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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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News linksss
www.guardian.co.uk/politics/blog/2012/apr/03/boris-johnson-and-ken-livingstone-live-hustings-transport-london
Boris and Ken in Lift row shocker. Who's the real fucking liar? You are.

Also disabled dating www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-17584953 would you date someone in a wheelchair? What's your disability limit for loooove?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:06, Reply)
I've just been reading that.
I like the idea of Johnson having the audacity to call someone else a liar.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:08, Reply)
Some reports are he said "its all fucking lies" rather than "you're a fucking liar"
which could be spun as better.
Ken must be smugging it right up.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:10, Reply)
that is Ken's default setting

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:14, Reply)
You must agree that ken is an odious little turd though?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:13, Reply)
He is quite smug, but compared with Johnson he's like a saint.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:17, Reply)
really?
REALLY?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:19, Reply)
Yes. Johnson is entirely about his own vanity projects e.g the new routemaster
in 4 years of office he hasn't bothered to meet with the tube unions once. Ken may be a prick as a person, but at least he got things done and doesn't have such a horrendously selfish attitude.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:22, Reply)
I wouldn't meet with the unions, bunch of selfish cunts
I'd vote for Boris every time purely on his pledge to introduce driverless trains
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:29, Reply)
Which he'll pledge as costing no money for the taxpayer
and then cost £75million, and 7Million a year, like the bikes?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:31, Reply)
excellent stuff
anyway you don't get a say as you live in the provinces
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:33, Reply)
I am totally gutted I don't get to choose between those two people to control my town.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:40, Reply)
It's not just those 2
If you want to you can waste your vote on Brian Paddick.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:42, Reply)
It would be very interesting to see what happen if, say, the cable had snapped on that lift
It really is a two-horse race at the moment - nobody seems to know a thing about the other candidates.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:45, Reply)
Paddick will never win because he's a lib dem. And everyone quite understandably thinks they are all deceitful cunts
The other bird is a Green I think. But since I don't even know her name there is very little chance of her getting in.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:49, Reply)
he's also a terrible queer

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:53, Reply)
You're just like a tesco value version of Monty.
It's quite sweet.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:54, Reply)
*steps up from Lidl*
whoop
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:57, Reply)
I could never bring myself to vote for Boris.
He's a devious cunt, with a talent for using big publicity stunts as covers for burying bad news. I wouldn't trust him as far as I could throw him, and I certainly couldn't throw the toffee-nosed sack of shit any distance.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:33, Reply)

Boris any politician
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:35, Reply)
Boris in particular
I'm wary of him because I can see he's got a good handle on his public image. Mixing that with a mentally retarded electorate is a dangerous combination.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:36, Reply)
Homebrew is fermenting now btw.
I've put a jumper on it to keep it snug and warm.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:38, Reply)
Nice one
Once it gets going that valve should start gurgling in the top - it's quite nice, almost like it's speaking to you.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:40, Reply)
My fridge is a bit like that with all the cheese that's in it at the moment.
Last night I ate a great big piece of stilton before dinner.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:42, Reply)
I envy you.
I'd love to have a fridge full of fancy cheese, though I think it might kill my flatmates.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:46, Reply)
It's started getting sediment and the ring.. I've forgotten what that's called
but hopefully it'll be bubbling in the next day or two.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:53, Reply)
Alt: three tits probably

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:15, Reply)
You'd stop at three?
Just think of the fun you could have with four...
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:16, Reply)
Or six, if you're Jeff

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:22, Reply)
I want Livingstone to die more than words can explain.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:16, Reply)
he is a slimey tax dodging oik

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:16, Reply)
But so is Johnson.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:20, Reply)
Johnson is neither slimey nor an oik
I cannot comment on tax dodging due to ongoing legal proceedings
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:21, Reply)
Cannot make up my mind who to vote for in the London Mayoral election.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:17, Reply)
Vote for NAKEDAPE

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:18, Reply)
Never.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:20, Reply)
Arrr maaaan, go on, pleeeease?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:29, Reply)
i lost my virginity to a deaf bloke
He was about the hottest man I've ever laid eyes on
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:18, Reply)
Was he greased up?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:19, Reply)
what?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:21, Reply)
Was your dad hovering outside the door waiting for the money shot groans to start so he knew when to burst in?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:23, Reply)

HERE
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:23, Reply)
oh

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:33, Reply)
Hahahaha
Geniune office lols
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:22, Reply)
Pardon

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:22, Reply)
i slept with a deaf girl once, true story
best of all i called her by my ex's name when taking her from behind AND SHE NEVER KNEW
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:23, Reply)
She felt the tears on her back though.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:30, Reply)
like times 5,000

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:32, Reply)
lucky for me she just thought i was rhythm methoding

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:33, Reply)
Quadraspazzed on a life glug

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:22, Reply)
I'd probably say no to wheelchairs because of practical thinking
but the girl in the wheelchair there is really hot.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:23, Reply)
'Shannon Murray says physical access is paramount on dates'
Damn right. Access straight between the top of her legs.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:26, Reply)
left or right?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:27, Reply)
both

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:29, Reply)
at the same time
like sexy dodgems
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:30, Reply)
One halfway down on the right.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:29, Reply)
where?
right there...oh no wait she can't get up the stairs can she?
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:35, Reply)
and she cant run away

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:34, Reply)
"I pretend my epilepsy meds are vitamins. Nobody wants a one night stand with an epileptic"
I dunno, all that fitting could really spice things up
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:31, Reply)
Sub thread: epilleptic chat up lines
"It's not just your medical alert bracelett that tells me you're a fitty"
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:32, Reply)
I heard Bella has to take 10 pills a day to temper her epilepsy
she still loves to shake, rattle and roll though...
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:34, Reply)
you can choke on my sock, any time

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:56, Reply)
if you're chatting up a man eipileptic;
i bet if you tried to put your cock inside me it wouldn't fit
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:59, Reply)
My Brother is Epileptic
I am going to tell him all these!
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:04, Reply)
put on a strobe light next time you make love to him
and sing 'I like the way you move'
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:07, Reply)
Well anyone reading that now knows Helen is a slag and well up for no strings sex

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:09, Reply)
I'll be honest, I think I would prefer dating someone who is disabled, depending on their disability.
1) They'll be able to understand what its like for me to be ill most of the time.
2) I can look after them, and them look after me, and I like that.
3) It's easier to get a parking space, if I drove, which I don't.

Women are a lot like parking spaces, when all the good ones are taken you sometimes have to use the disabled one.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:36, Reply)
Do you get a disabled parking badge in case you need to run in and use a toilet?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:37, Reply)
Philosophy for life that is.
Or just as you see a good one some cunt with a bmw slips in before you.
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 13:38, Reply)
Women are like parking spaces, they're whores and they're liars.

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:03, Reply)
haha! totally

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:04, Reply)
I'd rather date a spazmo than the Miss Cornwall winner
www.thisiscornwall.co.uk/Police-officer-Alice-makes-arresting-sight-ndash/story-15703808-detail/story.html

Mind you the first comment is great

“As a police officer I wonder if she has ever been involved in anything when back doors were smashed in?”
(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:14, Reply)
What in the fuck is going on with the guy on the left's face?

(, Tue 3 Apr 2012, 14:20, Reply)

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