Apparently I'm a sex offenderI was once paid £15 to count the amount of people visiting a hairdresser. I stood outside for 3 hours with a clicky counter in my pocket, pressing it every time a person entered. Suddenly there's a copper in front of me, I turn and there's another behind. "What are you up to sunshine?" "A rival hairdresser wants to count the competition" "Well, there's been a call from the shop owner that there's a ginger bloke standing outside fiddling with his cock." Have you ever done anything that made strangers think you were a pervert?
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rob, Thu 17 Aug 2006, 22:20)
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A policeman threatened to arrest me and put me on the sex offenders registerOn one angry, tequila-fuelled night I may well have ended up mooning traffic outside the pub, only for the second car to come past to illuminate my buttocks in a flashing blue light.
I'm not a huge fan of the police to start with*, and the copper that got out was, to my mind, the very worst sort - short, young and mouthy (his female partner it has to be said was actually very professional). The conversation probably started going down hill when he asked "what if that had been my granny driving down here?" and I replied "I think she'd have been quite turned on".
When I was asked for ID, the only thing I had was some mock-business cards my friend had made me for my birthday with "Gothic Sex Icon" written on them which I suspect didn't help my cause.
Anyway, to cut a short story shorter; he went on to threaten to put me on the sex offenders register which seemed a bit harsh, and ended up him telling me I had a small penis, me calling him a cunt and the female officer dragging him back to the van and the 2 of them leaving.
*I was a hippy when I was a teenager and came from a small rural town.
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Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 18 Aug 2006, 8:01,
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