Singalong
My Dad used to travel to Japan on business reasonably often - everyone's probably aware that the Japanese are very formal in work, but do like to let their hair down after work with a lot of drinking and singing.

After one particularly good day of business my father was invited out to the bar with all his Japanese colleagues for a traditional 'get smashed and sing' session. This was in the days before karaoke machines so everyone had to sing their party piece.

After numerous beers and whiskies it was my dad's turn. He couldn't sing at all, and usually managed to avoid having to take part, but this time there was no escape. He was helped up onto the table top, beer in hand, and everyone cheered him on.

But his mind was a blank: he couldn't remember a single song, not even a hymn or nursery rhyme. The only thing that came into his head was a song he used to sing 20 years earlier, with his fellow commuters on the train to and from Birmingham, which they had made up based on the notice on the old train carriage:

"To stop the train
In cases of emergency
Pull down the cha-a-in
Pull down the cha-a-in
Penalty for improper use
Twenty five pounds"

He drained his beer, sang the song twice through, saluted, then fell off the table into a crowd of drunken Japanese businessmen.
(Smale is stuffed, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 7:29, 6 replies)

Are non sequiturs an obsolete talent?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 7:58, closed)

Pianos

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:36, closed)

Virginia.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:49, closed)

I believe 'karaoke'
translates from the Japanese as meaning 'fat businessman embarrassing himself'
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:09, closed)

coincidentally
so does Bukakke
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Tue 5 Jul 2011, 8:36, closed)

Why...
...am I laughing so much at this one? :D
( Mike Fishcake teamfishcake.co.uk - better than your mum's face, Wed 6 Jul 2011, 13:00, closed)