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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 799, 798, 797, 796, 795, ... 1

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I will start a new thread then.
Because I can.

I am a mighty powerful inferno of TD. I am the sun, and the moon.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:04, Reply)
And your indifference is of no consequence to me.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
Evening TD
I've just got in and I'm a bit pissed.
Luckily I have food.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:12, Reply)
i'm not pissed but I feel I should be

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:13, Reply)
I feel you should be as well.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:17, Reply)
I've been to a beer festival
At some point in the evening I switched to thirds of a pint, thinking it would be a sensible sober thing to do, but it just meant that I drank quicker and went back for more sooner.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
If you're not a scooper
Stick with what you like.

I do a lot of beer festivals with friends who want to trainspot every beer.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:21, Reply)
After a while, you stop tasting any difference anyway.
Isn't that one of the reasons wine tasters spit?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:22, Reply)
I fell foul of this a little
I should have been increasing in strengths and flavours through the night.
There were a couple that I was indifferent to, which had I tried first I probably would hve liked a lot more.
Once I realised this I moved onto stronger flavours.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:27, Reply)
I'm not a trainspotter
But I do like to try new things.
There we a lot of beers that I have had previously in bottles, of which I was tempted to try the cask versions. But I stuck to beers I had never tried before instead.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:24, Reply)
I like light beer so I tend to find one I like and stick on it.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:28, Reply)
Variety is the spice of life, TD.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:31, Reply)
I'll try a few
But beer-fests are a bit difficult for a huntin'shootin'fishin' type like me.

*No animals are harmed in my efforts to integrate with the middle class*.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:39, Reply)
yum beer festival

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:21, Reply)
You've all gone to bed haven't you?
I was trying to make a big Anthony Gormley stylee statement.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:13, Reply)
Have you got all of us on ignore?

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
No - I'm just very slow.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:22, Reply)
Perfectly acceptable

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:25, Reply)
I'm here!
The party can start!
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:14, Reply)
+ lemon

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
Only one old man in this house

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
Sorry - got distracted by putting flea drops on the cats.
Where the hell does life take you?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
Down the shitter

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
If you want
You could see it as a unique sewerage experience.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:25, Reply)
Don't worry kids.
I'm back.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:46, Reply)
Thank fuck for that!

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:46, Reply)
Alright Tangles.
Now. Be honest, have you tried to get away from parenting duties and have a weekend away next week? You know JeffSTOCK makes sense.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:51, Reply)
It makes perfect sense to me
However Mrs Upinblue has already arranged for us to be in Borth that weekend.
Apparently I have to go too.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:53, Reply)
Try and be free to meet your imaginary friends in Sept.
Stunned and Monty often throw something then.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:54, Reply)
I shall work on it.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:56, Reply)
I can imagine the conversation...
'Sorry love, I won't be about to love my kids this weekend, a load of benders, who happen to call me a bender, are having a party... I'll be back in time for the Antiques Roadshow!'
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)
"How do I know them? Well, you know when I'm supposed to be working..."

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:00, Reply)
hahahaha
You really should try and make one.

You'll fit right in.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
That's what I called my wedding

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:00, Reply)
I thought your husband nonced you?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)
According to my dad
he never stood a chance.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
hahaha

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
Just signed off Jeff.
Take the crown of tedium.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:50, Reply)
Oh thank god.
Wassup then blud?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:51, Reply)
Workin' like dog for the boss man.
Workin' for the company, ooh, yeah!

Any feedback from the telephone interview?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:51, Reply)
Not as yet.
Hopefully some time next week.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:52, Reply)
Well my fingers are crossed.
Any other irons in the fire?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:54, Reply)
A few.
It's been a few days though, and I haven't heard anything, so it's probably not going to be good news.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)
Keep plugging away.
DG has only just hit his goal.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)
Too fucking true.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
I can't afford to hang on much longer : (

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)
Excited?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)
Stupidly so.
I can't wait to get up at arse o' clock on Monday to go to work.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
Good stuff.
Hadd'a'way'n shite, ya bastard!

Or whatever it is you people say to one another.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
I really am looking forward to it.
I just wish it was permanent.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
Gotta start somewhere.
Recruitment has changed a lot in recent years. People who are recruiting want cheap lighters, not Zippos.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Nice analogy.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
I'd still appreciate some CV advice.
My days are gonna be even more intense as I'll still be trawling jobsites when I get home at night.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
Nee bovver son!
I'll get some stuff sorted out for ya over the next week. I've said I'll help* Lusty too.

Just trying to find time to do it properly. Also, worth referencing what I might suggest against what Bob thinks - before going back to Student Land, he was in recruitment.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
So he was.
I'll bear that in mind.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
I will get stuff sorted for you though.
I said I would.

I'm looking forward to meeting you!
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:19, Reply)
I'm looking forward to you meeting me too.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)
You bender.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:22, Reply)
No, YOU bender, etc.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
YOU BENDER
no returns
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
Something about coal in the bath

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
Has you whippet run away?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
One ont cross beam's gone owt askew ont treddle

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
Something about a pigeon?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
I'm late in joining everyone in congratulating you
But well done anyway, Davvo.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
Cheers, tangles.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
All yours if you want it.
Bedtime for me.

x
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:48, Reply)
Good day today.
New leather A2 bomber, new shades and shenanigans planned on Sunday. Wagwan folks?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:56, Reply)
I wish you were a girl
so I could raid your enormous wardrobe.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:57, Reply)
He's too skinny


*runs*
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)
I bought a pair of 30" jeans today, they were too small :(
I always said the day I can't fit into 30 waist jeans is the day I'd kill myself/lose weight, but I'm too lazy to do either.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:59, Reply)
I used to say that about 32" jeans :(

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
I mean I could wear them, they do up fine.
Just a tad too tight. In fact fuck it I am gonna slim down, you heard it here first.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)
At your age I could get away with 28"
Now 32" is more realistic
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:02, Reply)
I've got from a 36" back to a 32/34"
The power of exercise.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
I was a 28" until I was about 25.
*weeps*
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
It's alright, I'm got health problems.
I should be a 42" waist.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
How long has that taken/how much do you exercise?
I really, really need to get back into shape but I'm finding it so hard to get motivated.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
I tend to just go to the gym to watch the darts on the telly.
I do LESS than an hour a week of cross-trainer/cycling.

But I quite enjoy it. I've not really adjusted my diet at all. I was buying 'large' but sometimes I needed 'extra large' and that limits where you can buy things, so I exercised.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
See I used to do a five mile run a day
I got burned out quite quickly.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:13, Reply)
I don't think you need to do a lot.
I just think it has to be 'enough' to get your heart racing and a line of sweat down your back, and to do it often enough.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:17, Reply)
See, I wanted to take the pooch for a walk today
and I did something to the top of my right thigh which meant every step I took clicked and pulled and it was a bit shit so I didn't get out. It was complete agony and I felt my age.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
+Rachel Riley was wearing something new on Countdown

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
I was a tight 36" and I exercised hard for a couple of years
to become a loose 36"/tight 34"
Then I stopped exercising and didn't get any fatter.

Suck it up and put the time in, B-Man.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
Oh, fuck you, bitch!
You're going on the list.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
You only wish Baz was a girl so you could lez him up.

(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:59, Reply)
You are pissed
and so am I
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
How is MK this fine evening?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
It shines like a beacon in this fetid land
I'm watching Bad Boys and drinking JD and cuke, one is necessary for t'other.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
Fuck that, aged JD is a lovely drink.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
I'm so poor at the moment I'm lucky I'm not swigging Frosty Jack
JD is a luxury
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)
Coke is the worst mixer ever, though.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Not with acid is isn't..

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
One is hardly discerning on acid
I've drunk ketchup whilst tripping before.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:17, Reply)
Lots.....
Or was it just a micro-dot?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)
Evening Chompy

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
Evening Tango
How's tricks?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
Pleasantly drunk here

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)
Sounds good to me
Marry, shag, kill:

Victoria Beckham
Coleen Rooney
Katie Price

Hmm?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)

Marry Rooney
Shag Beckham
Kill Price

Same to you

Holly Willougby
Fearne Cotton
Lauren LaVerne
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
I'll have a go.
Marry - LaVerne
Shag - Willoughby
Kill - Cotton (only because she'll be broken hearted).
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:13, Reply)

WRONG

Marry Laverne,
Shag Cotton
Kill Willoughby - she is a dick
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:13, Reply)
If you say you wouldn't want to play with her fun-bags then you're a bender.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)

don't make me have the blousie conservation again.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:18, Reply)
I can't remember the Blousie conversation.
But if it is in any way mean to my friend, I'll cut ya.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)

No, of course not, she doesn't believe I prefer a smaller boob. Jeff, I prefer a smaller boob.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)
But Cotton? She has NO TITS.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)

I think she is gorgeous
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
But shouldn't the woman have bigger boobs than you?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)

in an ideal world ;)
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
Me too
Obviously there is something compelling about big'uns, but it is more of a fascination than a desire.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)

When they collapse like a shit souffle it is v disappointing.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
Frankly, I can't understand why so many men *do* like enormous ones.
They're not attractive, they give the owners terrible backache, and it's a two-hand job just to hold one.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:27, Reply)

I like bums the most
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:29, Reply)
Bender

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:29, Reply)

I love a bit of cock me.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:30, Reply)
I haven't got one of those.
I carry all my considerable weight in the front.

I'm like a beetle. "Mama got a little junk in the bonnet"
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:30, Reply)
Darth, give Bobby his log-in back.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:30, Reply)
Hahaha!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:32, Reply)

girl bums
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
I've got no fixed position.
As it were.

But I'm saying that Willoughby is a nicer prospect than Cotton.

Not that I'd kick either out of the sack.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:30, Reply)
In the same way that you can eat so much ice cream it makes you sick.
I like this thing, therefore I must like lots and lots of this thing.
Some people can eat a lot without feeling sick.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:31, Reply)
Someone I once knew
said that any more than a handful was a waste.

Personally, I thought he was a fucking idiot.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:26, Reply)

I AGREE WITH YOUR MATE
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:28, Reply)
You're a fucking idiot.
Nah, skinchies, each to their own innit?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)

Just means if we're ever wingmen we won't be have to worry about picking the same doris.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:37, Reply)
You can only dream of pulling Sweary!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:40, Reply)

Marry: Willoughby
Shag: Laverne
Kill: Cotton

Whoever wants it:

Rihanna
Lady Gaga
Katy Perry
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:14, Reply)
This sounds like a game for the boys

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:17, Reply)
Here you go:
Kiefer Sutherland
Alexander Saarsgard
Justin Bieber
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)
Pretty much in that order
Marry Sutherland (maybe have affair with father)
Shag Skarsgard (repeatedly)
Kill Bieber (slowly and painfully)
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)

One for the girls

Michael Fassbender
Jensen Button
David Beckham
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
You have remarkable taste
..especially when it comes to Donald Sutherland, that man has flicked more charisma from his sweaty brow than most of us would ever exude in a lifetime.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
He was, in his younger days, sex on legs
and quite the way into his older days too. I imagine I still would.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)

Marry Saarsgard (don't know what he looks like so least gay)
Shag Sutherland
Kill Bieber
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:22, Reply)
Nonsense
Join in
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)

Marry Perry
Shag Rihanna
Kill GAGa
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:18, Reply)
Shag GaGA
then marry Gaga
Then kill Gaga
Bingo instant wealth and B-list celebrity status.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
The Light in Gaga
Has a certain ring to it.

Do you know she's a black dude with natty dreads?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
I am totally convinced by your air of sincerity

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:35, Reply)
Don't worry.
I won't mention it next weekend.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:52, Reply)
Tough choices
I don't wish any of them dead; I wouldn't want to marry any of them; my standards are occasionally low enough to possibly shag maybe 1.5 of them.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
Alright chomps?

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
Alright Davvers
If I'm up north, if I have a problem, if no one else can help, and if I can find you....maybe...aw, no forget it, doesn't matter.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
If you're ever up north, I'll buy you a string vest, a poke of chips and a whippet.
Just so you don't feel out of place.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:15, Reply)
Aw man..
I'll feel like a well-fed Rab C Nesbitt/Billy MacKenzie hybrid! Life doesn't get better than that....*sighs*
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
Us northerners are full of hospitality.
And clogged arteries.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:19, Reply)
I noticed I was getting quite drunk
so I have started drinking pints of water. Does this make me sad or old?
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:40, Reply)
Apparently it makes me the last person awake
I win!
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:49, Reply)
WINNER!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 0:52, Reply)
...checks that enough time has passed
WINNER!
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 1:04, Reply)
DOUBLE WIN!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 1:17, Reply)
Beat you all!

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 1:30, Reply)
Get to fook.

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 1:34, Reply)

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