Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob Hello, I'm a board sig., Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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DID YOU KNOWIn North Vietnam, they have four seasons, as we do here. In South Vietnam, they have only two; "Sunny" and "Rainy". Or, to tourists, "Fucking hot" and "Slightly less fucking hot with occasional thunderstorms".
I believe that in this country we actually only have two seasons, "Shite" which runs October to April and "Mostly shite with one or two days a month of sun". What would you change about British traditions?
Alt: b3tan snog, marry, kill
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 16:52, Reply)
What was worse was when you got backand didn't even recieve a hero's welcome.
The cunts.
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Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:12,
Reply)
for snog marry kill don't you have to suggest three people and then we chose who gets what?(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 16:57, Reply)
hahahahagenuine LOL
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rachelswipe if you logged out to read this, you're a twat, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 16:59,
Reply)
you're a sexually incompetent spastic with the dong of a 2 month old boxer puppy(
rachelswipe if you logged out to read this, you're a twat, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:06,
Reply)
i need something to laugh atand your posts aren't it
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rachelswipe if you logged out to read this, you're a twat, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:11,
Reply)
so imagining my genitals,a nd those of baby dogs entertains you?how long has this been going on swipe?
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:12, Reply)
The more pertinant questions here run thus:"Why a two month old Boxer puppy, specifically? Do they have smaller dongs than other two month old puppies and how did you come by this information?"
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:15,
Reply)
I was suggesting you pick any three you likebut as you ask...
Swipey
Monty
Battered
GO
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 16:59, Reply)
I'd bang Monty, bang Battered and bang Swipey. Do I win five pounds?
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:00, Reply)
there's this song right'swords of a thousand men' its REALLY good, i like it, you used to hear it at parties, you should google it
what you said sounds a bit like that
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:08, Reply)
Just youtubed itshit song, shit video, shit hair and shit quality, they should have recorded it to MP3
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:15, Reply)
On a massive banjolele.(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:16,
Reply)
What's wrong with you, you Deacon?(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:13,
Reply)
give it a listenits not as bad as that hawkwind stuff baldmonkey likes
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:14, Reply)
You've answered your own question, here.(
Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:14,
Reply)
* lubes up and bends over *(
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:23,
Reply)
oh god why did you have to make it SO hard???I'd snog battered, marry monty and kill swipe
I'd rather not snog battered, but if i marry monty i could snog him every day
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:01, Reply)
Always thinking.I like that.
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Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:13,
Reply)
Hey hey.Someone tell me not to fall asleep. I'm fucking hanging here.
Given those choices, I'd marry swipe (never have money worries), kill Monty (it's the kindest thing), which leaves me in the unfortunate position of shagging Battered.
Of course, he could just say no.
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b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:03,
Reply)
Well if it's all in proportionyou probably wouldn't feel anything anyway
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:05, Reply)
Oh my.Do I ever feel foolish now.
Sorry, man. I'm just so fucking knackered I didn't even read the question properly.
I shall immediately DMAAKM
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b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:07,
Reply)
Make the most of itSore knees aren't a problem when you don't need to kneel down to give a woman head
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:06, Reply)
And probably wouldn't be the last...(
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:00,
Reply)
Swipe - sexeh tiemsSwipe - loverly times
Swipe - It didn't work out :(
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:01, Reply)
alt:stunned/monty (they come as a package), badger, the rest i'd line up so one bullet went through all their skulls (easy as there's nothing inside)
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rachelswipe if you logged out to read this, you're a twat, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:03,
Reply)
she wants to shoot holes in your hollow head, naked apeits all there in black and grey
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:09, Reply)
And red.Lots and lots of red.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:11,
Reply)
KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLY(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:11, Reply)
not ape's headhe is safe. he is not in the Q of people to be shot (see what i did there? there's a CLUE)
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rachelswipe if you logged out to read this, you're a twat, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:12,
Reply)
I'm terribly hurt swipe :(Though I'm going to assume its on gender preference in which case right on
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:14,
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eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!*tells EVERYONE, shops for wedding dresses, starts dieting*
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:10, Reply)
What do you mean, 'starts'?Every other fucking post you write is beakering about dieting.
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b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:12,
Reply)
I'm one pound off losing a stoneit's taken me 6 weeks
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:15,
Reply)
Congrats honeyHang on... your tits haven't shrunk, have they?!?!?!
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:17, Reply)
not yetbut if I keep going, you never know!
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:18,
Reply)
tits on a whaleare not that much of an advantage
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:19,
Reply)
Don't put yourself downLosing a stone is well worth being proud of
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:20, Reply)
I did it in ten.Only another stone and a half to go...
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b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:16,
Reply)
6 is my absolute outside cos that's when I'm going to ItalyWhere I will definitely put it back on
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:17, Reply)
What if you don't fit into your bridesmaid dress?What will you do then?
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b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:18,
Reply)
Find a cheap backstreet Italian liposuctionist and offer him a blowie(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:20, Reply)
a blowie for a suckie(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:22,
Reply)
if i can choose all threei'd snog sportscow, marry mmps and kill battered to make the world a safer place
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:11, Reply)
evening!well isn't that interesting. I wish there were less football matches.
snog marry, kill,eh? There's more in kill than the rest, really. How many pints are we talking for the snog one?
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:15,
Reply)
I reckon up to a two pinterany more than that and you're veering into "shag" territory, which is outside the bounds of this particular version of the game.
Kroney; rules lawyer.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:17,
Reply)
2 pints inI'd probably snog anyone... is K around, we can go back to sexistly oggling labs
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:19,
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actually more accurately2 pints in I'd *consider* snogging anyone. Then wouldn't.
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:21,
Reply)
After 2 I'm anybody'sAfter 6 I'm everybody's.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:31,
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I could defend you with my sword fighting and archery skillz(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:20,
Reply)
Alt: Jeff, Stunned Poster and Bill.'KILL BILL' DO YOU GET IT????????????
PS soz Lusty, bros before really nice girlfriends, as the saying goes.
Wuv wooo x x x x x x x x
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Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:15,
Reply)
chaps before flaps(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:18,
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Turds before birds.(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:21,
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Gits before tits.(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:29,
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Ouch.Bit soon, yeah? Bit raw, yeah? What did I do to you anyway?
Fucker.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:29,
Reply)
LTI you big girly fluffy twatty gayYes, I said that! Me! Darth Foxtrot!
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:18, Reply)
Christ alive.(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:18,
Reply)
Not for about two thousand years, if ever.(
b3th You're gonna need a bigger mod, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:19,
Reply)
You also mention Madam Marlboro, who hasn't been on here for donkeys.Old school, dude.
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Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:33,
Reply)
He's so old skool he got her name wrong(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:39,
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Worra doylum, eh readers?(
Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:18,
Reply)
Snog: Berk
Marry: BGB
Kill: Quinten and I had any bullets left I'd attempt to murdern PD.
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Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:20,
Reply)
Neither have Iand I'm not even worth killing, apparently. Unless you include swipe's random shooting.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:28,
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yeah, but Quentin would marry meI'm not sure I win
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:28,
Reply)
it would be a fantasy LARP wedding, not real world weddingi'd be king and you'd be queen of my yard
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:29, Reply)
oh excellentso I could then kill you off and rule your kingdom. I see, now it makes more sense
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:31,
Reply)
Good point, I obviously have no impact whatsoever on these peoples livesI am grey, i am drizzle, I am Belgium :(
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:29, Reply)
We're Coventry :((
Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:31,
Reply)
IN ENGLAND I AM JOHHHNNNNNNN(
Monty Boyce Dignity is having the stones to dress in lycra, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:42,
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They also fucked Belgium. Twice.They're probably not the best standard to judge by as they're obviously slags.
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Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:34,
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are you hot?(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:28,
Reply)
mehI'm tall and slim with a good thick head of hair and strong eyebrows
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:29, Reply)
you sound like you're describing lifestockyou can go on the maybe pile
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:31,
Reply)
It's your glossy mane and strong teeth she likes.(
Kroney Dignity is having the stones to dress in hemp, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:33,
Reply)
My teeth are strongbut you should never look a gift Ape in the mouth
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:34, Reply)
because they'll bite your nose off(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:35,
Reply)
I am upset that Battered would seek to kill meI thought we totes cleared the air.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:48, Reply)
secretly you're just happy to get the attention(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:48,
Reply)
No ocean, sea, lake or mere could quench the burning rage inside that man(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:52, Reply)
ironic, since he could drown in a puddle(
Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:53,
Reply)
Problem is the rage has been crushed down to such a small pointThat fusion has begun in the extreme gravity, not even light can escape the rage singularity now.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:57, Reply)
Please translate this in to English. Thanks. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:59,
Reply)
I am extremely calm and relaxed. I am on day two of my 3 week break. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 17:56,
Reply)
Certainly. If you can see over the bar sufficiently to buy me one. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:09,
Reply)
If you knew how much grey hair I have you'd know that wouldn't be a problem. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:18,
Reply)
Alt: scaryduck all three.I'd snog, marry then kill, with my inheritance I would create MOD of the week, that would be something worth voting for (MOD power will only last one week and damage undone after said week).
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:25,
Reply)
Shut up and fuck off. Bellend. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:37,
Reply)
snog becky letters Marry Gonz
Kill Ape for the lulz
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K Swizz all my bells are ringing, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 18:30,
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I'd change the idiotic notion of letting TVs show sports in barsAlt: I'm not sure, I'll give it a think and let you know
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:12,
Reply)
I read that as sports bra's(
hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:18,
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We're all b3tansNone of us have a need for sports bras
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:20,
Reply)
lots of pubs rely on that to bring in businessMaybe you should just go to pubs or bars which don't show sport.
(, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:18, Reply)
Dozer did you like the irony of how battered told me to shut up and fuck off,Just as he shut up and fucked off.
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:20,
Reply)
I like watching the telly in the pub.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:20,
Reply)
I like fisting your mother. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:23,
Reply)
*waves*I knew you would be back
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:24,
Reply)
With your midget features, she likens it to being fingered by a real man.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:24,
Reply)
Just as she was about to cum the other day she started to tell me how much she liked watching you being penetrated by your PE teacher when you were at junior school. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:36,
Reply)
This is all manner of wrong.Hang on, I'll gaz you a e-mail address as I said I would following our conversation last Saturday.
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JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:39,
Reply)
...so i can tell you more about what your mother likes. (
Battered I was Agent Orange, Special Agent Orange, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:40,
Reply)
I don't really care either wayBut I had to pick something
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:23,
Reply)
That's fair enough.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:25,
Reply)
How are you doing?Also I will say sports are infinitely better than having shit pop music blasted through speakers.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:28,
Reply)
Long day, so I'm looking at contracting opportunities and trying to avoid buying shit I don't need.Yourself?
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JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:29,
Reply)
Not bad thanksHoping to hear back from this job * crosses fingers.* what are you avoiding buying?
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:36,
Reply)
Shirts, t-shirts, jeans, trainers, shoes, jumpers....The usual sort of thing.
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JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:39,
Reply)
*sad five*Know the feeling.
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:41,
Reply)
I heard the whole compliance industry had gone gay.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:43,
Reply)
Plum your the one from York ain't you?(
hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:45,
Reply)
Anymore thought's about a York B4SH?I like "Ye Olde Starre Inne" been about a year since I last was there
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:49,
Reply)
Looks like you've pulled PD(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:51,
Reply)
I'm quite the catch I'll have you know(
hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:51,
Reply)
I haven't actuallyWhat does it mostly entail? ( unless this is a joke I'm not getting because I'm tired.)
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:54,
Reply)
It depends on what area you're looking at.I used to have to do compliance monitoring visits on projects to ensure they were meeting the terms and conditions of their contracts, then take appropriate financial recovery action if they weren't.
I suspect Dozer is leaning more towards general financial and business regulation; everything above board and according to the law. Or something.
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Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:01,
Reply)
I've let myself down.I've just ordered two pairs of shoes.
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JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:10,
Reply)
Two left, two right.(
Davros' Granddad Monty, could you grow up and have a life? Kthxbai., Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:19,
Reply)
Clarks have a sale one.So a pair of Wallabee Race and a pair of Wallabee Run.
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JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:28,
Reply)
OMG Wallabee's they back in?(
hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:33,
Reply)
You pay for them and I'll wear 'em.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:44,
Reply)
Not yet, I was going to sort that out this weekend.(
JeffTheDogFucker JeffStock III - Now in the calendar, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:43,
Reply)
I think your going to the wrong pubs, just saying(
hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:30,
Reply)
FOR FUCKS SAKEFUCK OFF, RAIN
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:52,
Reply)
evening harewhat you been rabbitin about today?
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:53,
Reply)
Well I've been verbally attacked by a borrower.But I think my snog, marry, kill idea was the best. dead modest me aint I? Scroll up about 20 posts to see it.
Edit 40+
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:56,
Reply)
it's clearly geniusbut for one thing - I don't think b3ta is based on a monarchistic ruling family
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Citizen Cavy is reporting your crimes to the great leader on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 19:59,
Reply)
Damn, 8(I still think it would be a good idea.
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hartley hare is shaking his Caxirola on, Tue 3 Jul 2012, 20:00,
Reply)
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