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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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When people smoke outside the back door of my office
the smell comes in through the vent pipe of the air con unit next to my desk.

Since I'm obviously not going to do the mature thing of waiting until someone is smoking, opening my window, politely explaining the situation and asking if they would mind standing further away from the door when smoking, how should I vent my impotent rage at them?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:37, Reply)
I can't remember where I worked, or even if it really happened and I'm not making it up...
... but someone used to smoke weed right next to an air vent for years.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:39, Reply)
Anonymous notes in capitals with red ink work best man

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:41, Reply)
I like this.
Should I make the notes out of letter cut from magazines?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:42, Reply)
Hello and OK does not a threatening letter make

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:43, Reply)
Only when you start adding different persona's who are also upset at the mindless anti social activity
you don't want to come across as a lone whinger
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:45, Reply)
Start a thread on here about it

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:42, Reply)
I'd post onto an internet site they have no chance of finding, personally
Or light and flick matches out the window
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:43, Reply)
press your puckered hairy barking spider up against the vent
and let rip. you should finish off about 3 at a time, probably more after meat with monty.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:46, Reply)
Piss down the vent

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:47, Reply)
Start smoking, like a winner.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:49, Reply)
I heard that you get a natty red cravat and whispy moustach if you smoke long enough

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:04, Reply)
Wait until they start smoking, run out with a club
Twat them around the head until the skull caves in, then fuck the hole.

That'll teach them.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:53, Reply)
The no smoking anywhere, anytime bollocks annoys me.
I don't smoke cigs, I just class it as an act of health Naziism. Especially in pubs and clubs ffs.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 13:59, Reply)
i have a problem with a neighbour of mine who is extremely poor at parking
she usually parks diagonally across two spaces, making it difficult to squeeze in next to her and still get out of the car without catching the door

i've taken to subtly leaving the card of a driving instructor i know on her windscreen, i hope she gets the message
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:00, Reply)
oh and in response to your problem lets go away and set up our own business
i hear there's a lot of money to be made in waste reclamation. It was rude of me not to post this reply first, apologiers superfly
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:01, Reply)
While they are away from their desks, take a dump in their top draw

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:01, Reply)
i accidentally clicked i like this on your post
soz everyone
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:02, Reply)
I accidentally posted pictures of your mum's cum filled gaping axe wound onto the interent
soz
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:04, Reply)
i just looked back at phillie joe's replies to me in monty's thread
and i have decided that i am now in love with him, do you know any fancy dress shops that do an oven glove costume?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:05, Reply)
You'll probably have to make your own

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:08, Reply)
tips?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:10, Reply)
get two duvets, cut out an oven glove shape, stitch together
create opening for "Philly love"
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:12, Reply)
:O
this is actually a well thought out post
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:14, Reply)
Too well thought out...

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
Fuck sake, that'll only encourage him.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:05, Reply)
I am encouragable

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:05, Reply)
i didn't mean to
the screen was refreshing and i tried to click somewhere but the page jumped and ruined it all
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:06, Reply)
my mate kept getting woken up in the early hours by a twat slamming his car door really hard
He tried leaving notes but to no avail. In the end he got an idea from brainiacs and made that exploding paste which is safe whilst moist but explodes when dry. He went out and smeared it in the gaps around the door frame. Its a lot more powerful than he thought. Glass exploded and door wouldn't close properly. For weeks he was worried the bomb squad were going to come knocking. He didn't even wear gloves.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:09, Reply)
you were still wrong in taht other thread you know

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:10, Reply)
/QOTW is that way >>>

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:10, Reply)
Someone I know, someone poured petrol all over their truck* and set fire to it, but the boot was filled with filled up diving bottles. It took the dive centre it was parked in.
* because someone died in mysterious circamstances on their boat. They nearly died themselves. Basiclly, he went for a dive, and when he went to come up, the boat was gone. He swam 3 miles to shore, and got a friend to go searching for the boat. They found it with the dog going balistic but his friend wasn't there. They think he fell overboard and couldn't get back in 'cus of the dog (it was a huge rocky).
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:15, Reply)
Was the dog called Sylvester?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:16, Reply)
Gonz, I can't make sense of this.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
I like how the explanation makes even less sense than the original point.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
Well at least you know his drugs have kicked in and he's not in pain anymore
4 EVA in R Hartz
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:26, Reply)
G owned a dive centre,
G went on a boat with M (and the dog, D). When G surficed, the boat was gone, so he swam back to shore, about 3 miles he guessed. First thing G did was get a friendly fisherman's boat to find his own boat. when they eventually found it, M wasn't there, and D was going balistic. I *think* but can't remember that M washed up on shore a few days later, but can't remember that.

M's family thought G murdered M, there were a few altercations, like G got stabbed in a bar by M's mates. One of the things that happened was, they set fire to G's truck, which was filled with gas bottles in the back.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:39, Reply)
The bad film thread was earlier Gonz

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:56, Reply)

film
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Put a laminated notice up outside.
Don't forget to laminate it.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:10, Reply)
Comic Sans is a nice friendly font to use.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:11, Reply)
Quite informal font, that.
No capitals as shouty notice will only encourage them to smoke more.

Don't skimp when laminating.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:12, Reply)
dude not everybody is like you...
.... laminating is not as important for the rest of us.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:14, Reply)
I am going to laminate this reply.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:17, Reply)
I am going to laminate your mum.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:19, Reply)
That might lessen the stench.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:20, Reply)
Yo mamma so flat...

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
fundamental Christians thought she was the world

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
Oh, again, textbook.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)
maybe use IMPACT for the heading
and some clip art of people smoking
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:12, Reply)
Like it!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:14, Reply)
Lamination.
Ooh ooh, lamination. That's what you need. If you want to be the best, if you wanna beat the rest, ooh ooh ooh laminations what you need.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:12, Reply)

ti n

They'll tell the smokers to fuck off for you! Either that or nonce them up, win-win really.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:13, Reply)
Grass them up to security and call the police.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:15, Reply)
Keep a shit in a tupperware box
when you smell smoke, fling it out of the window.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:13, Reply)
Would you be able to smell the smoke over the shit?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:19, Reply)
Tupperware thilly

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:21, Reply)
he'll have kroney round there before he can say
anything
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:20, Reply)
CAPtain JAMES t KRONEY
to the rescue
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
i have tried and tried
but those caps are just random, right? no hidden message??
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
it's supposed to be Shatner-esque emphasis

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)
oh, sorry
if i were the kind of social retard who liked stuff about space and thought that computer games were really cool, i might have got that, i guess...
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:28, Reply)
*I* got it.
I am not a social retard, I am very* popular.

*reasonably
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:30, Reply)
there's an exception to every rule, krones

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:33, Reply)
+disease
Leave Gonz alone!
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:35, Reply)
yOuR CApSl0ck i5 fUck3D

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
always with the tupperware.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:23, Reply)
On an unrelated topic, I am amused to see that Anders Breivik is pleading not guilty.
"I totally didn't do it, y'honour. Self defence, innit."

Genius.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:22, Reply)
Didn't he say he admitted doing it
but that he was pleading not guilty becuase he didn't recognise the authority of the court to try him? Some shit like that.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:24, Reply)
he admits the killings but not responsibility

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:25, Reply)
did a bigger boy make him do it?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:25, Reply)
The Muzzas made him do it
what with their muslamic-ray-guns and funny butchery practices
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:27, Reply)
fucking muslamic ray guns.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:31, Reply)
Hey
They put the FUN into fundamental
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:32, Reply)
He said he was doing it in self defence as a honkey.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:25, Reply)
Racist

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:27, Reply)
They have about 30 witnesses!
The interesting thing will be the decision on his sanity.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:27, Reply)
he's already been declared sane
that's why the trial is going ahead in it's current form
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:28, Reply)
Insane, then a sane opinion.
According to that documentary last night.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:30, Reply)
He's confessed to the killings.
So the trial is only really a forum for his twisted hate. But, since he pleaded not guilty, there has to be a trial.

with the court thing - turns out he said "I do not recognise the Norwegian courts. You have received your mandate from political parties which support multiculturalism"

So, no worries there then. That'll definitely stand up.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:30, Reply)
He's only looking at 21 years if he's convicted, and found not mad.
So he sounds reasonably sane to me.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:27, Reply)
77 people dead, 21 years in jail...if he survives
Seems slightly lenient
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:28, Reply)
There's indefinate detention if he is still considered a risk to himself or others
but 21 years is the maximum you can get in Norway.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:30, Reply)
he won't only serve 21 years
they have the mandate to never release him. 21 years is merely the maximum standard murder sentence in Norway.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:31, Reply)
A little over three months for each life and
he will still only be 54 when he gets out.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:29, Reply)
small price to pay in the war on brown people

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:30, Reply)
He should be released at weekends.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:32, Reply)
this is what i love about the internet
somebody says something stupid and ill informed, and more stupid people believe them
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
*agrees with Quinten*
oh wait.....
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
You are so much better than everybody

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
this is the most correct thing posted by anyone today

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:35, Reply)

this is what i love about the internet
somebody says something stupid and ill informed, and more stupid people believe them
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:37, Reply)
textbook

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:37, Reply)
your copy/paste skills are as poor as your legal knowledge
you didn't even get the first line in the header :(
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:38, Reply)
i LOL'd
although i also hate myself for saying it: quentin has actually gotten better recently. hmmmmm.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:42, Reply)
What happened to you Swipe.
You used to hate all the good posters, now look at you, you're praising Quniten and we had a pleasant conversation just the other day.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:44, Reply)
hey hey hey, don't let's go sucking anyone off just yet
i said he had got "better". that doesn't mean he shouldn't still die in a fire. and i had my fingers crossed when i was typing to you, so ner.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:45, Reply)
its really haerd to trype [peroperl;y we3ith ypu fingwers cr4psswed,

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:48, Reply)
weird, i just made this exact joke to the ex
who is waiting for test results (no, not AIDZ before you say it).

great minds think alike
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:50, Reply)
Is it cancer?
I hope it's cancer, it's cancer!
I hope it's cancer, it's cancer!
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:51, Reply)
it could be cancer of the cock?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:00, Reply)
Has he got a lump on his cock?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:01, Reply)
Not any more!
badumtish
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:03, Reply)
no, it's nowhere near his cock
it's a collarbone thing. but that's not as good a story.

cancer of the cock it is.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:03, Reply)
cancer of the collarbone?
nasty.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:06, Reply)
He has a cock on his collarbone
and it's got cancer.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:06, Reply)
bollocks

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:07, Reply)
that would be handy
you'd never need to buy a lollipop ever again.

reminds me of an old favourite: "he's as useful as a cock-flavoured lollipop".
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:08, Reply)
I've never understood why it is that when they use strap ons in lesbian porn flicks
they insist on fellating them.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:09, Reply)
i presume it's because they think the men watching like to see that
i don't know if this is an accurate or a fair assumption.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:11, Reply)
To satisfy straight blokes,
who are jacking off over their screens. I of course, have never watched porn online.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Wait... hang on...
You can get porn online now?
Why did nobody tell me?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:16, Reply)
Certainly none with anyone who wasn't white and british.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:17, Reply)
I, for one, am against the Islamification of pornography.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:18, Reply)
*Shudders*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:22, Reply)
THIS HAS ALREADY HAPPENED IN THE MANCHESTER AREA

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:26, Reply)
that's basically how humans work, though.
the fuckwits.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
then you and i are clearly some new master race
are there any scandinavian islands you fancy visiting with me?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:36, Reply)
the problem is they're all prepared now.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:42, Reply)
I reckon you could take Thanet unawares

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:59, Reply)
FUCKING THANET I FUCKING HATE THANET
FUCK OFF THANET

CUNTS
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:11, Reply)
The only place I can recall visiting in Kent is Sheppey.
What a toilet.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:15, Reply)
all of kent needs burning to the ground and starting again

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:19, Reply)
It's France in all but name.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
even france has more class than that shithole

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:22, Reply)
Sheppey is actually a very picturesque spot to visit.
it's just the inhabitants. Most resemble the bald ones from Eastenders.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:26, Reply)
That happens alot.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:35, Reply)
"I ACCIDENTALLY set off a bomb in the high street and opened fire on
a youth group with several automatic and semi-automatic weapons by ACCIDENT. Y'honour. I'm also totally mad. Baaa. See?"
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:29, Reply)
do that in uxbridge
and they'll give you a medal
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:32, Reply)
They'd call you a crime prevention officer.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:33, Reply)
uxbridge really is a case for mandatory vasectomies at birth

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:44, Reply)
If you go "baaaaaa (I'm a sheep)" in uxbridge.
They put your hind legs in the wellies and walk you to the edge of a cliff.

Ok, maybe not uxbridge, but I'm some parts of the country.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)
nah, he wants to be declared sane.
insanity invalidates his mandate rather.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:34, Reply)
Yes, shooting up an island of teenagers
is certainly the action of a sane man. He'll have no trouble convincing the jury of that one!
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:45, Reply)
I don't think the trial or the jury decides that though, does it?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Whoever, whatever
not really important.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:50, Reply)
A fair and true justice system isn't important you are correct

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:53, Reply)
I should be in charge of justice.
I'd be awesome at it. Screw trial by your peers. TRIAL BY COMBAT.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:57, Reply)
The accused would have to wear a lizard suit
and fight me in a quarry whilst I throw polystyrene rocks at them.

All with that der der der der deerrrrr derder music being piped in.

HAMMERPUNCH
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:58, Reply)
Being declared insane also means he'll be stuck away for life
instead of the maximum 21 years if he's tried and found guilty.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:53, Reply)
*sigh*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:54, Reply)
possibly, but like we said up there
the max 21 years doesn't really apply, he can be imprisoned for "life" if he's considered a danger. It's only the same as the way sentencing works here really.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 14:55, Reply)
If he spends the whole 21 years going "I can't wait to kill more children" they don't go, "dammit, we've just got to let him out"

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:05, Reply)
sounds like maybe they should, before Breivik I'd never even heard of Norway

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:13, Reply)
What I didn't quite get was the dozen or so people who not only shook his hand but bowed their heads at him.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
It's weird.
I smoke but the smell of other people smoking makes me feel ill. Really ill.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:04, Reply)
You're some sort of health nazi.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:06, Reply)
sorry i went away for a minute, who's being wrong on the internet now?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Me

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:13, Reply)
STOP BEING WRONG TANGLEUPINBLUE

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:13, Reply)
Ok
Soz.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:15, Reply)
This is my last day off and there are two geordies on a crane outside invading my privacy.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:12, Reply)
Someone in Newcastle is going to very happy with their twins.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:14, Reply)
Hahah

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:14, Reply)
is it ant and dec?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:15, Reply)
Nah I think it's Rodney Bewes and James Bolam

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:16, Reply)
Are you sure it's not Jimmy Nail and Alan Shearer?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:16, Reply)
She's lying.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:17, Reply)
*walks away in crocodile shoes*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:19, Reply)
It might be Kevin Whately and Marcus Bentley

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:19, Reply)
LAST DAAAAY OFF FOR ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOTAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH
AND TWO BLERKS ARE TRYING TO LOOK AT HER TITS THOOO THA WINDA
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
I don't mind the lookin' man
It's the beepin of the fookin crane a canny stand man
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
I dated Kevin Whatelys daughter in year 5.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
He's lying

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
JIMMY
(Nail, not Hill.)
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
TOTALLY DIDN'T
he lived up the posh road while he was working in Oxford filming Morse, she was in my class in lower school. She's like an opera singer now or something. I haven't spoken to her for years.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:23, Reply)
you should have waited til she was older you pervert!
hahahahahaahahetc
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
I should she's actually very hot now.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)
I thought you lived north of the border now?
Not that you ever told me you were leaving.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:16, Reply)
I can't be bothered to read through all the messages on here to find out if you have been an inconsiderate arsehole,
so I will assume you have.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:17, Reply)
A newbie posted a passive agressive comment on QOTW about me.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE DON'T LIKE ME ON THE INTERNET!?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:18, Reply)
I know! You're so much nicer on here than IRL.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Exactly Clendrix. You've hit the nail right on the head.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:22, Reply)
I did tell you!
And everyone in Edinburgh is too posh to paint windows so they pay people from Tyneside to do it.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:17, Reply)
Your "fiancee" never did.
Did have a fun minutes silence yesterday?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:18, Reply)
I didn't watch that match.
I did my silence before the Wembley derby, where we got beat.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
God was really rubbing it in eh?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
But yesterday was the anniversary wasn't it?
That's why the grief monkeys refused to let Chelsea have an extra day before their champions league match?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Al I'm not the person to try and get a rise out of over this one.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:23, Reply)
Because you don't care if scousers die or not?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:24, Reply)
I had a relative who died there, but I'm still not as obsessed with it as you.
Bore off.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:25, Reply)
Go on Roota, delete him off facebook
It's the only language he understands.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)
That is a language he most definitely doesn't understand.
He sends messages asking why you've deleted him, then he messages your friends asking why you've deleted him.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)
Only when it's a pikey who I thought had stolen my driveway when she deleted me.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:29, Reply)
You cannae cover it up man, you were heartbroken

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
Did he cry when DJ left facebook?
I know I did.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
Does he still lurk on here and curse to himself everytime you post
You've ruined the internet for your poor brother, b3th.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)
He's left b3ta
because I moved in on his turf.
or something.

Personally, i think he might just be getting all grown up and married with a job and stuff.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)
I thought it was because you 'overshare and treat this place as a personal blog'
/Chompy
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:42, Reply)
i thought it was because he hates me : (

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:44, Reply)
I've warned you, I'll have none of that.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:45, Reply)
What's teh point of having a little brother if you can't embarrass him in public?
i mean, I ask you...
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:46, Reply)
It hasn't made the rest of us leave

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:46, Reply)
*cries*
Anyway, isn't that just because you're all waiting for your titgazzes?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:48, Reply)
We don't need gazzes from you
your tits pretty much make it to the end of the road.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:50, Reply)
Unfortunately
this is true : (
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:52, Reply)
I heard he lurks here and touches himself whenever she posts.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)
OMG! THATS WHAT I DO!!!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)
I heard you touch yourself whenever you think about him
which is constantly.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)
Superfly is Tricky???
fucks sake Superfly, do some fucking work
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
Like a baby

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)
A bald, geordie baby?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)
Ew no need for that mental image, sistren!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:43, Reply)
hahaha
How's he getting along with the stepchild? Have they reached an 'understanding' yet?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:45, Reply)
Totally.
Peace and quiet reigns. There you go, now you've got ME oversharing and blogging!
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:48, Reply)
Sssshh.
Don't tell Chompy.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:52, Reply)
i'm not interested in football
squash is more my kind of game.

Ooh, saying that has made me thirsty, might go and have a crusha
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)
support b3tans
Drink Crusha.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
i saw somebody made a new advert on links
i didn't watch it tho
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)
It's the actual, official advert on the telly
It was made by famous b3tan Joel Veitch. He's famous, and stuff.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
I prefer fencing

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:48, Reply)
Oh why did you go and suggest that?
She'll do it you know, she's mean like that.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:29, Reply)
sometimes they have geordies in scotland
madness, i know, but its true

just imagine the sheer incoherence of a geordie-scot conversation
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:18, Reply)
AAAAAAAAGHHHHHH!
I just tried to imagine it and it hurt my brain Quinten.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:19, Reply)
och aye da howay see you jimmy alreet man ken thats fair champion

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
Socts have their own language, i's English
mixed with alcohol
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:19, Reply)
Much like yours, it would seem
My socks don't speak to me
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
You have your own language. It's twat mixed with wanker.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
this is poor Al, you can do better

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
Yeah, but even Heston Blumenthal sometimes just likes a kebab.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:21, Reply)
that you would make a comparison between yourself and him
makes you a massive prick
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:24, Reply)
...with a hint of popping candy

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:25, Reply)
and overtones of tarragon.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:25, Reply)
SET ON FIRE WITHA BLOWTORCH AND FREEZING NITROGEN

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:25, Reply)
You can't burn Nitrogen.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)
YOU CAN IF YOU ADD OXYGEN

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)
Lithium and magnesium burn it.
You could get it to burn with oxygen but not at normal temperatures and pressures.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)
You make Nitrogen oxides when you burn petrol.
But I don't know if that counts as the nitrogen burning, it's more a by product of the fuel burning.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)
then what is nitrous oxide?
as in N2O?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)
That's an area of North London, isn't it?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)
That's where the cool kids are

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
and jews

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
All the laughing kids

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)
i thought the cool kids were in MK

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)
I was nearly stuck in MK yesterday, I felt a panic attack coming on

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
You could totally have gone to see Chompy.
What possessed you to be in MK?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
The power of cows compels you

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
I got a fucking nail in me tyre, and couldn't find the locking nut to change it to the spare. So I gamely left the services at MK and thought fuck this I'd rather die than be stuck in MK

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
I wasn't in MK until about 8pm so you would have probably missed me.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:44, Reply)
Shit dawg this was near midnight, YOU WERE TOTALLY THERE !!!!!!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:46, Reply)
Who do you think put the nail there?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:49, Reply)
it were the jews obviously

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:55, Reply)
I feel your pain

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)

pain balls

Pervert.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)
*billiards*

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:40, Reply)
It's true, I tell you.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
Very good

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
i have an arbitration there in a couple of weeks
one amazing thing about that place: it makes you fucking glad to get back to london.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
It's a bit non descript and a bit too far to commute to London from. They might have the redlands there but they can only gaze at Luton with jealousy

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:44, Reply)
I'm no chemist
But isn't it when Nitrogen molecules bond with Oxygen molecules?
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
I thought it was a rap "artiste"

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)
yes and its highly explosive
even used as rocket fuel


i'm getting tired of always being right
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)
No, it is used to oxidise rocket fuel

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
yeah so i'm right

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
No, so you are wrong
By that token, air is highly explosive as fires can be lit in it
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)
Really? shit!
Phone the Mail and start a capmpaign to stop people breathing! It's too dangerous!!!!
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:40, Reply)
thank you for helping to prove taht i was right
appreciated
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
Isn't it used to make people unconscious for operations?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
yeah that too

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
There's a lot of aye-ing all the same

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:20, Reply)
This has become tedious.
Do something entertaining.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)
*dances on table*
*falls off*
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)
That's what I'll be doing on saturday.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:37, Reply)
\o/

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)
Along with giggling and falling over.

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)
Double \o/

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:40, Reply)
Aye, well
that'll be two of us. It'll be fiiiiine.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)
I'm really, really bad at drinking.
I tend to get giggly and amorous, then fall down a lot.
It's the main reason I try to only drink at home. If I throw myself at mr b3th and fall on the floor, there's very little damage done.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:42, Reply)
apart from to his hips

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:43, Reply)
OI!
Are you calling me fat?

Oh. Oh yeah. I *am* fat. Okay, as you were.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:47, Reply)
Gordon Bennett my headache's got worse since I came back here.
I find myself longing for a BBC News link.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:52, Reply)
Are you allergic to Scotland?

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:53, Reply)
Scotland's BOSS.
But I'm spending my last day off resting as I have a headcold.
Plenty of time for more exploring when I'm better.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:55, Reply)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/england/merseyside/
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:55, Reply)
OH GO ON REMIND ME I'M MISSING THE SEA ODYSSEY!!

(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:57, Reply)
But EDINBURGH!
Exciting new job!
Sex on tap!

Forget the sea odyssey.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:58, Reply)
I am gutted to miss it though.
La Machine was amazing.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 15:59, Reply)

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