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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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That last thread is getting a bit cluttered.
Have a new one.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:35, Reply)
How exciting!
*despoils*
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:37, Reply)
Chelsea looks to be through.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:39, Reply)
Redknapp looks sick as a dog.
Sour faced old twat.
Ferguson's going to be insufferable though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:41, Reply)
All I care about in City getting enough points to stay up.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:42, Reply)
How many do they need?
And are they likely to do it?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:43, Reply)
I think it'll go to the last game of the season.
There are 3 games less and City are 4 points clear of Coventry.

We've got West Ham at home on Tuesday. I don't see us getting anything from that game.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:46, Reply)
Best of luck
I think we're safe now, not mathematically quite but it would be pretty ludicrous.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:57, Reply)
Evening Jeffster
What should I have for my tea?

Options on the table are:

1) Chilli from the freezer - homemade a few weeks ago
2) Frittata - I've got mushrooms and onion and pepper and various meats I can put in it, fairly tempting but makes a lot of washing up
3) Spicy Sausage Tortelloni and Four Cheese Sauce - I always have a pasta and a sauce in because it only takes 5 minutes and is filling.

What do you reckon?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:44, Reply)
Have the Chilli.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:47, Reply)
Good call
I do need to use up what's in the freezer anyway. That's why I had a Sainsbury's Faux-Magnum this afternoon.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:49, Reply)
What date are you moving?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:50, Reply)
Week of the 23rd
at some point.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:53, Reply)
BORED BORED BORED

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:12, Reply)
Come to the quiz with me.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:13, Reply)
I don't think I'd get there on time
but I could help remotely.

Oh, hang on, I remember I'm not actually helpful at the pub quiz I do go to
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:15, Reply)
There's only two teams here so far.
We stand good chance of coming at least second.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:20, Reply)
Sounds like it's popular

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:21, Reply)
I have this effect...

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:23, Reply)
Are you still taking your dog?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:27, Reply)
Yep. He's say right here.
Unless any burglars are reading this, in which case he's at home on guard.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:29, Reply)
has he scared off all your competition?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:31, Reply)
Gonna get him a packet of crisps this evening?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:31, Reply)
get cheesey moments!
that's what we have at our pub quiz sometimes. The weird thing is that they are made by SMiths, but Smiths Crisps no longer exist. CREEPY, eh?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:33, Reply)
Have you checked the sell-by dates?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:35, Reply)
Don't worry TD
Cavy is in Wales, so they just paint lumps of coal a yellowy-orange and put that in packets.

The locals go mad for it.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:36, Reply)
you get a taste for coal after a while

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:37, Reply)
I don't like coal.
It's the pits.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:37, Reply)
That's a miner setback

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:39, Reply)
this seams to be another pun thread

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:39, Reply)
Maybe we should scuttle it then

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:40, Reply)
I don't want to play.
*Retires to his bunker*
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:41, Reply)
You're just slack

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:41, Reply)
stop slating the poor boy

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:42, Reply)
You two. Stop quarrying.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:42, Reply)
he's picking on me

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:43, Reply)
Me and Jerry Dammers get our solid dairy products from a subterranean facility
Operated by Herr Zoff.

I'm going to the offy now.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:44, Reply)
let's face it

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:41, Reply)
Oooh
You slag (heap).
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:40, Reply)
deliberately not

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:36, Reply)
No. maybe a pepperami though.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:33, Reply)
And the dog?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:34, Reply)
The stepson has just farted on the dog's head.
The dog looks fucking disgusted.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:40, Reply)
Why would he do that

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:41, Reply)
He thinks it's funny.
The dog disagrees.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:44, Reply)
Well, the dog needs to get over himself.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:44, Reply)
He will as soon as he can breathe again.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:47, Reply)
hahaha
What has the stepson eaten?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:48, Reply)
A nest of badgers, by the smell of it...

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:51, Reply)
Ohh, he's badger baiting your dog.
Not wonder he has the hump.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:52, Reply)
Have a wank

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:15, Reply)
you always say that like I haven't already

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:16, Reply)
Have another one

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:16, Reply)
saving it for later
dont' want to rub it away completely
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:21, Reply)
You'll have arms like Popeye

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:22, Reply)
Like Michael Clarke Duncan
only a pale blue-ish white.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:48, Reply)
Usual dilemma - early night or off-license....
It's a tough call tonight....
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:19, Reply)
Co op.
Get the whisky.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:20, Reply)
Don't much care for spirits at home
It'd be wine.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:25, Reply)
Offy.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:21, Reply)
Tomorrow's forecast is the only good day for the week though
And I've no work and fancy a good march with the hounds. Don't want to do that with a hangover.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:23, Reply)
But if you've got no work on....

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:27, Reply)
I like a clear head for a route-march though
Although I suppose I could have a lie in and go in the afternoon. I don't like wasting a good day though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:29, Reply)
Why not get the dogs some beer.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:32, Reply)
One of them likes a drop of Guinness
The other one is stupid enough without beer.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:34, Reply)
They sound like Jedward.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:35, Reply)
Can't be bothered looking for the link
But Jedward have apparently made a formal complaint to Heathrow Airport about the very extensive hossing they get whenever they go through security.

Tee hee.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:37, Reply)
I just had an Auchentoshan and am off to the pub soon.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:20, Reply)
Bless you?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 20:24, Reply)
Where is everyone?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:02, Reply)
I'm here.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:03, Reply)
Entertain me, Jeff.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:04, Reply)
I thought you were at the quiz?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:04, Reply)
Yeah, we are.
But it's only taking about half my brain power.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:05, Reply)
Ask us some questions from the quiz

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:06, Reply)
Question one.
Who is the biggest bender on OT and why.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:12, Reply)
Fair enough.
I've eaten my dinner, but I'm not going to have another Nobbly Bobbly.

There is shite on the telly this evening, I might put a film on.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
i wish i had ice cream right now

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:08, Reply)
What ice cream would you get if you could.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:08, Reply)
um
dunno. Perhaps one of those ones with bits of toffee in it. Or strawberry.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:13, Reply)
Have a Cornetto.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)
oh I could totally go for one of those
but I seem to be eating too much at the moment anyway
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:16, Reply)
I fully expect all of the ladies to be on crash diets prior to JeffSTOCK

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
that is way too much pressure!
How about if I eat more, then that lets the others off the hook as they will look better in comparison?

/scoffs a hundred weight of chocolate
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:19, Reply)
So are you getting yourself a pirate outfit?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:20, Reply)
we've been through this
I don't have to *get* a pirate costume...my tricorn hangs on the back of my lounge door and my pirate jacket is on the coat rack at work
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:22, Reply)
I thought you were joking.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:22, Reply)
ha!
well I won't wear it, don't worry. Although...the tricorn is looking pretty tempting
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:23, Reply)
You could put one of the pigs on your shoulder
As a sort of avante-garde parrot.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:25, Reply)
hahaha
That would be outstanding.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:27, Reply)
Well they're both indigenous to South America
It could be a post-modernist statement.

Are there post-modernist buccanneers?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:29, Reply)
haha

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:28, Reply)
As the very least, you need to get a photo of yourself in such a pose.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:31, Reply)
Just one?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:16, Reply)
Give it to me.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
Can we harmonise?
"Dee-licious Ice creeeeam, From Italeeee".
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:19, Reply)

Dee-licious Ice creeeeam, From Italeeee

You must be joking, they're fifty-pee!
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:20, Reply)
Now advertising car insurance on a small screen near you.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:22, Reply)
Have a wank

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:08, Reply)
I might do some ironing.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:09, Reply)
Living on the edge

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:10, Reply)
It's all about life in the bus lane.
I'm in danger of buying stuff I don't need.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:11, Reply)
Speaking of which/whom
How long before Barry's latest tale of woe?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:12, Reply)
He had plans to take a lady out this evening.
MDMA was mentioned. So I'd imagine about 3am tomorrow morning.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)
He was explaining this on Friday
Good old Barry - I ought to come here more often to keep up.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:15, Reply)
Is saturday night
the Barryoaks omnibus?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:14, Reply)
Normally we get that on a Sunday.
But he is out filming a new episode.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:15, Reply)
He should have timed it so it could be an Easter special

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
He was being blown out over the Easter period.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:19, Reply)
that long has got to hurt your jaw

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:21, Reply)
extreme ironing like those internet dudes used to do in the olden days

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:13, Reply)
I'm half-here
I'm doing several other things too, though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:07, Reply)
Back from the offy

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:09, Reply)
What did you get?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:09, Reply)
Two fine bottles of Pinot Grigiot at half price
And 20 tabs at stupid price.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:11, Reply)
How much are twenty tabs these days?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:11, Reply)
£6 fucking 50 fucking 3
Time to give up. Mind you I said that when they hit 5.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:13, Reply)
Ouch.
I'm pleased I'm on the Cutters.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:16, Reply)
I don't even smoke a good brand any more
Haven't a clue how much Rothmans would be now.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:17, Reply)
Probably seven quid or more I'd imagine.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:18, Reply)
Never got the hang of rollies
I could buy a roller I suppose.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:21, Reply)
If you buy 'baccy, skins and filters and nothing else.
You'll soon find a way to make them, assuming you really want a smoke.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:23, Reply)
Smoking's for muppets, like.
Just saying.
How's things round these parts these days?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:25, Reply)
And waltzing's for dreamers and losers in love
Y'reet, marra?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:27, Reply)
As bonny as a bonny thing ;)
Garden is coming up nicely, did some nice masonry yesterday, family all well (apart from the 'rents obviously) and I'm hardly drinking at all these days. Smug as fuck, thanks ;)
Yee?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:31, Reply)
On the whole fairly smart
Getting over the early-days self employment jitters now and making a living out of it.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:34, Reply)
Good effort, bonny lad.
It's a solitary furrow to plough.
Happy for you that it's finally paying off.
I was listening to The New Fads last album "Love it all" earlier today and thought of you. How beautifully gay is that? Do you know it? A marvellous piece of vinyl.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:44, Reply)
I am utterly ignorant of The New Fads I'm afraid.
I did a sort of psychological self-diagnosis before going out on my own.

I've got the rental income which more or less covers day-to-day expenses but should be my retirement fund, but I didn't realise just how scary it would be at first.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)
They are really popular at the moment.
But they won't last....
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)
Lol good one ;)
I don't think they've released anything since about 1995 ;)
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
Things be fine.
Not a lot going on round here.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:28, Reply)
Considering that the pension money ran out twenty years ago and we are plummeting towards peak oil
the jokes on every one else
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:28, Reply)
Are you channelling Woodside tonight?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:30, Reply)
No. But I am capable of being verry cynical
this is a useful skill as it is the next best thing to years of actual experience.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:34, Reply)
I have years of actual experience
I don't tend towards the apocalyptic, although I do despair a little at times.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:36, Reply)
And you can spell.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:45, Reply)
Willenium can usually spell too.
If theirs' onbe thing i hate....
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:55, Reply)
Sorry guys,
Forgot the proof-reading step.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:57, Reply)
£7.15 form my tobbaconist

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:24, Reply)
Double-you tea eff?
Thanking fuck I canned the cane 6 years ago.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:28, Reply)
I suspect this would be right up Baz's alley
www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=gfFzCDIQ_a8

Watch to the very end, though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:49, Reply)
This is good enough for /links

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:54, Reply)
And who am I to argue?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:58, Reply)
That's the sort of thing you'd expect to see on 'Tarrant on TV'
Which should be starting now, just after Londons' Burning.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 21:57, Reply)
I thought Clive James would be coming on
With clips from "Endurance."
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:03, Reply)
Don't worry
I'm here now.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:01, Reply)
Thank god for that.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:02, Reply)
I know
I can see I was missed.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:03, Reply)
What have you done this evening?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:08, Reply)
Ooh all exciting stuff, Jeff
Since we last spoke I have had dinner, bathed my son and put him to bed, carried my sleeping daughter to bed, washed up and made my lunch for tomorrow. I have earned this beer.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
That's pretty rock and roll there mate.
Have you forced your kids to be veggie, just like you?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:15, Reply)
I most certainly have
Well, my daughter has only ever consumed milk, but my son is thriving on a vegetarian diet.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
I hope you choose their religion and tell them that people who look a bit different are criminals too!
:-)
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)
I have chosen atheism for them
It seems easier to believe.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
You've given them a belief that allows them to eat bacon
But you don't let them. What sort of monster are you?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
Finally!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:03, Reply)
Sorry
Been busy evening. I'm here now though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:06, Reply)
I'm here too.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:04, Reply)
That is handy
Could use a trusty sidekick.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:05, Reply)
Just like The Adam!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:07, Reply)
Are you going for some sort of record number of user-names?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:06, Reply)
Just out of curiosity how many user-names have you gotten through?
I'm on my third
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:10, Reply)
For 7 years, 5 months and 20 days I've been The Disappointed - never changed it.
Bobby changes his name every couple of days.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:13, Reply)
I changed to willenium after about two months
stayed the same ever since
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
In the very very early days I had another name
But I can't remember what it was.

This account has always been TD. Don't think I've even changed it for seasons.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
I still have the same marquee text from 2004

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:18, Reply)
Shit yes, you're a lower number than me.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:19, Reply)
youngsters

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:21, Reply)
This was all fields etc..

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)
I remember the first QOTW
it was a thread on /board
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Wasn't it something similar to housemates from hell?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
possibly
I remember answering, but not what it was
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
I lol'd at nearly every answer

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
and the days when the compo wasn't voted on
but had someone pick the winners each time. I came second twice (possibly 3 times, don't remember)
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:26, Reply)
So how did you get on here?
First time - the one I can't remember - a mate sent me a link.

Second time - this account - I was working nights and bored shitless and remembered the link.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:29, Reply)
I friend sent me a link to 'Tales of the Blode' and I followed the links from rathergood.com

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
for some reason I found something on underpants toast
It's possible I had an idea and just searched it online. I think it was between that and Hatt Baby and the singing kittens. Was getting bored of the NTK (Need To Know) newsletter and changed to B3ta. Was on /board for a few years, then 4rthur, then there was a break (with a little lurking on /board) and then here when I started living on my own and being all shutin
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
I'm trying to remember my mate's user name
But he put a lot of Kitty No-Hands stuff on.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
And OT was years off

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
That's some low user number you got there

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:23, Reply)
Back then this was all fields
And everyone seemed to work in IT. I lurked for about a year before I joined.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)
Hes been two different people today.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:14, Reply)
Is that a personal best?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
No idea.
The natural reaction is to ignore.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:22, Reply)
I have never ignored anyone

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:24, Reply)
I don't mean 'put on ignore' just
'Hmm, is that Bob or not?'
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
Optimus prime is the key

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)
I'm by no means welded to b3ta
But regardless of his nom de jour I always know it's Bobby.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:25, Reply)
I go through phases,
I spent most of 2006 on b3ta, and was sad enough to be here on new years 2008
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
Think I did one New Year.
These aren't good memories...
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:31, Reply)
My first response to being shaken out of bed by the earthquake in the same year
was to discuss this matter on /talk
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
I have posted precisely once on /talk
It moves too fast for me. At least, it did.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)
The gay shift is noted for its huge level of thread rushing
but yes, it is too fast. Hence the need for OT.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
I thought O/T arose from sub-answers to QOTW

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:48, Reply)
That too

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:52, Reply)
Three actually!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:28, Reply)
It's fun to change it. Plus I don't care if anyone steals em

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:27, Reply)
I would like mod powers just to satisfy my curiosity
such as who is name squatting, and who is the most ignored b3tan
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:29, Reply)
I'm considering ignoring al. I reckon I change my name(s) the most.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:32, Reply)
I don't see the point

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)

In what?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)
Ignore.
Surely it's easier to post pictures of that Welsh Lad who ended up doing time for trolling and telling them it's all going in 'the file'.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:36, Reply)
I assume it is for people who aren't capable of just ignoring what someone says.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
(I'd reply to ^ but I think it'll be more amusing to ignore it)

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
THAT'S IT IM PUTTING YOU ON IGNORE!!!!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)
(who said that?)

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:47, Reply)
Just tired of it all really and can't be fucked to even acknowledge it anymore.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
Well, fair enough, it's just that if there is a thread started by someone you've got on ignore
You won't see it.

But considering the quality of OT these days, that's no bad thing.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
Exactly, night shift is my scene anyway

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)
Why do we have to have you?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)
He'll change his tune after the weekend.
When he realises we're all dead strange.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:44, Reply)
Cow

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:50, Reply)
Cr3 refused to answer the ignore one
on the grounds of the eleventh commandment : Thou shalt not give trolls a score.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:33, Reply)
Is that a mod? I don't know who any are?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:35, Reply)
Cr3 is indeed a mod
So is god. He nawty stepped me once.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:37, Reply)
What was your crime?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
What did you do?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
Posted a link to eFuckt.com
It was a naked black midget starting a fight in a pr0n studio
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
Sweet

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
here you go.
www.b3ta.com/links/235413
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)

Git
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:49, Reply)
I also did this to say sorry
www.b3ta.com/links/235422
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:50, Reply)
I'm assuming you fell foul of /links' favourite trick there?
I didn't click just in case. Despite being massively into midget porn or whatever it was supposed to be...

Edit: or apparently not?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:52, Reply)
Its now kittenwar

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:54, Reply)
Yeah, I thought it was going to be I Love Horses

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:57, Reply)
It's OK, you're not at work now (I presume)
It's...it's...KITTIES!
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:54, Reply)
Good to see J*hled trotting out his usual gimmick of calling people teenagers.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:50, Reply)
You're a sort of /Talk/OT/QOTW crossover Woodside.
A man of many talents, if you will.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:59, Reply)
Woodside is one of the few B3tans I have met IRL

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:01, Reply)
And me.
A very sound man indeed.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:02, Reply)
It was at the pontefract bash

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:04, Reply)
For the good of humanity I'd rather not talk about the day I met Woodside.
I also met AA. And Bella...
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
I'll be at the Leeds bash

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:07, Reply)
Depends on work.
Saturdays and Sundays are my busiest days of the week.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:09, Reply)
Well, we won the quiz.
It's official. I rock.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:38, Reply)
+ And there was only one team!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:39, Reply)
Nah, there were four teams in the end.
The table round was pictures of famous doctors, both fictitious and non. We got them all except that german autopsy guy. I even got dr nick riviera, for which I was terribly smug.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)
Hi everybody!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)
hi, dr nick!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:54, Reply)
You need a new challenge
This quiz is too easy.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:40, Reply)
Oooh.
He's calling you think b3th.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:41, Reply)
Haha. You suck.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:42, Reply)
No. YOU suck.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:43, Reply)
you wish

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:53, Reply)
Wishing on a staaaar.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:55, Reply)
Give us a few questions then

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:46, Reply)
yeah go on then
I have my quizzle stick at the ready
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:05, Reply)
Oh christ, I can't remember any questions now

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:06, Reply)
WE NEED QUESTIONS.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:08, Reply)
YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE QESTIONS!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
Or the spelling, apparently.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:10, Reply)
That's Numberwang!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:12, Reply)
hahahaha
Is Nick Griffin still in your flat?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Yeah
less grouchy now though. I fed him custard tart and he cheered up a bit.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
custard tart....
I've never heard it called that before.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
Tsk
It was from M&S, actually.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:23, Reply)
Why not tell TB that M&S use people of colour to make their custard tarts.
See how he feels about it then.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:25, Reply)
I don't care to make him grumpy again
because then *I* will be grumpy again.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:31, Reply)
It's all about the grump with you today.
You need to start looking forward to the weekend, not worry about your special little tarty custard cannon.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:32, Reply)
I am looking forward to the weekend
I've got a pretty dress to wear and bought me train tickets and stuff.

EDIT - although the weather forecast is making me do a sadface.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:37, Reply)
Ssssh.
If we don't talk about the rain, maybe it will go away.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:41, Reply)
Qestions I'm fine with
Questions are tough.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:12, Reply)
what actor had a 1990 hit with the song 'mona'?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:15, Reply)
Craig McGoulhlin
Or similar spelling - bloke off Neighbours.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:16, Reply)
yep.
i was the only one who got that one.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:18, Reply)
I got it as well
But I'm 200 miles North.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
I'd have answered, 'Henry from Neighbours'

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:19, Reply)
you would technically have been right
but she wouldn't have given you the point. if it's not what's on the card, she's very strict like that.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:22, Reply)
Tough but fair

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:24, Reply)
He ended up with the dead tidy one on the show, if memory serves.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:26, Reply)
Plain Jane Superbrain?
She was fit.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:27, Reply)
Nah, that was Mike.
Hang on. I'll try and Google her name, see if I can find a picture.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:28, Reply)
Not Bouncer.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:29, Reply)
Certainly not!

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:30, Reply)
The one I'm thinking of played Bronwyn.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:31, Reply)
I can't remember Bronwyn
This is getting out of lectures at Leeds Uni days for me, probably kicking Lighty out of the way because he was there at the same time.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:34, Reply)
Your tastes might run to such a lovely golden retriever though
OH NO - WHAT AM I SAYING!

(That's another show)
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:32, Reply)
rachel friend
they were together in real life too
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:31, Reply)
He was punching above his weight then.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:33, Reply)
a lot of men do

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:33, Reply)
Proof there that women should diet.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:35, Reply)
what?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:36, Reply)
Henry wasn't a 'small' person
So if 'Friend' weighed more than him....
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:36, Reply)
oh.
aha ha ha ha ha.

hilarious.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:38, Reply)
Are you frantically backpedalling there?

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:38, Reply)
It's alright.
I know he despises me.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:42, Reply)
I've not idea why you think this.
I'd wager I'll be falling over myself to buy you a drink this weekend.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:43, Reply)
I'm sure I owe you a couple first x

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:46, Reply)
I'll have two from the top.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:51, Reply)
I can't imagine Dogfucker despising anyone.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:43, Reply)
^ This.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:44, Reply)
Don't let me commend you - Buffoon.
Commend yourself.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:46, Reply)
UK billboard chart I assume?
...I have no idea
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:17, Reply)
We could step over here
But it may be a waste as I'm off to bed soon.

Dogs and moorland tomorrow!
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:48, Reply)
ah, that's better.
It's nice over here.

Try not to unearth any dead bodies while you're out walking.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:49, Reply)
Closer to home than you might think
Because I often go onto Saddleworth.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:50, Reply)
Oooh.
Is there a prize if you find the last piece?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:52, Reply)
I hope so
It might be too late to train the boys to find rotten corpses though.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:54, Reply)
The only way to get them in the mood is to start slaying folk.
Give it a go. What's the worse than can happen?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)
I think mass murder is one of those things you feel a vocation for
I'm a bit too old to change paths now.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:58, Reply)
Maybe.
But you've only been self employed for a bit, and whilst that didn't start as well as you hoped, things have picked up.

Maybe genocide is your true calling.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:59, Reply)
Pol Pot didn't embark on Genocide until later life.
You could be right.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
Well, but it on your kitchen calendar for September.
It might still be dry.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)
Eh?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
Ah.
So you go out there to *bury* the bodies?
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:53, Reply)
I know a better place
Dozer's garden.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:55, Reply)
+ lady

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 23:56, Reply)
On second thoughts
It's 30 miles from my house to Dozer's and the rotting corpse smell would linger in the car.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
I've heard he's very handsome.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:01, Reply)
He could stare at your tits and it would be a compliment.
Assuming stories of his height are true.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
I'm used to people staring at my tits.
They have their own postcode.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
Your tits have their own postcode?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:05, Reply)
They're rather large.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:06, Reply)
Not for me then
I prefer the smaller breasted lady.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Damn.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
Don't worry
I'm emphatically not a prime specimin of homo sapiens.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:18, Reply)
Well
Not sapiens, anyway.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:19, Reply)
You calling me a puff?
I might as well be - I'm heading for Cavy style desperation.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)
Ooh err missus.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
Like the man out of Maroon 5

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:03, Reply)
Hello all!
It's not been a bad weekend, much booze, we won at football, and I've spent half the day on one of my favourite games!

How are we all?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:04, Reply)
Don't do such a thing.
I want to go to bed and have a hearty walk tomorrow and I feel compelled to stay awake now.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:07, Reply)
I'm spoiling for a fight with someone about Suarez being a dirty cunt.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:08, Reply)
Oooh. I'll have a fight with you.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Excellent.
Do I have to provide the jelly?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:11, Reply)
Please.
I'll bring the paddling pool.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
Gotcha.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:17, Reply)
And if I can forget to bring your bikini top....

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)
Why do you have my bikini top?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)
In my garden.
I've got it tied between two trees. It's a double hammock.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
Oh no you didn't!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
*lounges*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:27, Reply)
You'll get yours, mate

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:28, Reply)
Can't. Wait.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:29, Reply)
*plots*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:34, Reply)
*nurses semi*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:34, Reply)
:-p

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:37, Reply)
Don't tell Gonz.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
It'll be our little secret.
Okay, uncle jeff?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:41, Reply)
That just sounds wrong.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:44, Reply)
You started it!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:45, Reply)
No. You did.
You invaded Poland.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:48, Reply)
For the rugby tackle?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Among other things.
How the hell was he awarded man of the match?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
Was the best player on the pitch, scored one
Was responsible for several other chances
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:12, Reply)
Behaved in a very unsportsmanlike manner to members of the other team.
I remember when man of the match was the player you could hold up as an example to others.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
Fair enough
Football isn't a game with values anymore, look at the number of players who clearly are scum. Ballotelli, Suarez, Young, most teams have at least one player many of the fans are ashamed of when they dive, foul or make the most of every contact.

However, we prefer to love them for the good that they do, compared to the bad.

Then again, did you see Young's dive today? Exceptional.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:21, Reply)
I gave it a 6.0

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:22, Reply)
I didn't see it when it happened
I saw a wonderful gif of it afterwards though, showing that the only contact was when Young stepped on the other guys foot.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
It was fantastic. Blatant penalty attempt.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:26, Reply)
Second in two games, absolutely ridiculous
At least the guy didn't get red carded this time.

Chelsea were very lucky not to have Cech red carded
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:28, Reply)
Not that it made any difference, but I'd like to see the ref reprimanded for that chelsea goal

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:30, Reply)
Me too, definitely

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:31, Reply)
If he pulled something like that at an international, we'd never hear the end of it.
There's no excuse for it thesedays. 66 is long gone.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
Aye, they've got to bring in goal line technology, there has been far too many bad calls on it

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
Trouble is,
It works in rugby because it's a game with a lot of stopping and starting anyway. That sort of thing would disrupt the flow of a decent game of football.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:36, Reply)
I can't imagine it taking more than about 30 seconds, surely?
That's only as long as the celebrations usually go on?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:41, Reply)
Maybe there should be a fifth official, at the other end of a camera feed

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:42, Reply)
Makes sense

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:43, Reply)
Evening AA

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:09, Reply)
Evening Jeff

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:10, Reply)
So are you off to the cup final?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:16, Reply)
Hoping to watch it in Liverpool
But as all of my money is going the week before, I won't be able to head to London
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:19, Reply)
That's a shame.
Still, the chance of two cup in a year much make it a good season?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:20, Reply)
Are you drunk?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
I wouldn't call it a 'good' season
As we should have been higher in the league too. Sadly, we've had a lot of bad luck, Lucas' injury being arguably the pivotal moment of our season. Fact is though, several players simply aren't playing well enough, and it's time for them to either buck their ideas up, or be shown the door.

Downing had a rather good game yesterday, but sadly it might be too little, too late for him. That said, I'd rather have Rodriguez in the team than either Downing or Henderson.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
If we must stay up can we not talk about vegball?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:23, Reply)
Poof

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:24, Reply)
I was force-fed football as a kid
I hate it.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:25, Reply)
Vegballvegballvegballvegball
Edit - look at me I'm ace.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:33, Reply)
Sorry.
What would you like to talk about?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:38, Reply)
Not fucking football.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:39, Reply)
Men's bottoms?
Flower arranging?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:40, Reply)
It is possible to despise football and be straight.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:43, Reply)
I keep losing track - are you coming next weekend?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:44, Reply)
I told Jeff that I would if I could
But it's probably no. Most of my work is weekends and I've got to keep my satisfied customers even more satisfied.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:48, Reply)
*tears*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:49, Reply)
You'd not be sobbing if you met me
I am a fat moribund man.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:51, Reply)
Well it would make me feel better about myself.
b3th calls me 'mong-band'
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:51, Reply)
How very dare you!
I call you boy band, on account of your youthful looks. It's just coincidence that you're a mong.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:53, Reply)
I'll run you over in my wheelchair if you don't watch your mouth.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:54, Reply)
You might need a run up. I'm a pretty hefty target.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:56, Reply)
This is a bit Dozer
But if you want to know what you're missing I look scarily like the drummer.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=sJAOG75HM6Y
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 0:58, Reply)
I'm so sorry.
I saw the artist and closed the tab.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 1:00, Reply)
A fading voice
Don't dismiss Bruce..

Bedtime
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 1:03, Reply)
Bedtime indeed.
I'll see you quenders tomorrow.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 1:04, Reply)
If it's bowling for soup, you probably mean the bassist.
Sorry,i can't see links on my phone.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 1:00, Reply)

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