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Battered wonders, "What amazing stuff have you got up to with Lego?" Or just tell us about the time you got a Lego brick stuck up your privates.

All people referring to 'Legos' will be shot at down. Or dawn. Your choice.

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chthonic, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 15:13)

Pages: Popular, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

This question is now closed.

I LIKED THIS LEGO BACK IN 68 AND IT STILL ROCKS, BUT IT WAS THE WHOLE PACKAGE, NOT JUST THE DUPLO LICK. BUT IN 2013, FUCK SHITPANTS NUGENT. HE IS ALL TOUGH, BUT WHEN IT WAS HIS TIME T5O HAVE BULLE4TS WIZ BY HIS HEAD, HE SHIT HIMSELF HERE AT HOME. FUCK HIM AND FUCK HIS DENIALS. EVEN IF IT ISN'T TRUE, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO TELL THAT STORY, NOW YOU OWN IT SHITPANTS. NO GETTING AWAY FROM IT.

I LIKED THIS LEGO BACK IN 68 AND IT STILL ROCKS, BUT IT WAS THE WHOLE PACKAGE, NOT JUST THE DUPLO LICK. BUT IN 2013, FUCK SHITPANTS NUGENT. HE IS ALL TOUGH, BUT WHEN IT WAS HIS TIME T5O HAVE BULLE4TS WIZ BY HIS HEAD, HE SHIT HIMSELF HERE AT HOME. FUCK HIM AND FUCK HIS DENIALS. EVEN IF IT ISN'T TRUE, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO TELL THAT STORY, NOW YOU OWN IT SHITPANTS. NO GETTING AWAY FROM IT.

I LIKED THIS LEGO BACK IN 68 AND IT STILL ROCKS, BUT IT WAS THE WHOLE PACKAGE, NOT JUST THE DUPLO LICK. BUT IN 2013, FUCK SHITPANTS NUGENT. HE IS ALL TOUGH, BUT WHEN IT WAS HIS TIME T5O HAVE BULLE4TS WIZ BY HIS HEAD, HE SHIT HIMSELF HERE AT HOME. FUCK HIM AND FUCK HIS DENIALS. EVEN IF IT ISN'T TRUE, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO TELL THAT STORY, NOW YOU OWN IT SHITPANTS. NO GETTING AWAY FROM IT.

I LIKED THIS LEGO BACK IN 68 AND IT STILL ROCKS, BUT IT WAS THE WHOLE PACKAGE, NOT JUST THE DUPLO LICK. BUT IN 2013, FUCK SHITPANTS NUGENT. HE IS ALL TOUGH, BUT WHEN IT WAS HIS TIME T5O HAVE BULLE4TS WIZ BY HIS HEAD, HE SHIT HIMSELF HERE AT HOME. FUCK HIM AND FUCK HIS DENIALS. EVEN IF IT ISN'T TRUE, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO TELL THAT STORY, NOW YOU OWN IT SHITPANTS. NO GETTING AWAY FROM IT.

I LIKED THIS LEGO BACK IN 68 AND IT STILL ROCKS, BUT IT WAS THE WHOLE PACKAGE, NOT JUST THE DUPLO LICK. BUT IN 2013, FUCK SHITPANTS NUGENT. HE IS ALL TOUGH, BUT WHEN IT WAS HIS TIME T5O HAVE BULLE4TS WIZ BY HIS HEAD, HE SHIT HIMSELF HERE AT HOME. FUCK HIM AND FUCK HIS DENIALS. EVEN IF IT ISN'T TRUE, IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO TELL THAT STORY, NOW YOU OWN IT SHITPANTS. NO GETTING AWAY FROM IT.

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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 25 Oct 2013, 0:21, Reply)

I never realised just how much having how much Lego in your life can actually how much your hair fall out!

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 22:40, Reply)

My father until his death a member of a christian religion based organisation that is strictly pacifist.
My mother is still a member of that organisation. In my younger years, Action Man had become a staple of must have items for young boys of 5 or older. Around seven years of age I begged for an Action Man (mainly in the belief that I would get to see cock [would not want this to be not GAY related]) and finally I got an Action Man. The UN Peace Keeping Action Man, because yes there was such a model. No gripping hands, no eagle eyes and most importantly NO GUN! Because my parents did not want me to glamourize warfare. I never had a cap gun, I did not have Matchbox or Corgi toys that were military and I certainly was not allowed to join paramilitary organisations like the cubs or scouts.

I had Lego. Lego was my finest friend. With Lego you can build really cool guns and provide the soundtrack to those guns. What are the miserable Christians going to do - take away a child's Lego. Yeah take that parents and they have taken my metaphorical Lego guns for the last 35 years. fuck you.

what you rebelling against
what you got

anal piercing piss, I thank you
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d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 22:30, 8 replies)

Lego
I know it's a link of sorts but do a youtube search for rymdreglage 8 bit trip
Lego Lego and more Lego. And a half decent 8 bit tune to boot. Yay!
(nobber, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 22:13, Reply)

I invented Lego
not some Danish cunt. It was to make a spare part for my synchronic feedback circuit.

So now you know.

Apologies for lack of length.
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 21:25, 4 replies)

I made a gun that fired a string of joined elastic bands.
It had one hell of a range and accuracy on it. Tried selling it to the MOD but never heard back.
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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 20:51, 1 reply)

Super Massive Lego Video
As you might know I made a stop motion video for my musical alter ego the Rodeo Terrorists, a few thousand pictures and some sore fingers later and Super Massive Robot Dancer was done www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbpS4Ua-8A0
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rwbthatisme is on holiday this week, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 20:47, Reply)

Looking forward to being shot down
by Dawn.
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PooPants, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 20:44, Reply)

i thought this would be funny but it turns out i was wrong

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The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 20:09, 3 replies)

A slightly different use for them.
Per Wikipedia: According to a legend, an invading Norse army was attempting to sneak up at night upon a Scottish army's encampment. During this operation one barefoot Norseman had the misfortune to step upon a thistle, causing him to cry out in pain, thus alerting Scots to the presence of the Norse invaders.

A guy I knew used to like to go out in the evenings and get a little shitfaced. His wife was not happy about this. She especially hated being awakened by a stumbling drunk getting into bed with her.

So to ensure that if he came into the bedroom she'd at least be awake first she put some Legos on the floor of the hallway. After a time he stopped coming upstairs after a night out.

I don't know if she was Scottish, but she should have been.
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Wanderer, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 19:38, 8 replies)

Lego as religious propaganda
OK, so I'm a secondary school Religious Studies teacher. For the record (though it really shouldn't matter) I would describe my personal religious belief as broadly atheist with a hint of agnosticism.

In my first school during my first year teaching I had a girl in my tutor group who I also taught for RS (amongst the other Humanities subjects). When parents' evening arrived, it became quite clear that this girl's father was what I would describe as an evangelical atheist. To the point where he had a large black and yellow tattoo running down the length of his forearm saying "ATHEIST" in big capital letters. He grilled me repeatedly on my religious beliefs, and didn't seem bothered about discussing how she was settling into Year 7, or getting on in the FOUR other subjects I taught her for. He left satisfied that I wasn't some kind of religious nut and, being broadly atheist myself, not going to be in the process of filling his daughter's head with "propaganda."

All went fine, until a couple of months down the line, when we were doing the story of Moses. I used RS teacher staple resource "The Brick Testament", a fab website that has dioramas of Bible stories in Lego with all the fabulous gory, sexy, violent Old Testament bits left in, and set the kids a homework to re-cap the story on the website for themselves at home.

Shortly after, the school received a long, ranting letter from aforementioned parent stating he was withdrawing his daughter from my RS lessons, as I had "promoted religion through use of a children's toy." I mean, come on. Seriously? I just thought it would be a nicer way for the kids to engage with the story than reading the KJV Bible! Well, us Humanities teachers had a right good laugh about it! xx
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lucifer101, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 19:12, 10 replies)

I done a shit in the shape of a Lego piece and gave it to a homeless to build a house

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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 18:43, 2 replies)

repost... Robbed!
In sixth-form I did Physics A-Level and was part of a group asked to take part in a competition at Manchester Science Museum.

Four of us turned up to be told that we had to make a lunar rover out of Lego, capable of carrying Christmas trees(obviously) up a mountain on the moon.
The winning team would get some state of the art personal stereos. Pretty good prizes - this was pre-portable CD players and mp3 was a word not invented yet.

Our rover was immense. Geared to perfection and although slow, would drive up monstrous gradients. It also had a large platform for carrying the aforementioned moon-based Christmas trees.
The other teams were a bit younger and didn't have the Lego skillz that our team possessed and had all made single cogged-elastic band powered go-karts.
The competition began and in each round our magnificent tractor would grind it's way to the top of the ever increasing gradients.

Soon, there were only two rovers left - ours and one of the go-karts that seemed to have the most powerful motor.
The last round started and the gradient was death-defying.
The tiny go-kart tried and failed.
Now it was our turn. Cogs grated and the motor whined as the rover started up the hill... Unfortunately, as the rover was built to spec of transporting trees, it's weight was hampering it's progress and it ground to a halt halfway up, at pretty much the same point as the crappy go-kart.

A draw!

Surely our engineered rover, capable of actually carrying things and having a well designed gear system would be awarded the prize over the five minute cobbled-together go-kart which would barely carry a few twigs, never mind moon Christmas trees...

The teacher adjudicating decided that there was to be a play-off!
Who has the fastest rover over a flat surface?

To be honest, there wasn't much point even running the race as everyone in the room knew who would win.
We argued our case but to no avail - the teacher would not see reason and the kids with the go-kart were smug in the knowledge that we had no chance.

At the prize giving, we stood grinding our teeth, as each £75 stereo was handed over.
As the last kid received his stereo from the adjudicating teacher - two words still haunt me.

"Thanks Dad!"

TLDR: Story about Lego
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scoshi pretending to diet since, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 18:37, 5 replies)

ah, Lego.
The perfect topic for the serially autistic denizens of LOTW to make something up with.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 18:07, 2 replies)

Lego car -- on the cheap
[Adopts Yorkshire accent]In my day, we were that poor...

Anyway, my parents couldn't afford to buy me the Technical Lego that I lusted after -- cogs and axles that you could fit together to make awesome machines that actually did things. But then along came Weetabix, with a special offer: collect some tokens and get a free (very small) box of the stuff. I ate Weetabix for breakfast every day anyway, so it was win-win!

I duly stuffed myself with wheaty goodness at every opportunity and in due course, collected enough tokens for not just one but three whole sets of the stuff -- each set comprising one teeny gear, one medium-size and one large, plus a few axles and the special bricks with the holes in and so on.

I had my heart set on building a working car (with gears, of course), and duly scavenged as many compatible bits as I could. After many hours of toil, I had something that yes, looked a bit like a car (if you stood a long way away and squinted) but more importantly it had a working three-ratio gearbox.

I was so proud, but it wasn't enough. What it really needed was a motor!

Obviously there was no way I was going to be able to buy one of the official Lego motor sets, but I had made up my mind and I was not be defeated. It wasn't long before I had the answer.

What everyday (1980s) household item has a small, battery-driven motor? Why, of course -- a tape machine! I don't own one of those. But my sister does! And she's out of the house!

No sooner thought than stolen, I had at it with a screwdriver and in no time at all I had extracted the motor and -- bonus -- the little rubber band to link it to the gearset. A stack of batteries, a bit of wiring and lots of sticky tape and voila, one self-powered three-gear Lego vehicle.

Sadly, the motor was pretty puny, and while the car did move at low ratio, at higher gearings it barely crawled along.

I needed more power.

Lacking a beefier motor, I hit on the solution -- sod the batteries, I can connect it direct to the mains. I mean, the tape deck had a mains connector, what could possibly go wrong? I'll just connect these two wires to this cable here...

My mum came running when she heard the BANG and found me sat there, shaking slightly and clutching a very much burned-out motor, my face and hands covered in cartoon-style comedy soot.

My sister was incandescent at first, but of course when she realised that it meant she'd get a new tape machine she cheered up.

Me? I never did get any proper Technical Lego sets, and I soon got bored of trying to invent new ways to combine the same pathetically limited set of gears.

Now that's a deprived childhood.
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reallywittyname veraciously conspues lexiphanicism on, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 17:56, 12 replies)

When I was mowing the lawn once I saw a red lego brick in one of the turds
It had gone right through our beagle.
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cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 17:55, 1 reply)

I'm probably going to invite all sorts of comments, but hell...
Lego is brilliant. It helped shaped what I wanted to do in life by designing buildings. Not just the look, but how things 'worked' in buildings.
I can vividly remember my first Lego set. 7th Birthday, and the first Birthday I can remember getting money to spend.
So, off with Mum down to the local Toy Shop, and £8 later came out with this...
www.1000steine.com/brickset/images/6930-1.jpg
Which led, at Christmas, to me getting this...
www.1000steine.com/brickset/images/6980-1.jpg
And that was it, that got me started. It was the perfect toy. Space stations, rockets, alien worlds, you name it, I built it.
Eventually this progressed on to the Castle and City sets and eventually some of the early Technic models.
A shedload of potential plastic tripping hazards.

Then growing up and moving on comes around. Lego gets put away into the roof to collect dust for a number of years, eventually all getting sold when the parents had a big clear out and I moved on.
The Lego sets kept me amused for hours, probably far more than was healthy and as said, eventually led to me doing what I do for a living. It was a natural transition.

Then they brought out the Minifigure sets a few years back. Nostalgia kicked in.

To date, one of the walls in the home office looks like this...

(Please excuse crappy cameraphone shot)
All 11 sets to date, except for that damned 'Mr. Gold' figure. The bastard.

Then they brought out the Lord of the Rings/Hobbit Sets. Currently up to date with those as well (Tower of Orthanc set just arrived in time for Christmas) and occasionally
I'll dabble in various MOCs which have included a 'Masonic Temple' among other things

So yeah, Lego. I love it. And I'm a grown man of 37 who owes his current profession and business to playing with those plastic bricks as a kid.
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The Great Architect is still waiting for his account to be deleted on, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 17:48, 10 replies)

Lego cat
I had a big crate of Lego given to me by a family friend.

It was great and hours of fun.

Not so much fun when the family cat decided to spray the box with liquid shit.

I have vivid memories of my mum washing the Lego in the kitchen sink and retching.
(Deskbound You insignificant speck of dust, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 17:45, Reply)

This is pretty frickin' awesome
www.youtube.com/watch?v=qEx2LQY_1W0
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emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 17:02, 1 reply)

I had some Lego when I was about 10 years old.
And that's pretty much it really.
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:49, Reply)

I couldn't fit the cobras in the radiator because it was full of Lego bricks.

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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:44, Reply)

I used to use it to build models of spaceships.

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The Awful Puppy Bakery is still bored, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:40, Reply)

Is it just me.....
.. or is there something just a little bit wrong in being a 30 something woman obsessed with lego?
Harry Potter lego in particular.
An online friend who I had known for years, she used to ask me to buy certain HP minifigs for her here in the UK and post them over, seemed harmless enough.
Then she came over to the UK to visit Legoland and asked if I could put her up for a few days.
If theres ever a QOTW about how meeting an online friend went horribly wrong, I'll maybe post the whole story.
But one of the many reasons she is now an ex mate is she spent the whole time at my place sprawled across the living room floor playing with lego, loads of it.
I couldnt move around the room without pointedly having to step over her or the blasted things.
She eventually got a job at Legoland but left after 2 weeks because she didnt like the food
Crazy woman

Well there you go, a boring story about lego
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:34, 15 replies)

NSFW
The original image from Emvee's website that prompted the question.

ileftmytoysout.tumblr.com/post/35821697280

NSFW.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:31, 35 replies)

A time-traveller.
What?
Knock knock!
Who's th...
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.Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:28, Reply)

Knock knock.
Who's there?

A person who's been buried alive.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:27, Reply)

I enjoyed playing with Lego as a child.
I am now an adult.

Now can we have a different question?
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:19, 7 replies)

What I did at the weekend.
Me and my mate paul were once younger than we we are now. It happens.
We'd been building a bunch of stuff outta lego; cars, boats, that sorta thing. We'd built the walls and floor of a house, then captured a bee inside and attached a roof.
We then carried on playing with the lego.
The time came to destroy all lego, put it back in the box and go in for tea. The last thing we smashed was the house.
The bee wasn't happy and expressed this by stinging me on my arm.
Paul had to go home. The End.
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Ya What Skiddlyboop, Thu 24 Oct 2013, 16:15, 3 replies)

This question is now closed.

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