No black teachers
A language school in Warsaw had one big draw to get new students; a course taught entirely by a native English speaker. For any who have done TEFL, this has its pros and cons. On the plus side, students get access to "real" English, and don't learn some bastard approximation of English from the "local" teachers, who all sound like Russian bad guys in a James Bond movie. On the flip side, most "natives" have had zero training and couldn't tell their verb from their elbow if asked (which Polish students do, regularly). Despite the lack of qualifications, most natives command a higher hourly rate than the local teachers, but more importantly allow the school to charge a much higher price for the courses.

This school had two teachers. Charles was born in Surrey, was university educated with a CTELFA qualification and a degree in English, and had been teaching for over 5 years. He knew the ins and outs, he knew what specific problems Poles have with the language and how to overcome them, and best of all, he had the smooth mellifluous tones of a continuity announcer. Only trouble is, he was black. Very black. Treacle-covered black pudding on a plate of pure asphalt black. The school sent him to the client for induction training.

Next day there was a complaint. "None of the students can understand the teacher. His accent is atrocious, no-one knows what he's talking about. He's the worst teacher we've ever had. Send a replacement."

What? Charles has never had a blemish on his career in his life. His appraisals come back perfect, and he's even taught other teachers. Still, the client's always right, so the school sends the other teacher; a drunken slob from South Africa that they usually reserve for "conversation classes", since Sam knows fuck-all about grammar and even less about professional decorum.

Apparently the clients were delighted and found Sam "far easier to understand", which is odd since, punctuated with hiccups and burps, his opening phrase is "Willkem tee Inglish klors, moi naym ees Sim en oil bi titching yu fi thee rist iv thee simistah".
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 10:35, 3 replies)

I call bullshit
You don't get blacks from Surrey
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 10:59, closed)

Bloody Polish
Staying over there all racist and giving our jobs to South Africans.
(Eukanuba, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 14:06, closed)

EXCACTLY

( the prick of misery pierced my foot on a spiiiike on, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:23, closed)