Last day of my old job, I start a new one on Monday
I wasn't malicious or anything, shaken hands with that cunt of an old boss, left with a grimace/smile on my face.

But I've realised I might have left my lunch of Seafood medley. Should I go back for it? I didn't put it in the fridge for fear of food thieves, It's in my special hiding place near a source of heating.

Am I bad?

Alt: Passive/aggressive last/any days of work.
Alt/Alt: Seafood
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:25, Reply)

seafood medley sounds disgusting
However I could smash the fuck out of some crab legs right now
( K Swizz all my bells are ringing, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:35, Reply)

I made it especially for my last day of work.

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:37, Reply)

You're so lolwaki.

( SteveFrench What's it all aboot eh?, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:45, Reply)

alt
in the early days of popular internet access (1998ish) I worked in a soulless office. One of my jobs was to work on a database on a computer in the basement surrounded by CCTV cameras (it was a small security firm). One day my boss asked me "..if I wanted to search for something..um..um..like other security firms how would I do it?" I explained search engines, he seemed happy. Next day I went to work more CCTV cameras were on and there were interesting entries in the internet history (which I'd not explained) a couple of hours after closing. When I left, I had to leave instructions for everyone on how to use things. These included some pretty detailed instructions on checking and deleting internet history.
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:45, Reply)

I hope you blackmailed a raise out of him?

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:47, Reply)

nah
I was only there 6 months then buggered off to London for that sorry chapter of my life
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:48, Reply)

If you LARP'ed as a thieve not a mage you would have gained valuble XP points

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:49, Reply)

I'd never heard of LARPing till the other day.
God, there's some sad gits out there.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:52, Reply)

*waves*

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:01, Reply)

I'm not a mage!

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:01, Reply)

Is it coincidental that Quinten disappeared soon after CQ?

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:47, Reply)

Hi Batts
Can we all come and give you the bumps on Sunday?
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:48, Reply)

If you think you can lift me 39 times then by all means proceed.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:49, Reply)

I thought we only had to do it 19.5 times.

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:53, Reply)

I can't tell when you are standing up ot lying down.
Which is why our sex life is so great.
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:54, Reply)

Any more of that and I'll use less lube on you tonight.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:56, Reply)

Can you get any less?

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:56, Reply)

What is it with blue namers joining in on meme's that they know nothing about?

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:00, Reply)

Oi, be nice don't flounce on me.
I woulnd't speak of you if i didn't like you.

Seriously have a great B-day.
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:03, Reply)

Angry sex.
Is there any other kind?

Do you know what your Mrs has got you as a pressie?
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:57, Reply)

Apple TV amongst other things.
Compared to the £10,000 I am spending on her eternity ring for our wedding anniversary I am making a large trading loss.
( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:59, Reply)

Hahaha. Always the fucking way.
Apple TV - nice. I am not a gadget man but they look cool.
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:06, Reply)

And she's buying my present out of the £4k a month I give her to cover the bills, her pension contributions, items for the house etc.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:07, Reply)

Are you going to collect your birthday blowie?

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:08, Reply)

I shall jam it in her regardless of if she likes it or not.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:10, Reply)

I think he's getting Cocking lessons

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:10, Reply)

Sorry EDIT: COOKING

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Four fucking grand?
Jesus fucking H Christ. I either need a better job or a sugar daddy.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:12, Reply)

I've got pictures of his wife and she aint worth 400 a month let alone 4k.
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:28, Reply)

Enough of that thank you.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:29, Reply)

I could post them and we could have a poll?
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:30, Reply)

400 what?

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:39, Reply)

groats
(ThunderCuntThePendejo officially less shit than NakedApe, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:40, Reply)

Whats the exchange rate on that?
Ask cavy she'll know
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:42, Reply)

They're shit and buggy unless you only have apple products connected to your network.

(PsychoChomp Nakkers, btw I'm probably calling you a cunt, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:11, Reply)

Which we do at home, I use my ipad & my wife has a Mac. I rarely connect my Lenovo at home.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:12, Reply)

Shouldn't be a problem try getting it to work with a NAS drive and you'll want to throw it into the sun.

(PsychoChomp Nakkers, btw I'm probably calling you a cunt, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:17, Reply)

Lets do some roleplay
you pretend to be your wife, I'll pretend to be you.
Now ask me for a £10k ring and I'll show you the correct response.
(PsychoChomp Nakkers, btw I'm probably calling you a cunt, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:10, Reply)

I was once The Lord of Her Ring.

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:12, Reply)

Wotcher Chompy

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:12, Reply)

i can't imagine
a time when someone would want to spend that much on a ring. Is it magic? Does it come from Sauron?
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:13, Reply)

It's fucking vulgur.
You can travel round the world for that.
(PsychoChomp Nakkers, btw I'm probably calling you a cunt, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:15, Reply)

We need a Lisa Standsfield link to go with that

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:18, Reply)

Every thread could be improved by a Lisa Stansfield link.

(PsychoChomp Nakkers, btw I'm probably calling you a cunt, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:25, Reply)

Worst Lisa Standfield link ever was Steve 'Wacky' Wright on TOTP2. 'That was Billy Bragg's haunting and moving 'Between The Wars', I bumped into Lisa Stansfield in the BBC corridors the other day, she had a new haircut, i didn't recognise her, here she is singing...'

Fucking idiot.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:16, Reply)

it's all relative innit
the value doesn't matter, it's how much time and thought they've put into choosing something that they thought you'd like.

however, if you know they earn a fortune and they have spent pennies, that will not bode well for future happiness. same if they earn a povvo salary but have spent money on a ring instead of a deposit for a house or a car or something sensible.
( rachelswipe can't tell the difference between battered & dozer, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:26, Reply)

I wouldn't be comfortable wearing something of that value though
even when I went engagement ring shopping with my best mate, all the ones I liked were under a grand.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:29, Reply)

Good girl.
Cheap date.
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:30, Reply)

Cheap date and easily pleased
are not the same thing.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:34, Reply)

It's the little things in life that matters.........
Ohhhhh... by the way have you met Battered
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:36, Reply)

Is he a dwarf or something?
I seem to have missed out on this piss take, meh.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:37, Reply)

I never mentioned overcompensating once

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:39, Reply)

Yes
he's taller than I am.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:38, Reply)

cheap!
ummm, £1000 still sounds like a fuckload to me. There are better things to spend £1000 on. Cameras for example
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:39, Reply)

Wine.

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:41, Reply)

3 months' salary innit?

( rachelswipe can't tell the difference between battered & dozer, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:45, Reply)

I thought that was just a myth propagated by jewellery companies
trying to screw more money out of people? It's supposed to be about the emotion and intent behind it, not the size of the rock. If I met someone I genuinely thought I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, he could propose with an onion ring and it wouldn't matter.
/hippy
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:48, Reply)

i think de beers started the myth
in theory i agree with you. in flippancy, i am obliged to point out that nobody with any brains would want to spend the rest of their lives with a twit who couldn't even afford a decent ring, so it's academic...
( rachelswipe can't tell the difference between battered & dozer, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:54, Reply)

'Decent' is relative, though

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:58, Reply)

*waves*
I give poverty a bad name
( Kroney Nyommy beaver anal glands nyomnyomnyom, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:06, Reply)

BON JOVI'S LESS SUCCESSFUL OLOLOLOLOLOL

( Kroney Nyommy beaver anal glands nyomnyomnyom, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:06, Reply)

money is that important to you?
I wouldn't want a waster (again) but being broke doesn't necessarily mean a waster
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:11, Reply)

i was joking
but i kind of agree. it has nothing to do with family money or what they earn now. it has everything to do with drive, brains, ambition and being hard-working.
( rachelswipe can't tell the difference between battered & dozer, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:12, Reply)

phew

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:13, Reply)

Almost certainly.
I can't believe Quinten is anyone who also posts here regularly as someone else. If it is, they are borderline schizophrenic.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:55, Reply)

No.

( Davros' Granddad STOP BEING SO REASONABLE!, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:06, Reply)

If it does turn out that CQ is Quinten then I take my metaphorical hat off to him
because it must have taken a monumental effort to keep that up with such a distinctive style for so long.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:21, Reply)

Only the people with mutiple accounts accuse others of being puppets.

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:24, Reply)

whoever smelt it, dealt it

( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:14, Reply)

hartley hare has been gazzing me asking me to bully battered
i'm not sure why he hates battered so much :/
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:16, Reply)

Yep bully him
Bully him where the sun don't shine.

PS your the 1st one of 32 I gazzed to do the same
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:19, Reply)

You didn't gaz me yer cunt.

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:23, Reply)

you're my enemy as well, i need to make a list

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:25, Reply)

Look on the bugs and features request page for a laugh.

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:26, Reply)

the what?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:27, Reply)

There are more boards on here than you can count Q.

( Bartleby I am sir, your disobedient servant., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:29, Reply)

i'm scared

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:29, Reply)

To find out who's naughty or nice

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:26, Reply)

Hide it behind the radiator,
and stink the office out.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:48, Reply)

Already hidded in several places.
Not very original on my part, but I did have the shame of having to ask for Crabsticks, EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:51, Reply)

Prole food.
They're not even crab FFS.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:53, Reply)

Hence the shame ;(

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:54, Reply)

Not crab? What are they made of?

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:54, Reply)

They are made out of crab
in the same way that sausages are made of pork and chicken nuggets are made out of chicken.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 15:59, Reply)

Are you having a pop?

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:06, Reply)

Not at all
I'm saying that povvo foods are generally made out of ears and arseholes. I used to work in a food testing lab.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Povvo food? I lurve crab sticks.
I first had them at Rick Stein's place in Padstow.
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:09, Reply)

They're like a pork pie in that they're only tasty if you don't know what you're eating
but then, I don't like pork pies either.
(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:11, Reply)

The shittest of all the hats.

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:13, Reply)

I look better in cloche.

(berk no mistakes no misbehaving, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:15, Reply)

Very '30's.
My pink cowboy hat suited you. *euphemismlols*
(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:27, Reply)

Desmond's ahhhh the good old days

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:17, Reply)

Get a room you two.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Kamaboko apparently.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crab_stick
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:04, Reply)

there used to be a guy round here
who would wander round all the pubs with a basket of various snacks including crabsticks.
( Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:02, Reply)

Generally selling room temperature crap seafood to drunks.
We see them occasionally.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:04, Reply)

We get that all the time in Sarf Lahndan.

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:08, Reply)

You don't live in south London, you live in the outer suburbs, as you're a povvo.

( Battered Nobody wants to buy your drugs here Louis, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:09, Reply)

I live in SE13, thank you so very much Mr Verne Troyer.

(Set your faces to Stunned. Bon viveur, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:11, Reply)

SOCCERBALL TIME

( hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 16:59, Reply)

\o/
*woo hoos*

I fucking love football, me. Not as much as Barry does (he LOVES football) but it's rather a shame my national team is too abjectly shit to ever qualify for anything.
I was stunned and surprised to see one of the host nations score the opening goal of the tournament.
Also, I keep giggling at the name 'Papadopolous', and I really don't know why.
( b3th None of the mod power, all the calories, Fri 8 Jun 2012, 17:24, Reply)