his ears when he is scared, some kind of stress reaction. I can only blame myself.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:10, closed)

I think Fugazi should shoulder some of the blame...
My sister went to see Spiritualized at the Royal Albert Hall while heavily pregnant. My Nephew is now ten and there is no discernable effect...
( Sonic James Doom forgetting the date since... umm..., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:13, closed)

I could sue!
We love Spiritualized! Went to see them at the Barbican doing Ladies and Gentlemen the other year. Best gig I have ever been to. He is completely jealous that I saw Spacemen 3. Mind he met Sonic Boom and his wife at ATP and got to chat to him about what happened between them and almost got a bite of his burger.
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 0:20, closed)

*Hi fives*
Similar story to this, except my spawn has diabolical taste in music so we don't go to gigs together yet.
The schadenfreude in seeing your peers experiencing what you did but at a much older age is pretty satisfying at times. Doing it all 'backwards' seems to be working for me :D
( gypsy turnips, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 7:22, closed)

Agreed, and liked!
I am 39 with a 21,18,9 and 6 year old!!

People do presume I am much older, probably because I am fat and bald and ugly too!!
(the_icks has the sweet essence of giraffe, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 11:40, closed)

Fugazi
=Like
(Dwarfsmuggler Has hogtied Snow White, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 11:55, closed)