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(I helped save b3ta! rob Hello, I'm a board sig., Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Come on kids.
Some of you must have decided to spend some of the bank holiday on the sofa!
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:48, Reply)
I'm on the sofa, Jeff
I have beer and records and I am browsing the Internet for more records.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:52, Reply)
I've got Ribena.
But I might have a smoke in a minute.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:53, Reply)
I'd love a smoke right now

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:56, Reply)
Why not have one then.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:57, Reply)
Nothing to smoke
And I'm not allowed.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:59, Reply)
Well that's you fucked then, innit.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:59, Reply)
It fucking well is, alright

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:00, Reply)
Have another beer instead.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:01, Reply)
Oh I will.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:03, Reply)
I might have one when i've finished my Ribena.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:03, Reply)
I've got some lovely stuff

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:00, Reply)
I'm very jealous
I'd settle for some mediocre homegrown right now though.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:02, Reply)
I'll bet you'd even consider soapbar.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:03, Reply)
I used to smoke tons of shite solid when I was a student.
Then the hydroponics industry took off in this country and suddenly there was an abundance of nice weed.
But to answer your question, yes I'd just like to be stoned.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:11, Reply)
I'll smoke one for you, right now.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
Yeah, thanks.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:08, Reply)
the sofa is over there
I could get the netbook and move the 2 metres to have a sit down on it.

I've been feeling spaced all day and achieved very very little
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:54, Reply)
What were you hoping to get done and what have you failed to do?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:57, Reply)
I don't really know
I have lots of things I could do over the break, I've done a few. Still need to fix photoshop, mark work, read lots of things for important thing in a few weeks' time, clean out car, take things to the dump, sort out art room, change addresses on things. Shit, that list got long quickly. I think I should have fun at some point, too, but I don't know what that would entail
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:00, Reply)
Save up all your fun point until JeffSTOCK.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:02, Reply)
But then I will pop with fun
I need to let some out slowly to avoid danger
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:06, Reply)
Why not spend some time in the 'Cavy outdoor shag shed?'

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
on my own that is basically just wanking in a shed.

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:08, Reply)
Well, it's somewhere else to have a wank.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
variety is the spice of life

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
What are you going to do tomorrow?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:12, Reply)
*shrugs*
feed a cat, go to a gig. Not sure about the rest
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:13, Reply)
Why not chat to the piggies.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)
i always do

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)
You could download some telly.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:15, Reply)
where do you download your telly from?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
I don't. I tend to watch proper telly.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:18, Reply)
I can see why you have achieved very little then
That all sounds incredibly dull.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:03, Reply)
seriously is
I think I need to make something or do some art or something, that usually cheers me up
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:06, Reply)
I went to see some art last night
My friend had some work on display at an exhibition in town.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
what kind of arts?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:09, Reply)
My friend's was a sound installation/sculpture
But there was other stuff there too.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:16, Reply)
I'm Playing video games at my mates house. Living the dream

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:58, Reply)
I thought you were going out in Bristol this evening,

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 20:59, Reply)
At mates now in bed minster might go to pub in a bit.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:00, Reply)
Go to the Spotted Cow.
It's a nice pub. I took Lighty there.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:02, Reply)
Moo would suggest a gay pub like that.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
Pull the udder one.
It's a great pub.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:09, Reply)
We cud go there I suppose

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
make sure they put the heating on
otherwise you'll be....

and have to wear a...
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:11, Reply)
I dairy ya to.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:12, Reply)
Baz is staying in til Sunday and Monday cos thems are the big ones.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
Who have Fulham got over the weekend?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:33, Reply)
Bolton away tomorrow (snooze)
Chelsea at home on Monday. I'm supposed to be going, got a free ticket, but how events will probably transpire on Sunday night/Monday morning means I have little faith in me being in SW6 for kick off. It's on tele so I'll probably watch it dying in my bed.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:37, Reply)
Are you ill, or are you expecting a big night out?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:47, Reply)
The latter.
It could be amazing, it could be alright, it could be shit. I dunno, I'm quite looking forward to it.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:57, Reply)
Come on Jeff, it's always the latter with Baz

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains spank me like a disobedient avocado, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
I know Lighty.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
I've been to watch the match,
come home for some food, and now I'm off out again.

See ya, losers.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad STOP BEING SO REASONABLE!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:12, Reply)
^ Check out employed boy suddenly being a man-about-town.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:13, Reply)
Oh yeah.
Actually I'm hoping to see a mate who's 50 today. I'll be seeing him on Sunday, although he doesn't know it yet as it's a surprise party. Trouble is him and his missus are at an all day blues gig and we can't get through to them. So we hope to bump into them at their regular after the gig finishes.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad STOP BEING SO REASONABLE!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:16, Reply)
Any excuse to go to a pub, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
Yup.
I'm off now. Wooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad STOP BEING SO REASONABLE!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:18, Reply)
So did everyone go out with DG then?
In other news I've got another beer and could easily spend a lot of money on records. All donations gratefully received.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 21:53, Reply)
I have just got myself a beer Tangles.
Would you believe it.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:00, Reply)
Bank holiday madness, right here

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:01, Reply)
First sign of Madness...
Suggs walking up your driveway.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:05, Reply)
So do you want to buy me some records then, Jeff?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:08, Reply)
Why I'd love to spend several grand on records for you Tangles.
Nothing would give me more pleasure.

Well, actually, lots of things would. So on reflection... Sorry Tangles, I'll have to pass.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:10, Reply)
I'm not asking for several grand
Individually these records cost £7.99 - £11.99, but I could easily drop 10+ into my shopping basket.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
And there in lies the issue Tangles.
It would be cheaper for you to collect football stickers.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
No one to swap with :(

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:20, Reply)
I'll buy you this if you can find it on 12" so I can buy it too
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmxaeoz4BjI
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:12, Reply)
Oh Barry, when will I learn not to click your really bent links?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
Never
This has been rinsed for the past week whilst the weather was nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=p985VoXNuqM
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
This more actually
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tElEphEIuaw
It's not camp disco this time I swear, it's a recent banging tune.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
That is not a banging tune.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:51, Reply)
How about the album version?
www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Kashif-S-T-205-347-German-LP-1st-Press-1983-Arista-/370557523988?pt=UK_Records&hash=item5646f31814#ht_2136wt_958
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:19, Reply)
i ate some rice pudding and now I feel a bit sick

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:12, Reply)
I can't remember the last time I had rice pudding.
I think I've got mild Ambrosia.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:13, Reply)
i remember the last time you told that joke
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1480787

edit: also, b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1028922
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:30, Reply)
I don't.
I think I've got mild Ambrosia.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
wait, here's another
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post970124
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
Nope
On the sofa, binge drinking after a day of housework. Will most likely do this for the next three days.

Sigh.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:09, Reply)
BERT!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)
Bert yourself!

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
Who were you before you fucked off?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
I'd rather not say.
I got put on lists and crap :-)

I didn't involve myself in the talkboards before as frankly I was too scared. Have braved it tonight as I have had an entire bottle of wine.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:20, Reply)
Well that makes it more interesting.
What lists are we talking about here?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:21, Reply)
I'm guessing AB's fail archive

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:23, Reply)
Of course.
Well isn't that most people?

Although saying that, the return of 'Call Me Mistress' does seem to coincide with the release of Shannon Matthews mother - and she's probably on a list/register these days. So it might be her.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:24, Reply)
Haha

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
Damn.
You got me.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
A list compiled by a certain scary member.
I think I had posted about my boobs or something and was deemed an attention seeker. Twas long ago and I have been a lurker ever since.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:23, Reply)
So, boobs you say....

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Yep.
Two. As is the standard.

I don't want to end up on the list of doom again though...
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
Well we're all lovely here.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
Ahh good :)

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:29, Reply)
How long were you gone for?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:30, Reply)
Oh gawd I dont remember exactly.
Ages. I got all upset and silly :)
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
Did you lock a small person in the space under a bed?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)
This, from a man whose name indicates he molests canines.

(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
*sobs*
How are you Noel?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
Meh.
But I'm playing guitar at an acoustic night and meeting a girl next week, on the same night.
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)
Do you play in a band, or just for pleasure?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Pleasure mostly, I'm collaborating with one of my closest friends for a gig at the end of April in Portsmouth for a birthday party.
Partly shitting myself about it, partly just relying on my inner smug guitarist.
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)
Are you singing as well?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)
Yup, not entirely sure which song I'm gonna do yet but it'll be the first time I've played in front of more than a couple of people in twenty years.

(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Wow.
That's exciting (but I'm guessing you're shitting yourself).

How many folk do you expect to be there?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
Probably 30+
and a girl I've not seen in six or seven years. There was definitely a spark back then, but she was seeing a mutual friend. We'll see, it'll be a fun night.
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:26, Reply)
Shhh Jeff's on the pull
Don't cramp his style.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)
I hardly think suggesting a newb' is the mother of Shannon Matthews is classic 'pull' technique.
But if it works......
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)
You've been out of the game for too long...

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Unless she changes her name to "Call Me Princess" I don't think he's in with a chance.

(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
I've been single for so long
Frankly anything with a pulse has a chance.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
You'll fit right in here.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)
Excellent!

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)
My 2nd car was called Jeff.
Only I spelt it Geoff.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Did it fuck dogs?
(I'll accept 'came off better in a low-speed accident with a Rover).
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)
Sadly no.
It was just a simple metro.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
a ROVER Metro.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)
There are no scary members here
Only harmless nerds.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Well, I hope so.
Taking a giant leap of faith by chatting on here. Very scared!
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
As long as you can cope with being called a bender
And the occasional accusation of being Bert, you'll be fine.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
So says the most bent of all the benders.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:30, Reply)
I thought I was Bert?
It's all so confusing
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
I will take bender as a compliment.
And I am not even sure what bert is exactly. But again, I will assume it is a term of affection.

Be gentle with me, I am on pills for my nerves.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:30, Reply)
Thank you for being nice to me everyone.
I need a bit of nice in my life at the moment - so thank you xxx
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:44, Reply)
Bender.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:44, Reply)
Awww thanks xx

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:45, Reply)
Fuck off Bert

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)
Responding with love x

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)
I like breasts.

(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Broadsword?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
Yeah, thanks, I grew it myself.

(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
I meant to say to you
that photo you took by the Angel of teh North is fucking excellent. i loved it.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:30, Reply)
Thank you my dear.
I've been lax with the camera recently, shit's been up. How're you?
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
Yeah, not bad, ta.
I don't feel my pictures have been up to much cop recently though. I really haven't been getting out with the camera enough, and the shots I'm grabbing are starting to show it.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
Just take it EVERYWHERE
and every time you see something that moves you, shoot it.
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
I haven't got a sofa.
Is this going to be a problem?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:24, Reply)
It's all over b3th.
We can't be friends unless you've got a sofa.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Fuck.
We threw it out a couple of years ago because it broke. We have an armchair each, including the dog.
If any guests come, one of us has to sit on the floor.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
You sofa broke... Was Stunned Poster involved?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:29, Reply)
Yeah.
He kicked it in disgust when he realised he couldn't climb up onto it.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Stunned has previous for sofa damage.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
Twice, wasn't it?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
Once, Twice, three time a settee.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
Hang on
I'm thinking of Battered, aren't I? Stunned poster isn't a shortarse.
Thus rendering my joke shit.

*deletes account*
*kills self*
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:47, Reply)
Never mind.
You'll meet Stunned at JeffSTOCK.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:49, Reply)
I can barely wait.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:54, Reply)
I almost believe you.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:55, Reply)
Would it help if I did a happy 'can't wait' dance?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:00, Reply)
I don't want you getting over excited and making yourself ill before the big day.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)
alright Bertoids?
I made Mexican lasagne for din dins and am now polishing off an auchentoshan.

Thus is how it feels to be the best looking man on OT.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)
It's all about the 'short' with you innit!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-fX0UbpZls&ob=av2e
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:50, Reply)
yo tangles
I am very fucking far from being a harmless nerd.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:55, Reply)
Perhaps
But the person you are most likely to harm is yourself.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)
I am hardly likely to serial kill myself, am I?
Before you took part and were only lurking, who was your favourite OTer?
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:00, Reply)
I love you all equally

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:05, Reply)
I am the only one with a Ted Bundy fixation.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:07, Reply)
And he was the star of 'Married With Children', yes?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:08, Reply)
No.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
:-(

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
That was Christina Applegate's tits.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
She was lovely in that.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
Didn't she have them removed?
4EVA IN R HARTZ
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:11, Reply)
Say it ain't so.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
She had cancer, or something

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:17, Reply)
That's a shame.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
you are that chubby ginger chick AICMFP.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)
What, swipe?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)
You'll be meeting her as well.
*Remembers to take paddling pool full of wet mud*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:02, Reply)
Swipe is neither a chubbo nor a baked bean head.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:02, Reply)
She told us the other day she was tarred with the rusty brush

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:04, Reply)
My sideburns are gingerish.
That don't make me no ranga.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
They'd probably be darker if tehy were further away from the ground.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)
hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)
Chicks dig my sideburns.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
Is it true that chicks also 'dig' the fact you seem to be standing in a hole?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:12, Reply)
Of course not.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Goonies lols

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Right, I have about 25 minutes before my sleeping pill kicks in...
So I could do with a little light entertainment in the meantime. What do I need to know about this place?
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:05, Reply)
Everyone is a bender. But not really.
All newbies will be accused of being Bert until the point of acceptance.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
Oh, and Dozer has stolen the 'shortest man on OT' crown from Battered by half an inch.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:07, Reply)
Everyone's bent.
Nobody is cool except Monty.
All the girls are attention seekers.
anybody new is either bert or roger. Or freefair.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:08, Reply)
I'm cool.
I got a special note from Monty to confirm it.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)
I heard he called you 'fucking shit'

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)
He pines for me if I don't text him every couple of days.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
We all do.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:13, Reply)
Well, there isn't enough of me to go around.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
Not now taht you're in training, anyway.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
Innit.
I'm half the man I was. Which isn't saying a lot.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
I've lost ten pounds.
I'm quite excited by this.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
I'll bet that was trying to grab a cuddly toy on the pier.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
ha ha.
Only two stone to go and I'm back down to normal size.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:22, Reply)
How have you lost the weight?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:24, Reply)
weightwatchers.
Me and his lordship are doing it together.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:26, Reply)
I'm sure he loves you all the more for this.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:27, Reply)
It was his idea!

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:28, Reply)
Anything to stop you spending money in that ice-cream shop by the pier, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:30, Reply)
I've only ever been there once!

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:32, Reply)
+ a day for years.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:33, Reply)
: (

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:33, Reply)
You know I'm pulling your leg!
Only two weeks to go!

Is Mr B3th as excited as you?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:35, Reply)
Not so much, no.
In fact, he'll probably refuse to get out of the car.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:36, Reply)
Tell him I'll buy him a drink.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:42, Reply)
I shall tell him.
You can share stories about how shit I am at getting jobs.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:48, Reply)
Is there anyone or anything that Boyce hasn't called "fucking shit"?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue is your clam in a jam?, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:13, Reply)
Lusty?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
me.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
Only me.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
I see.
Will I be accepted quicker if I just admit I'm an attention seeking Bert?
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
No.
You need to get involved, expect a bit of abuse and contribute.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:11, Reply)
Righty ho.
I shall attempt this then :-)
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Roll with the punches.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
Is it Bella?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:20, Reply)
I'm not Bella.

(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:20, Reply)
SNUGGLESACKS

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney Nyommy beaver anal glands nyomnyomnyom, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:49, Reply)
ello

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:50, Reply)
Kroney is more excited about meeting you than he is about his own birthday.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:52, Reply)
I should think so too

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:53, Reply)
All I get at the moment is gazzed messages and people saying, 'I can't wait to meet b3th'.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:57, Reply)
*sarcasm meter explodes*

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)
Seriously.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
: p

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
I've got no idea who is actually going.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)

http://www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/24043

And every bastard one of them is looking forward to meeting me.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
What I mean, is that I don't Facebook.
So I've not ides who signed up, and who can't make it now.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
No-one's said anything to me on facebook about it.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
Have they blocked you?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Yeah.
They hate me.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
heh heh heh
It'll be a fun night out.

And you'll get so drunk you'll be sick all the way home.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
i really won't.

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
You'll be up to go to a car boot sale won't you.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
No, probably not.
i just don't drink that much. I'm really not that good at it.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
Well I'm sure someone will find you a drink you like.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:17, Reply)
I don't trust people who don't drink.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9CT738kfx8
(I helped save b3ta! Noely Noel heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil sig heil, Fri 6 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)
I'm moving over here

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
Me too,

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:27, Reply)
It's nice over here

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
It is that.
What are you doing tomorrow, honey?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:34, Reply)
Do you know, I have no idea.
I promised the boss I'd help him do some stuff on his eBay site, but apart from that, I don't think there's anything much going on.
I've got a lot of TV recorded on sky+, so I might watch some more of that.

What about you?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:36, Reply)
Rough plan.
Gym in the morning for half an hour, then off out to watch City lose to the Darth Benders and then going for a bite to eat and more drinks.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
You're playing the Florists tomorrow?
It's a battle of David versus ... david.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:40, Reply)
It's Bent vs. Bent.
However, I think he'll be the happier of the two come full time.

City are shocking.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:43, Reply)
Seeing as I support neither of these shit teams
I may well be happier than both of you.
is it on terrestrial?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:44, Reply)
It's on sky.
So you'll have to go to the pub to watch it. Or find a stream online.

Either way, two weeks from now, I expect City to be more than relegated. It has bearing on when I make it to JeffSTOCK. If we're down, I'll be there from lunchtime, if not, I'll go to the game and then go to the cider boat.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:47, Reply)
+ cry in your pint

(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:49, Reply)
I expect City to lose tomorrow
And then lose to Coventry and Monday. And THEN for Nicky Maynard to score a hatrick for West Ham a week on Tuesday and for City to go down.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:51, Reply)
I was quite entranced today by that bloke from West Ham's haircut.
It was epic.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:54, Reply)
Was it a cow-lick?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:58, Reply)
He had a mohican.
Vas Te, or something. Foreign looking johnny.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 0:59, Reply)
That doesn't sound like Stunned.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 1:03, Reply)
Is Stunned poster foreign?
That explains all the criminal damage to furniture.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Sat 7 Apr 2012, 1:06, Reply)

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