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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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So, I am sitting here waiting for someone to turn up for an appointment.
They need something from me for their client. They are 42 minutes late. How rude is that? What's the rudest most ignorant thing you have done/had done to you in the workplace?

Alt: Too early for lunch thread?

Alt alt: My mate has a car for sale that I am thinking about buying. Is this a bad idea?
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:44, Reply)
Alt alt: that's like employing friends - never a good idea.
Alt: yes

Main Q: That's frightfully rude. Have they not even called? A customer once called me a 'cunt'. Inexcusably rude, but correct.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:46, Reply)
No call or jackshit.
Called you a cunt? Hahahaha. Had you met him?
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)
It was my dad.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:48, Reply)
The car has high mileage on it but I want a cheap car that is good on the motorway.
His wife's Dad has had it from new and is an engineer so has looked after it but.....
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:49, Reply)
It's one of these isn't it?


If it isn't then it should be.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:52, Reply)
Watch your head on the seat.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:53, Reply)
hahaha!

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:54, Reply)
Sounds like Quintins mum

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:53, Reply)
I say avoid.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:53, Reply)
Already the general consensus is avoid.
Wise words I reckon.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:58, Reply)
+ n insightful

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)
So ronery.
Battered's favourite song.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:46, Reply)
No that's 'Ooh Aah, Just a Little Shit'

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:47, Reply)
Vienna
By Midge You're.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:48, Reply)
Small Town Boy by Bummerville

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:49, Reply)
I Wanna Get High - Cypress Hill

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:53, Reply)
Small Faces - Lazy Sunday Afternoon
Wouldn't it be nice, to get on with your neighbours.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:56, Reply)
You should refer yourself to "I Think I'm Gonna Kill Myself" by Elton John

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:58, Reply)
Da da da da du dah
P-p-p-puppy Power!

Let me at 'em!
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:01, Reply)
Or perhaps refer yourself to "I Wanna Be Sedated" by The Ramones

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:03, Reply)
You should refer yourself to Eminem's 'Anger Management'

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:04, Reply)
And you to "No Self-Control" by Peter Gabriel

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:06, Reply)
You should listen to Gang Starr's 'Take it Personal'

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:08, Reply)
He can't
The headphones are on a high shelf
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:09, Reply)
I Wish - Skee Lo

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:56, Reply)
Queen - Crazy Little Thing Called Battered

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:00, Reply)
Hahahah

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:00, Reply)
This means nothing to me

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:52, Reply)
very good

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:59, Reply)
Be blamed for causing problems that I had nothing to do with
when also working late and coming into work early to resolve another issue so no systems were down between 5pm and 9am - for free

Fucking cunts

Alt:
Nope

Alt Alt:
Probably as you'll feel all resentful at every issue the car has, ever.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:52, Reply)
bot dog in the server room, it's the omly way

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:54, Reply)
They were in Watford anyway
No need
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:55, Reply)
We have a similar thing here.
If you're early nothing is said. If you're late you get "Afternoon, shit the bed?".
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:55, Reply)
Hmmm
Sounds familiar
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:56, Reply)
In my previous job I was hauled up in front of my manager
for not acknowledging the personnel manager when she clocked me coming in 15 mins late. She wanted to know WHY I was late. There was no reason, I was just a bit late. She wasn't there the previous night when I finished a couple of hours past my finish time.
My manager had me make up a story about a broken alarm clock to accompany my apology to her, just to appease her need to know WHY?
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:02, Reply)
Fortunately it is just piss taking in our office

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:03, Reply)
WTF?
Stand at the door at 5.30 and when she leaves say "Half day?".
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:08, Reply)
Some people seem to be hardwired to be late
Alt: yes, but I'm hungry

altalt: if it goes wrong, there will be awkwardness all round
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:52, Reply)
What to have for lunch?
I'm fucking starving
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:55, Reply)
I am going for a pint but just necked a tuna baguette.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:57, Reply)
whatever M&S has to offer for me

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:57, Reply)
Middle aged women that now you are 38 you would actually fuck?

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:59, Reply)
I'm 30 thank you very much...
but yes
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 11:59, Reply)
There is one who works
in the knicker section that is quite tasty and I can't stop staring at her when I go in there.

The fucking tease.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:03, Reply)

knicker surgical support
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:04, Reply)
I just had to have a conversation with the extremely fit girl on the lingerie counter in John Lewis
About stocking sizes. I know she was just thinking I was buying them for myself.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:18, Reply)
Needs MOAR North Face holdall

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:20, Reply)
I blame my bloody missus
if she was 2" shorter I'd have got away with medium and then she wouldn't have been so suspicious.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:22, Reply)
That's very fucking rude, yes.
Alt: Chicken and mushroom pasta dish.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:00, Reply)
Pasta sounds good.
Home made?
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:03, Reply)
Yep
Chicken, mushroom, onion, white wine, cream, tarragon, spaghetti

Very simple, very nice. I even manage to keep the chicken moist when it's reheated.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:20, Reply)
Sorry stunned - I've been pissing about on here all morning
Be with you in about an hour.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:04, Reply)
haha!

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:10, Reply)
Grrrr.
How wude.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:18, Reply)
Thanks Woy

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:18, Reply)
Shut up Jar-Jar

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:23, Reply)
I just had to take a dump half way through a telephone interview =/
I was 50/50 of just going without saying anything, but I reckon they'd be able to hear the echo, so I asked them to call back in 5 minutes half way through. I'm not sure if this is the worst career based thing I've done in my life.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:05, Reply)
When you gotta go, you gotta go

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:10, Reply)
Yeah', exactly.
Only human, innit.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:20, Reply)
Everyone needs to go to the toilet every so often.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:11, Reply)
apart from Quint.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:14, Reply)
Also gonz, have you seen this site yet?
foodgawker.com/
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:15, Reply)
They should have called it 'Pawker'

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:16, Reply)

www.tablefortwoblog.com/2012/05/02/pw-wednesdays-carnitas-pizza/
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:22, Reply)
0o0o0o0h, I like that.
I wonder if Gawker Media have any involvement, the idea of a food pinterest sounds good. I saw something similar to that, looked almost the same in concept, but I can't remember the name. That one looks good though.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:21, Reply)
I like this

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:57, Reply)
I was gonna buy a flat off my Ma's BFFs daughter. Ma and her BFF ain't talking now because the daughter is a lying little bitch who tried to pass on a lifetime of debt with her decietful ways.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:06, Reply)
Was this the one who was in negative equity, or something?

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:20, Reply)
Had just under £20k worth mantainance stuff in the line-up over the next 3 years.
She claimed she didn't know anything about it, but c'mon, that's hardly chump change, as she "is really close friends with 3 of the flats in the same building, always coming over for coffee and a drink", would have thought someone would mention some of it. OR, at least, the letter addressed to her would have been read.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:23, Reply)
It's not unusual for people to sell if they know they have big bills coming up
but you don't do that to someone you know. It's not on. At least mention them.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:31, Reply)
The fact that I was the third buyer to pull out in the last year also leads me to believe that they knew about it.
They gave away a shitload of stuff and quit their jobs, but that was all before the exchange of contracts and even before we had the mortgage... they're idiots.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:38, Reply)
Never borrow significant amounts of money or buy cars off friends.
Surefire way to end the friendship.

Never buy an "x" off a professional "x"er. Mechanics don't maintain their cars, IT guys don't maintain their computers. Nobody likes coming home from work and having to do more fucking work, only for free this time.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:14, Reply)
Also, never 'go black', as once you have, apparently, you become unable to 'go back'.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:15, Reply)
I'd make a joke, but I have no idea what it is you do.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:19, Reply)
I heard that you're not a "man" until you'd had some "tan".

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:20, Reply)
very much so
www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-17934780
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:21, Reply)
+go

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:21, Reply)
Speaking as a true equal opportunist
I can verify this. My testicles dropped all over again.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:22, Reply)
variety is the spice of life, old boy.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:23, Reply)
I heard it's pretty crappi....

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)
I heard its up to you...

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)
I heard you need more than a finger, to go with a ....

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:41, Reply)
And trust me, you don't want to fucking touch any of my stem cells.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:17, Reply)
*trusts you*

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:17, Reply)
Mate, if I had some of your stem cells, I'd be fucking like a horse who has a 1st honors degree in something I've not heard off.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:50, Reply)
you could shove them up your cock end and shit out a hockey stick

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:55, Reply)
I bet badger once forgot his hockey stick at home, wasn't a problem for anyone except the opposing team.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, Reply)
AND he plays in goal.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, Reply)
which would be funny for skating hockey as the goalie sticks are bigger.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, Reply)
A nice dollop of asperges here Gonz

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:02, Reply)
In normal hockey they're occasionally double-bended.
I'm saying nothing.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:03, Reply)
I also recommend not 'shitting on your own doorstep'.
I mean, that's just revolting.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:17, Reply)
Never poke the payroll
Always ends badly.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:24, Reply)
Not always. That's how I met my wife.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:27, Reply)
Was she poking the payroll too?

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:29, Reply)
They high fived during and the rest is history

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:35, Reply)
she was the payroll

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:35, Reply)
Pegging ftw.

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:38, Reply)
Someone cancelled dinner as I was laying the table for them to arrive
this was because she "may" have an audition in the morning. She didn't even get the part.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:03, Reply)
It wasn't even a real audition
I just persuaded her to have sex with me on camera and then posted the video on the internet.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:05, Reply)
you should give Kroney some tips, he's 24 and still a virgin

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:08, Reply)
I never saw this coming
A star wars obsessive and a virgin
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:12, Reply)
photonic zing

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:13, Reply)
So this 'ex' of his is really some poor girl he was stalking and has managed to get an effective ex parte injunction against him
Oh Kroney you crazy virginal cat
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:16, Reply)
When he thinks about her his winky stands up and he says
"make it grow..."
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:17, Reply)
It was a girl he fingered on the dancefloor in Lloyds one saturday in Slough
He reffered to her as his girlfriend for 6 months before they spoke and she said she already had a boyfriend.
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:17, Reply)
quintin will bw well pissed off
He'll probably get the "Langley Cru" together to kick his arse
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:25, Reply)
i don't know who to punch
WHO THE FUCK DO I PUNCH?
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:26, Reply)
Kroney fingered your girfriend

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:27, Reply)
where is he? I'll have him

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:28, Reply)
I just saw him coming out of the bogs at the "Crooked Billet" with some bird
and he was sniffing his fingers
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:31, Reply)
The smell of success

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:31, Reply)
did she have pirate hoops and a tan-gerine glow?

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:32, Reply)
She did have scurvy

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:33, Reply)
thats odd, she'd been gargling my piss for months

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:37, Reply)
Needs more Vit C

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:38, Reply)
i covered 9 days for a girl then i went into hospital and i needed a 3hr shift covered and she refused
She's a fucking stupid cunt bitch
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:19, Reply)
cunt punch, it's the only recourse

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:22, Reply)
Sage words on the internet

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:32, Reply)
errr, no
you're a mug
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:27, Reply)
nah, im single and without children so available to cover
Its mildly irritating :however she should be responsible instead of being a fucking selfish bitch
Matters nowt now, she's been sacked for thievery
Because she's a stupid cunt bitch
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:33, Reply)
Cunt punch, just to make sure

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:33, Reply)
christ it's staggering to a slow lame death on here today
in the workplace? when i was barmaiding, i had the most horrific party of about 40 pre-menopausal women in the back room. i ran around getting their entire drinks order together, took it in on one tray after another, and as i took in the last tray, one of them clicked her fingers and said: OI, BARGIRL. SAME AGAIN, EH? and they didn't even tip me. rancid cunts.

out of the workplace? how long have you got (about 2 inches, knowing you, stunned).

alt: not by 2pm. i had my rice salad from m&s.

altalt: not if you get it checked by a third party expert
(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:52, Reply)
New THREAD

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 13:53, Reply)
it was lunch time you silly bitch

(, Thu 3 May 2012, 14:06, Reply)

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