Evening!
Ow biss then me babbers?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:34, Reply)

A'ight.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:37, Reply)

Jah bless, mi knotty-headed 'nilla.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:38, Reply)

P to the D
WORD!
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:39, Reply)

Aight
Styles like Al Pacino
Reno until the parcelino
The mad dino with the bambino, the gambino
Digger than Jim Colisemo
More reservoir dogs than Tarantino
Scales for Venezuela, Brown as Ni O
Making the block hotter than Jalepe OS
G. Luciano
Be wettin' shit like Pesci in "Casino"
Fifty dollar cigar seer
The Bosnia, the mafia
Don P. like Garcia
Drug Czar and the baby-Pah beater
The M-8 behind the bar-freer
The poughkenoughs, the panama skier
Down with the parmesan
Ready to comb like Vietnam with arms
'Cause the hollow-points and phenomenon
The cheddar-spreader
The killer with the gold Carretta
N-Leader
The sweater-letter with the hollow letter
Drama-setter
The patmeretta gettin' redder kids and mamma
Shredder
Infra-red clow off the armour better
The godfather, the problem solver
Coming through with the 6 shell revolver
Hot as lava
Guns skills that reel and in the 'ville I be the barber
Gangster saga, the motha-fuckin' face carver

Drums of death hold your breath
Give you a dose of shit that's dope as soda
The underworld family cosa-nostra
Pearl-handle inside the shoulder-holster
G. Luciano with a click but nothin' but N-S & Chicanos
You get hit up like Castrelano
italiano like crime familia
N- don't get familiar
Me and my goons might have to kill you
Up in New York
We play bloodsports at home court
And hold down forts
Soon as ya caught, get your dome torched
G Rap and Dj Shadow leave your bone squashed
Squeeze the chrome short, take no shorts
We judge and jury in the home court
Give you the clown corpse dead on the sidewalk
Surrounded by mad pedefors
Your whole frame laid in the white chalk
You got the smoking section
First-class tickets to resurrection
Forever destined to a place where N-S never rest in
Headed in hell's direction
Lost at the crossroads and intersection
Should've wore a vest for chest protection
Slug fill you to capacity, someone at the dance
Someone with the hand velocity of Butch Cassidy
Bitch Nigga with the audacity to blasphemy
Got yourself caught in a motha-fuckin' tragedy.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:44, Reply)

Colisemo Bowen
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:45, Reply)

Somewhere in space, this may all be happening right now...

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:53, Reply)

Wotcha berk.
How the devil are you?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:39, Reply)

Tired mainly
stupid body and it's refusal to sleep. Work is less mental though. How about you?
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:40, Reply)

Work is manic
And I've been offered a 9 month extension, so that isn't too bad.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:41, Reply)

I thought that ship was sinking?
so to speak. Or is it sorted out now?
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:43, Reply)

Oh, it is.
But they've offered me an extension anyway.

I'm considering my options.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:44, Reply)

Nine months of guaranteed work, I suppose
I guess you have to balance that with how it might look on your CV if the project goes tits up, and the hassle of finding something new.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:46, Reply)

Exactly.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:47, Reply)

I'm fine thanks Jeffers
My train gets into Bristol 1t a 13:14 next Saturday. What time does the drinking start?
( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:38, Reply)

Wednesday.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:38, Reply)

Haha, class.

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:40, Reply)

By Wednesday, I obviously meant 'yesterday'.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:41, Reply)

This is a really good question actually
I had planned to get there early afternoon and have a good mooch, but I have no idea what time I'm supposed to be/other people are getting to the pub for.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:39, Reply)

Oddly. I just asked the 'what time are you all getting there' question on the calendar.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:41, Reply)

What time are people getting there?

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:41, Reply)

I dunno.
Thus why the question was raised.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:42, Reply)

I think Stunned was going to get there about early afternoon too.
In passing, we had mentioned going on the Great Britain.
( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:44, Reply)

Don't bother. It's shit*
*Actually, it's meant to be quite interesting, but surely there are better things to do.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:44, Reply)

Cough Cabot circus cough
I've not been to Brizzle since it was finished.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:46, Reply)

Now that REALLY is shit.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:48, Reply)

Says you who goes out clothes shopping more often than I do?

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:56, Reply)

But I keep losing weight.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:03, Reply)

I was planning on getting in about lunch time
and having a quick scoot round Cabot Circus. I don't get in to Bristol very often, so I like to have a shop when I can.

I can meet you at the station if you like - anyone else who fancies it can come along too.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:49, Reply)

If you are meeting anyone at the station who you've not met before.
Send them a text saying you're a black dude with natty dreads. Trust me, it's funny as fuck.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

You'd have to be *really* stupid to fall for that...

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

I know what b3th looks like
facebook innit. And thankyou b3th for your kind offer, I'm not sure what I'm doing yet or who I'm meeting up with but I shall surely let you know :)
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:55, Reply)

*reads*
I'd rather do my own thing
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:56, Reply)

Not at all!
I would have said that if that were the case.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:57, Reply)

heh
In the market for anything in particular?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:00, Reply)

I can take her to Ann Summers
She can upgrade her average sized boyfriend.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:04, Reply)

Slightly under average actually
but the ones in Ann Summers scare me.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:09, Reply)

My friend and I got told off for taking photos in there.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:10, Reply)

I saw numerous ads in Amsterdam
for a company that were much more, erm, aesthetically pleasing. If I were in the market for one (and could remember the name of the bloody company) I'd get one of those.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:21, Reply)

Well, I'm going round the shops anyway
so if anybody wants to join me, they're welcome.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:57, Reply)

Cabot Circus isn't very good.
If they haven't got what you want in the first shop, they won't have it in any of the others as they all sell the same things.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:58, Reply)

I know.
But they have the Debenhams for my make up, and the Thomas Sabo shop so I can get a new charm for my bracelet.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:59, Reply)

Well, let's home they have a blue cross sale on and you can save a few quid.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:00, Reply)

The make up is a concession stand, so it's not usually included in blue cross sales.
Only other place I can get it is John Lewis at Cribbs, too. Stupid exclusive make up.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:03, Reply)

Why do you wear make up and perfume?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:04, Reply)

Because I'm repulsive without them.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:05, Reply)

LIES

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:06, Reply)

Sadly not.
You did see my facebook status yesterday, didn't you? That was based on me not wearing make up.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:07, Reply)

Ouch
I'm sure it's not true, though.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:11, Reply)

I was expecting the standard reply of 'because women are ugly and they smell'
Sorry - I didn't mean 'you' I meant 'wimmin' in general.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:07, Reply)

You've met me.
You know the truth.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:09, Reply)

It's nice to have a mooch though
particularly if you don't get to go often. Oxford's shit for shopping.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:00, Reply)

OI

( The Light in Chains spank me like a disobedient avocado, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:07, Reply)

:-)

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:07, Reply)

More drinking?

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:47, Reply)

You could take the girls shopping.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

Yeah, if there is no culture, I'll do that.

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:53, Reply)

We've got loads of culture. I'll link you some options.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:55, Reply)

Here you go.
visitbristol.co.uk/things-to-do
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:55, Reply)

I fancy the Arnolfini
It depends on the weather. I was hoping to have a trip on the water taxi.
( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:59, Reply)

The water taxi is quite good.
You can go to The Cottage, The Nova and The Pumphouse.

A mini pub crawl.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:01, Reply)

I like it when a plan comes together

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:03, Reply)

All three pubs will be quite busy in the run up to kick off.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:05, Reply)

www.bristolferry.com/
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:03, Reply)

I can get there whenever I like
yay for cars and bashes that aren't miles away
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:48, Reply)

Hmm, I've just checked train times and prices.
Cheapest I could get would be £59 each there, £58 each back, that's before finding a hotel. So it looks unlikely that we'll be coming, even with the recent job offer.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:46, Reply)

That's a real bloody shame
which job were you offered, and are you taking it?
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:47, Reply)

One I was interviewed for in January and didn't get at the time.
They rang me last Thursday and asked if I was still interested and I said yes. Only until end of May initially, probable extension to September and, hopefully, permanent after that.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:50, Reply)

Better than bugger all, I guess
what will you be doing?
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:52, Reply)

Grant work for the Big Lottery Fund.

( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:53, Reply)

Oh I vaguely remember you saying about that
was it one you particularly wanted/will look good on your CV or is it just a gapfiller til you find something better?
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

I really fancied the job at the time and still do.
I reckon it'll be interesting.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:39, Reply)

EasyJet will fly you down on
Saturday morning for £34.99 and take you home Sunday evening for £39.99*

*No idea if that includes tax/extras or not.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:50, Reply)

*rubs chin*
I'd forgotten about SqueezyJet, although there's still taxes, transport from airport etc to factor in. I shall discuss with the missus, whom I'm about to go and pick up.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

If you can't make it, then worry ye not.
I'm sure Monty and Stunned are going to have another night in September.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:52, Reply)

Been on a groove hunt
Came up trumps: youtu.be/SxnUs020r6A
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:46, Reply)

Barry, I'm going to ask you a serious question here, and I want you to answer it honestly:
Are you in fact a cloth-eared quender?
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:52, Reply)

I'm worried, Jeff.
What if it doesn't stop fucking raining by next Saturday? What then, eh?
I'm only going to be wearing converse type shoes.

Well, not *only* those, but you know what I mean.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

I'm going to wear a dress
bollocks to the weather.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:53, Reply)

Me too.
My bollocks will then know all about the weather.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

Good grief, are you coming down for it?

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:58, Reply)

No.
Should I?

Not after I got described as 'like a skinny Jimmy Carr'.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:01, Reply)

I think you should.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:02, Reply)

Again,
Not after I got described as 'like a skinny Jimmy Carr'.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:03, Reply)

Who called you that?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:04, Reply)

^she did.
:'(
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:05, Reply)

Take no notice of the nasty lady.
You might enjoy yourself.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:06, Reply)

Yeah
just let the nasty words go over your head.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:08, Reply)

:'(

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:09, Reply)

b3th.
Behave yourself. If Dozer comes along all of the beautiful people will come out as well, just to be associated with such a good looking example of a man.

We'll be cool by association.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:10, Reply)

i was being nice!!!!!!!
*huffs*
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:11, Reply)

Um, cooler.
Not cool.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:11, Reply)

It might be warm.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:14, Reply)

You'd be better keeping your bollocks hidden. Especially round this lot.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

It might be a bit nippy.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

Well wear different shoes.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

You're not the boss of me!
Also, change your sig.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:55, Reply)

Proper lol.
When's pay day then?
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:57, Reply)

Pfft.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:59, Reply)

All good.
Person offered the job to be my new PA at work has accepted the job and starts on Monday. This will make life considerably easier.
( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:51, Reply)

Good work.
Did you hire her because she is has outstanding PMO skills or because of her diary management skills, or just because she is quite pretty and has great tits?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

I predict tits.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 18:54, Reply)

Skills and the ability to keep me in line and manage me.
I have done the whole "poke the payroll" thing in the past and had my fingers burned. Am enjoying this job too much to want to fuck it up, particularly as I am hoping for a contract extension. Plus my wife's tits are awesome so they do me very nicely.
( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:06, Reply)

I'm interested to know how you managed to get cystitis of the fingers.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:09, Reply)

Tell me, everyone...
....if you have your dream job*, and then some new people come in and your dream job is still your dream job, but its turning into your OK job and looking eventually to be your nightmare job, what would you do?

I really don't like my new manager, everyone thinks he's a cock, he's just not compatible with the team. I'm very needy and need to be told stuff I do "rocks", "is awesome" or "Holy shit"... I'll even accept "OK", "That Sucks", "You're Shit" or "What the fuck do you think you were doing?".

What I don't like to hear is "Why didn't you run this by me first? If you have time to do that, then you have time to do this. When you updated the the system last week and it broke it took us 3 hours to fix it"... espech when I would have fixed it in about 20 minutes if they just let me debug it rather than having to explain every 10 seconds what I'm debugging and having to explain the entire layout engine which was entirely irrelivent, and then I told them what code to change to fix it.

I got no problem with saying what I've done is shit, what I do have a problem with is someone saying they don't have confidance in me to do the job. My little crazy ideas last week saved someone having to manually enter 5k lines into a database one by one. My little crazy idea the week before resulted in a competition on the site go from 6 enteries in week 1 (with lots of "WHY ISNT ANYONE ENTERING???") to 60 enteries in week 3 PLUS some of them getting over 100 likes on Facebook. My little crazy ideas, pretty much once every couple of days someone comes across something they can't eaither stops them doing their job or makes their job a lot LOT longer/harder.

RANT RANT RANT.


* in everything but pay.
( Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:26, Reply)

Once you launch your super app
you can tell them to shove their job conditions up their arses.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:29, Reply)

I got a thinggy that I know will sale well, it's not packaged or designed in a way that I could release it into the wilds, but it would only take a week to do that.
It's a plug-in for Wordpress that allows for the "Read on...." "Commented on..." and whatever action I want (that facebook allows). As far as I can see, and I've looked, I'm the first to do this successfully to the point of it being in a public working site.
( Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:35, Reply)

Just remember us when you're richer than Bill Gates.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:36, Reply)

Haha, I don't think I could forget ,)

( Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:03, Reply)

Document what you've achieved over and above what you core tasks are.
Pointing out the benefits to the company.

Might be worth speaking with your senior manager and asking if you can work without supervision or if your reporting line can be changed as it is becoming increasingly clear that your current manager doesn't like the work you're producing, but your previous manager was very happy with it.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:30, Reply)

I think I did something very telling today.
I was supposed to have a review today with the big huncho, but he was out of his office. I then saw him at the end of the day and he appologised, so I asked if I could reschedual for next week, and he said yes. Big huncho said "I'll bring [new manager] in on it" and I said "Maybe if it's possible to have him there for half the time?" and he smiled, winked and said 'no problem'. I'm such a sucker for a smile and wink.
( Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:33, Reply)

My new boss is ace.
And I would.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:33, Reply)

My new boss is a bender.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:34, Reply)

How long have you been in the employment of PD?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:36, Reply)

I have strong EMO skills, not PMO skills.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:37, Reply)

What about PMT skills?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:39, Reply)

Just think yourself lucky you'll never have to find out.
I'm a fucking nightmare.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:39, Reply)

Write rude stuff about him in Permanent marker on the bog door

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:34, Reply)

They'll know it was him.
I can't imagine anyone spends more time in the office traps than Gonz.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:37, Reply)

If it's spelled right, he'll get away with it.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:37, Reply)

good point Jeffers, come to think of it 'Mike fcukd his dad lst nite' might give the game away

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:39, Reply)

If he does that, he could sell the idea to Battered
who'd probably launch a international marketing campaign for French Connection.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:40, Reply)

Funnily enough they were a client of ours before I sold the company.
We told them that the whole FCUK thing was outdated, chavvy and made new young consumers dismiss the brand.
( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:46, Reply)

Sounds a lot like OT

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:47, Reply)

Ha ha. POTD.

( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:48, Reply)

Are things really that bad around here?
I'm still annoyed that my 'Pay As You Grow' comment got the LOLZ it deserved.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:50, Reply)

I'm in marketing as well.
Whodathunkit? I specialise in marcomms though.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:25, Reply)

Haha, I remember when soemoen in primary school someone wrote some rude words on the blackboard...
... and they got the police in and did hand writting analysis. Now I'm 28, I call BULLSHIT. Ditto with fingerprints and the fire alarm.
( Ain't no 'igger like Gonz the J-'igger LETS GO GOBBO LETS GO !, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:04, Reply)

This is why i work for myself.
Even though I'm a cunt it's all better this way.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:25, Reply)

I see Mel Gibson's up to his old tricks again.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:50, Reply)

It's all right.
It's okay. Doesn't really matter if he's old and grey.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:52, Reply)

Your earworms cannot harm me!
I have a Danse Macabre shield in my head right now.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 19:55, Reply)

best internet
www.briansewell.co.uk/brian-sewell-written-word/brian-sewell-soundboards.html
(PsychoChomp I want to more creative in a buisness kinda way., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:13, Reply)

Looks like car is dead. FFS I loved Monty the Mondeo.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:14, Reply)

You've not had it that long.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:15, Reply)

Just over a year, I'm gutted really I took care of this one and it fucking died anyway. Looking at a Skoda at the weekend. I will call it Seve.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:26, Reply)

Took care of it by driving to Bristol from Wales when spannered......

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:51, Reply)

d the mondeo
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:16, Reply)

What a bender eh.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:17, Reply)

You've had a Mondeo call Monty.
I think you should get a Jaguar called Jeff next.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:19, Reply)

He can work up to the beamer called b3th.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:27, Reply)

Right!
To the exercise shop.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 20:26, Reply)

Holy crap
naked Alexander Skarsgard on my telly. Awesome.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)

Oh god oh god oh god.
Only thing better would be naked Alexander Skarsgard in your room.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:18, Reply)

I genuinely don't know if I could deal with that though
I'd probably make a total, utter arse of myself.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:22, Reply)

Apaprently, since he's been single, he's been a total boy-slut.
*goes off to happy place*
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:24, Reply)

I rarely condone that sort of thing
but, oooo, mmmm.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:29, Reply)

^this

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:32, Reply)

Sam or Eric, though?

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:37, Reply)

Eric. And Spike.
But not Bill or Angel.
It would appear I like my vampires blond and fun.

Sam is a meh. As is Alcide. Too furry.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:40, Reply)

I always preferred Spike to Angel
Angel was such an emo moper. Sam is a biiiiiiiig yes, as is Alcide.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:42, Reply)

I've got no idea what you two are going on about.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:44, Reply)

Crappy american tv shows for teenage girls.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:48, Reply)

Bless.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:49, Reply)

You know those threads where you boys talk about which 'starlet' would 'get it'?
This is the girly equivalent.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:52, Reply)

You want to kick some poor blokes back doors in.
Ooh-err matron!
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:53, Reply)

How was the gym?
Are you 'buff'?
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)

I don't do weights.
I just have a bit of a cycle, or a bit of a jog.

This evening, I had a cycle and watched the darts.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:56, Reply)

I just dun a loltastic reply to QOTW.
No tramp murdering, corpse viewing or encounters with TV's Paul Ross this time.

You should all be very relieved.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:24, Reply)

Mine is better.

( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:34, Reply)

linkypoos?

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:35, Reply)

It's one word.
Apeloverage.
( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:39, Reply)

I thought it best not to directly pick on or belittle a fellow site user.
At least on the main QOTW.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:42, Reply)

He is an exception to that rule.

( Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:46, Reply)

I suppose this makes me the bigger man.
Which, from what I've heard, and even for me, isn't saying much.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:49, Reply)

hahaha

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:51, Reply)

Bollocks.
I was going to go ahead and book for Jeffstock, but in the 90 minutes I was out of the house the fucking return train tickets have doubled in price. Checked out Easyjet and I'm fucked if I'm getting up at stupid o' clock on Sunday morning to get a flight back.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:53, Reply)

Save your beer tokens for a London bash if that's easier.
JeffStock is bound to be shit.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)

Well aren't you a little ray of sunshine.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:57, Reply)

I'm trying to stop DG from wasting money.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:58, Reply)

It had better not be shit
not if it's costing me god knows how much in train fare and hotels.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:01, Reply)

It'll be all kinds of awesome.
If it isn't, you can push Jeff off the boat.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:02, Reply)

I'll probably fall off/over anyway.
I can't seem to drink there without getting some sort of injury.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)

Flid

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:09, Reply)

And?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:12, Reply)

It won't be as big a waste of money as the time I decided to treat PD and Battered.
I shelled out and got them tickets to go to Alton Towers.

They were proper sad when they got there and found they were only tall enough to ride on the tea-cups.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)

Poor little buggers couldn't even see over the side of the log flume.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:10, Reply)

That ride has been renamed 'The Kroney'.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)

Hahahaha, oh grim.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:13, Reply)

How far from the airport is the city centre?

( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 21:59, Reply)

You can get a bus.
Hang on. I'll find out for you.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)

A tenner on the bus - return
https://flyer.bristolairport.co.uk/onlinebooking.php
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)

If anyone does go through the airport duty free shop, tell them I said hello.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)

That makes you sound like a prolific shoplifter.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:11, Reply)

Why do you think I don't work there any more?

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:13, Reply)

Because you were getting scared of the flying metal dragons that you kept seeing through the window.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)

THEY MOVE BY THEMSELVES!!!!!

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:19, Reply)

heh heh heh

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:20, Reply)

Cheers.
It appears we can fly back at 9.30pm on the Sunday, but we'd have to fly down on the Friday evening as the only 'plane on saturday morning is at 7am.
( Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)

This place in within walking distance of the cider boat/shops
www.rocknbowlmotel.com/rates.html

For a hostel, they appear to have private double/twin rooms with bathroom.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:10, Reply)

That's the spirit.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:00, Reply)

Have we all done Bertlols about this story?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-17690997
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:18, Reply)

Yes.
Here
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:20, Reply)

Of course.
How could I have missed that? I must be SHORT sighted.

lololololololololol
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)

ho ho ho

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)

OH LOL

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:23, Reply)

There there.
Don't cry.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)

I'll get over it SHORTly.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)

Seems that it's just you and Dozer.
Where is everyone?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)

berk's frigging herself senseless over Alexander Skarsgard
Dunno where everyone else is.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)

Ahem

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)

Finished?

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)

She won't answer.
She's gonna have a fag before breaking wind and then going straight to sleep.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:34, Reply)

I just wiped my cock on the curtains.

(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)

Or your 'curtain pole' as you know it.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)

I'm guessing they are all imagining they are Alexander Skargard.
Just to try ruin Berk's wank, she'll never get the imagine of everyone else out of her head.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)

I'm sure that wouldn't be enough to put me off

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)

You can prove it on the cider boat.
You can have a wank whilst we all annoy you.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)

If she can manage it then she's a lot more single minded than I am.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)

You'll find out in 9 days.

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)

Again?

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)

heh

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)

I'm here
but I have little to say
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)

Why so quiet Captain?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)

*shrugs*

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)

Do you have opinions on Alexander Skarsgard?

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)

If she googles him I'm sure she will

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)

i googled and I don't feel that strongly about him
you guys can have him
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)

not really

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)

Well.
What's up in Cavy Land then? All ready for back to school on Monday?
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)

I went in today for a few hours
probably will tomorrow, too. Got the marking out of the way, just the rest of the paperwork now.

I just bought a new run/cage thing for the pigs.
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)

I'll bet she hasn't done her homework
And her lunchbox (which is actually an empty 2 ltr ice-cream container) is still in her bag from before she broke up - and it's still got half a sandwich in it.
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)

Her lunch box is awesome.
It has a dinosaur on it.
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:47, Reply)

Does it have a matching thermos flask?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)

no, it's only a little one which just fits in a sandwich

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)

What happens if you fancy a sandwich, some crisps and a Trio.
Does your lunchbox cope?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:49, Reply)

the other things have to be loose in my bag
I live onthe edge
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:51, Reply)

Woo!
How is LARP-land going?
( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:53, Reply)

next event is about 3 weeks away
Firefly larp is months away, but I'm getting all excited about it already.
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:55, Reply)

Is Firefly the one wit the courtesan?
and the girl who was on Stargate Atlantis?
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:59, Reply)

there is a courtesan, yes
not sure which one was in stargate atlantis, though
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:59, Reply)

Short girl. Mechanic or something.

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)

Kaylee
didn't realise she was in SA
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:03, Reply)

I always have more homework to do

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)

Everything okay?

( JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)

yup

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)

Well, this is dull.
Shall we do an /ac subthread?
( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:56, Reply)

i don't have /ac on this computer
it was getting embarrassing
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)

I have no idea what that means.
But I've just got back from a mammoth port and cheese evening round my aunts with the famo. My family is ace.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)

awight lad?

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 22:58, Reply)

Very well ta.
I never thought I'd say this but I don't think I can drink any more port, I'm going to burst. What's going down?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:00, Reply)

Alexander Skarsgard

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)

I love cheese.
And whisky. And Fiona Bruce.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:05, Reply)

Camebert is my new favourite cheese.
Now I'm drinking Leffe and smoking Lucky Strikes whilst listening to SBTRKT, been a good day if I ignore the hassle with birdz.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:07, Reply)

I love pretty much all cheese.
But a good, well matured and runny camembert is wonderful.

Are you still dabbling in house?
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)

Course bruv
Came across this on my daily Youtube groove hunt today, it's mega; youtu.be/Jt1RiNZWnpY
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:11, Reply)

I like that.
DJ Sneak just mixed the latest Fabric comp. Straight up boompty house.

It is rather good.

HOUSE EDIT: You should also look out for Maya Jane Coles and Lord of the Isles on your tune hunts.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:13, Reply)

I've found a Dmitri from Paris mix that's amazing.
But it's on Spotify and just says Dmitri Mix so I have no idea where it's from or what it is, and more annoyingly I can't find a tracklist. There are some absolute bangers on it.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:23, Reply)

You should get on to FACT and Resident Adviser.
Loads of podcasts and mixes.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:25, Reply)

Resident Adviser is bare cliquey though fam.
I'm onto Dmitri's essential mix now, tasty stuff.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:27, Reply)

Resident Adviser isn't that cliquey.
Just ultra knowledgeable.
(DOZERTRON! Baseball!, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)

I believe you have to call it cannonbear these days

( b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:17, Reply)

Anyone still up?
I just got in.
( tangledupinblue Your beat kicks back like death, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:46, Reply)

I'll sleep when I'm dead.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:49, Reply)

Good man
It's the only way.
Where've you been tonight?
( tangledupinblue Your beat kicks back like death, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:50, Reply)

Round my aunt's.
For a belated birthday do with the whole family. I am full to the brim with port and cheese, I had a lovely time. What's kept you out til the wee hours?
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 23:54, Reply)

Just been to see the most amazing band - Volcano the Bear
Words cannot describe how impressive they are to watch.
This is the second time I've seen them and both times rank amongst the best gigs I've ever been to
( tangledupinblue Your beat kicks back like death, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 0:00, Reply)