I have never been told this
but I wish I had.

When choosing an interweb community to become part of, find one that sucks. Cos if you find a good one, you'll miss it when you have do go and do a proper days work..

*cries*
( ancrenne doesn't eat anything that can play video games, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 8:52, closed)

Ahhh.....!
Poor ancrenne, I feel your pain.
( Monkeysex got the baddies and killed the girl, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 8:54, closed)

What is this
'proper day's work' you speak of?
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 8:55, closed)

But I was already here..?

( Monkeysex got the baddies and killed the girl, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:03, closed)

Hang about
I just suggested to a certain sexmonkey in another guise to come over here, and see that he already has.

*feels daft for not realising*

*concedes first point of the day to Bert Marlsex*
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:04, closed)

Advantage Monkeysex

*takes off top*
( Monkeysex got the baddies and killed the girl, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:04, closed)

*observes Bert's topless self*
*averts gaze rapidly*

Not what I was expecting from you, Madame!
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:06, closed)

Hi everyone.
I overslept this morning. I was having a dream about alien invasion and the only thing I can remember is that the aliens were perticularly fond of olives.
( big-girl's-blouse should stay away from red wine, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:11, closed)

Olives? OLIVES?!
Kill them! Kill the inhuman bastards and their little green and black shiny things of foulness!
(Hairus Pottus ULLAdubULLA, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:14, closed)

What?
what's going on with Bert?

Bert, you know what happens when you change your username don't you.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:23, closed)

mmm, olives
I once had a dream that giant ants with machine guns in their mouths had invaded the earth.

to counter this, me and the spice girls stole carol vorderman's car and drove to Portsmouth.

I honestly dreamt that. I was pretty confused when I woke up.
( Vipros like a fighterjet made out of biceps, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:24, closed)

I'm with Hair Pot
Olives are one of the few foodstuffs I just don't like. Vile, greasy little blobs.

Oh, and hello, Hair Pot. Haven't seen you around here before.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:28, closed)

I had a dream
Last night.

I dreamed that I was trapped in a house made of frozen meat.
I tried to get out by leaning on the door and defrosting it with my bodyheat, but I got frozen to it, and slowly absorbed as part of the meat.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:30, closed)

@Kaol
Spend a bit more time with ancrenne and you'll be dreaming of puppies and icecream and cushions and dirty sex.
( big-girl's-blouse should stay away from red wine, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:36, closed)

Oh Kaol
you worry me, but in a good way.

*warms frozen meat door Kaol with body heat*
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:37, closed)

@K2K6
I'm not a prolific poster. And I just changed my screen name to something a little better than what it was. I prefer just to lurk and read in the many posters gloriousness that is QOTW of the week. And now I will stop rambling.

BURN THE OLIVES!
(Hairus Pottus ULLAdubULLA, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:37, closed)

@Kaol
Didn't you have your 'cutting through frozen meat' knife handy?

@Hair Pot - what did you used to be called?
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:39, closed)

It was a dream
So no, I didn't :(

BGB - You're assuming that I don't have dreams like that anyway?
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:42, closed)

Good advice.
Have a click.

Morning everyone.

@K2k6: Nice linkage!
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:43, closed)

Morning spakka
Thought I'd better do the linkage, seeing as you weren't around earlier.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:48, closed)

I dreamt last night that I was afloat in a sea of smashed ambition.
Not really. I dreamt that I won a million dollars in a casino. But it was one of those really real dreams, and I was most disappointed when I awoke to find I didn't have half a million quid in the bank.

Stupid brain. Stupid dreams.

EDIT: MORNING!
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:48, closed)

Morning folks
I don't remember any dreams from last night.

*feels left out*
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:50, closed)

BK
If it helps, I woke up in a cold sweat from mine, heart pounding.
So you didn't miss out on much.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:53, closed)

I dreamt
that spimf got his bloody icon at last and didn't have to rant on about it any more.

And whaddayaknow.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:54, closed)

@Kaol
Ah, good.
I feel better now.
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:55, closed)

.
I used to hate olives with a passion when I was a kid. But I once read a series of books about an alien invasion with aliens who were fond of Ginger.

@Kaol: Nice escape-plan. Pity it backfired. But glad you used the old "transfer yourself to an alternate reality" escape.

@K2k6: Glad to hear that others are doing the linkage. I might actually try and curb my b3tadiction so having another linker would be handy.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:57, closed)

Meh...
I had one of those pathetic conversational dreams, where it's just like real life. I hate those, it feels like you've been awake while asleep, and not in a good way (like lucid dreaming).

No purple hefalumps or anything.
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 9:58, closed)

Lucid dreaming
With me, every time I realise I'm in a dream, I quickly wake up. There was one exception. When I was still at school, I dreamt I was wandering around the schoolgrounds with a friend. All of a sudden, I realised I was dreaming. I wanted to test to see if I was omnipotent. To do this, I tried creating a volcano in the school football-field (I was inspired by Populous). Might have had a bit of success but it wasn't anywhere near as spectacular as I had hoped. I soon drifted back into a more dreamlike state and my dream continued as normal.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:12, closed)

Last night I dreamt I was Kaol
so I had a good time eating fish and cuddling pandas, just to annoy him.
( clendrix You like wood? Well eat this, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:19, closed)

Dammit!
That's why I feel rubbish this morning is it?
You've been off prancing about in my body, have you?
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:24, closed)

I have!
You've been wearing heels and pink lipstick. A man commented on your boobs. It's been fun!
( clendrix You like wood? Well eat this, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:26, closed)

Great...
I feel soiled and abused now.
Thanks a lot.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:28, closed)

In fairness Kaol
You would look shit hot in heels and pink lipstick.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:29, closed)

Morning Clendrix, al
How are we this overcast morning?
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:31, closed)

I'm now worried about tonight's dream
in which Kaol gets into clendrix's body (so to speak) and turns her into a knife-wielding, frowning goat abuser.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:31, closed)

I've corrected your typo...
In fairness Kaol you would look shit hot in heels and pink lipstick.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:32, closed)

I do feel mildly abused
but that's not comething to complain about.

Hello BK! How are your drums?
( clendrix You like wood? Well eat this, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:35, closed)

@Clendrix
Of the air variety until I can save some cash unfotunately.

Keeping the arms up with Sonic and Mario Olympics on the Wii. *flexes*
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:36, closed)

Mornin' new arrivals
I wonder if we should do a b3ta "posess another b3tan's body" session sometime.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:36, closed)

Morning BK
I am busy busy busy, so can't post much more.

But am very very excited as I'm off to Wembley to see Def Leppard and Whitesnake tonight.

*dances like a cheesy 80's rock obsessed loon*
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:39, closed)

@BK
*swoons*
( clendrix You like wood? Well eat this, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:40, closed)

@al
The rather foxy lass in my office went to see them a few nights back. Whitesnake have seen better days apparantly. She enjoyed it nontheless.
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:41, closed)

Is it just me
or does anyone else think of Burger King when they see the initials BK?

Sorry Boss!
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:41, closed)

@Clendrix
Bless you, I feel good about myself now!

*hugs*
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:44, closed)

@K2k6
I noticed that myself.
I'm worried that everyone thinks I look like late-period Elvis.
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:45, closed)

@BK *hugs back*
@ K2k6 - yes

@everyone - offline for a few hours now

*trembles*
*feels sick*

See you later!
( clendrix You like wood? Well eat this, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:46, closed)

@BK
yeah, it's not really Whitesnake, it's David Coverdale and a bunch of session musicians.

And his face does look like a old leather boot.

Still looking forward to it. How often do you get the chance to sing along to "Is This Love?" and "Here I Go Again"
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:47, closed)

See you later C
May go offline myself at some point.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:49, closed)

@al
Not that often, I'd wager.
I didn't even know they were still a going concern, even if it is Coverdale and Acolytes.
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:50, closed)

I'm very excited.
I've just discovered what the two buttons at the side of my mouse do. I've only had this new mouse for 3 months.

I am sooooo not a geek.
( big-girl's-blouse should stay away from red wine, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:50, closed)

@al
Ever since you mentioned Whitesnake I've had Here I Go Again buzzing round my head.

Which I have to say isn't a bad thing. Much better than a lot of the crap on the radio these days.

/old bastard mode
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:50, closed)

@BGB
You can set up your mouse buttons to do whatever you want them to.

(Well, within reason - they're not going to do your laundry or anything)

No idea how you do it on a PC though. Somewhere in the control panel, I'd guess.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:52, closed)

Well
I don't know where i'm going,
But I still know where I've been,
hangin' on the promises,
of the songs of yesterday,
and i've made up my mind,
I ain't wasting no more time!

*headbangs*
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:54, closed)

@K2K6
Give me a year or two of getting used to the way they are now and then I may think about attempting that.

I had a bit of a rock period in my life. I even had a Whitesnake album. I'm back on my 'men with long hair' phase so I may have to dig it out again.

Guns and roses rocked my world for a while.
( big-girl's-blouse should stay away from red wine, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:55, closed)

@BGB
my side button go back and forward on web pages and my computer.

If I right click, it does my laundry (yeah that's right K2k6, let's see your mac do that then!)
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:55, closed)

I like mice with lots of buttons
Sometimes, I feel like an overlord in a control-tower. The more buttons I have to press, the more things I have control of.

I feel pity for the Mac-using overlords and their one-buttoned mice.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 10:56, closed)

Excuse me
but my new Mac has a multi-buttoned mouse* which does left and right clicks, centre clicking of the 2-axis scroll ball and a side squeezy button thingy too.

_{Although the old laptop I'm using just now makes do with one button. But it gives me a blowjob from time to time.}

*But I have most of it disabled as I keep doing things I don't mean to do. It's like flying a bloody helicopter.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:02, closed)

buttons pah!
I have the normal two, the side two, but not only that, my mouse wheel can click left and right too

I can't set it up to do anything on my work computer, but that's beside the point

ooo, the other thing I found yesterday is that my wireless keyboard has enough range to skip tracks in itunes from the toilet.

welcome to the future!
( Vipros like a fighterjet made out of biceps, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:03, closed)

Well,
I discovered my phone's predictive text recognises 'Dustin Hoffman'.
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:09, closed)

I hate Thursdays.
Seriously, every Thursday, with the exception of last one, tends to be rubbish.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:17, closed)

But user interfaces on Mac software
would still have to take into account the one-buttoned design. I like my context-menus.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:18, closed)

Speaking of Thursdays
Anyone want to place bets to what the next QOTW will be? I predict it's this one.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:21, closed)

@spakka
They do. Ctrl+left click is the same as right click, although less convenient, of course. Even as a long time Apple fan, I don't know why they didn't appreciate the merits of multi buttoned rodents a long time ago.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:22, closed)

@ Spakka
I was hoping it'd be the spoooky tales one! *lights torch under chin*

@ Kaol - Thursdays are rubbish because they're duplicitous. They pretend to be the weekend, but are actually hiding behind the mask of Friday. Thursdays are cunts.

Except last Thursday. Last Thursday ruled.
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:24, closed)

@spakka
I hope it isn't that one.
It'll get boring by Monday.
It'll be like the Innuendo one, lots of short posts, no meaty posts.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:25, closed)

Ctrl+left click
I thought Macs had a special key you press down with the mousebutton to emulate a right-click. The app I'm working on is designed to be multi-platform and I had used Shift+Left-click to emulate a right-click (CTRL+Left-click emulates a middle-click).
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:26, closed)

@Kaol
In that case, I might get some work done.

Also, I think that suggestion is very much in the spirit of QOTW. It brings out the worse in us in an honest kind of way.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:28, closed)

@ DiT
You want my Tales of the Unexplained?
*grins*
That'd be a wicked one, I've got a LOT of stories.
Some of them may or may not be down to my insane hallucinations.

Last Thursday did indeed rock!
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:30, closed)

@Spakka
No, it's definitely Ctrl+ left click to emulate a right click.

*tries, to make sure*

Yup. All of the other modifiers (Shift, Alt/Option, Apple/Command) do nothing in this context.

Command-left click on a Mac works the same as Ctrl-left click on a PC, in that it allows multiple selection of discontiguous items in a list.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:30, closed)

^ ^
In that case, I may have to re-evaluate my mouse-button key-mappings.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 11:49, closed)

Do I win a prize?
I passed out having a minor fit the other day, and remember having a cool dream for those few seconds. Cannot remember it now, but I know it made no sense even then.

Do I get a gold star or a little pill/screw like Spimf's?
(Neostenine's maker, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:03, closed)

Hello all
Bert is scaring me.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:04, closed)

I presume
That something has happened at some point to cause this, but why exactly is Burt pretending to be MM? And does he not remember what happened last time all the name switching happened?
(PenguinOfDeath wants a holiday on, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:09, closed)

If I could be bothered
I would make a new account under Bert Monkeysex, just to annoy him.

Then I wouldn't let him have his name back until he paid me a thousand goats.

If I could be bothered.

And I don't want anyone getting ideas about this.

Okay?

You all understand, no setting up a new account under Berts old name.

Got it?

And while we're at it, no running for last post.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:12, closed)

PoD
What happens? Al mentioned it up there

He has also photoshopped my profile pic and gazzed it to me.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:13, closed)

He made this


Now I have teh fear.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:15, closed)

Good afternoon folks.
I didn't have any dreams last night as I drank myself into an alcoholic coma. I had a nice dream about b3tans visiting the zoo the night before.

How are things?
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:18, closed)

@MM
that is quite strange behaviour, even by Bert's standards.

I wonder if he's okay?
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:19, closed)

Afternoon wookie
How's tricks?
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:19, closed)

Gah!
I think he must be off his meds again.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:19, closed)

It is odd.
I don't like it.
Hope he's ok...
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:21, closed)

Tricks are fine thanks MM, apart from the tail end of a hangover.
How are you, apart from the disturbing internet cloning?
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:24, closed)

Wookie...
S'up mate?

We should go to the Zoo, b3ta trip!
Alcohol, then zoo.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:24, closed)

Arse
It says the username Bert Monkeysex is already taken.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:24, closed)

@al
I do hope no-one tries to steal his username, that would be most unfortunate really, would it not?

And that photo is slightly worrying. Maybe he hasn't had enough goat recently?
(PenguinOfDeath wants a holiday on, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:24, closed)

Odd, but...
strangely alluring.

*phones the Tate*

Hello? Yes, I have a new discovery for you...

EDIT: *sings* We're going to the Zoo, Zoo, Zoo! You can come too, too, too!
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:25, closed)

'noon all!
how is everyone today?

scenes four, five and six are just about to go up. I'll add them to the original.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:25, closed)

All good, all good.
I have my badges, so y'know.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:25, closed)

Yay HLT!
I do hope you're wearing your most smashing blouse today.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:26, closed)

Afternoon all
Been in a bloody meeting all morning so haven't been able to play.

Is it really a week since the bash? So much has happened since then.

*Nostalges*

*Edit* Hi HLT. Can't wait to see the next installments.
( Davros' Granddad got the girl and killed the baddies, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:27, closed)

Hello HLT! *waves*
@Kaol - Zoo bash yay! I think zoo then booze is a better order though.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:28, closed)

*snogs everyone*
right, the next scenes have been tacked onto the end of the last one.

I'm off to work - see you all in an hour!
*snogs everyone again*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:30, closed)

If Bert's going
then alcohol should not precede the trip. The monkeys will take him as their own.


.....actually, pub first.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:30, closed)

Pub fiiiiiirst!
Then I can stun you all with my amazing knowledge of animals.

*mutters*
Only fuckin' thing my fuckin' degree was any fuckin' use for...
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:32, closed)

Scenes 4, 5 and 6
are bloody fantastic. Especially Scene 5. Can't wait until TRL reads it.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:34, closed)

Butbutbut
the zoo opens before the pub does.

I think we should go to the zoo and then have a picnic in the park with frisbees and climbing falling out of trees and beer and a bucket full of ice.

*may do this sort of thing regularly*
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:35, closed)

Zoo is near Regents Park?
Wine + Cider + Park = Fun
Afterwards go to Zoo.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:37, closed)

Trouble is,
the zoo shuts at half five.

I wonder if they're doing any zoo at night things this year, that might be fun pissed.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:39, closed)

I did one of those
Zoo at night things once.
After huffing a load of ether.
That was... *shrugs*
Special.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:41, closed)

100?
doh
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:41, closed)

100?
Yay, my first century!
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:41, closed)

Well done Al.
*slow claps*
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:44, closed)

*takes a bow*

*runs around*

*licks Kaols ear*

Sorry. I just got a bit over excited there.

The only problem with london zoo is that it is very expensive.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:47, closed)

^^
Is this still going?

I actually had a deluge of work I've just managed to claw my way through.

*Awaits new QOTW*
*Hopes may be able to contribute a tale*
(Boss Keloid Following Hitler with bourbon biscuits, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:47, closed)

@Boss
Yup. It's not really been a week for inspirational and touching stories really.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:49, closed)

It's not cheap,
but you can get 2 for 1 if you go on a train.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:49, closed)

@WGW
true, and you can get herpes from that too.

So double bonus.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:51, closed)

...
Bert is a retard.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:53, closed)

Genius!
MM, take a bow.
( Davros' Granddad got the girl and killed the baddies, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:57, closed)

*chants*
2 for 1! 2 for 1! 2 for 1! 2 for 1!

EDIT: Oh, nice work, MM!
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:58, closed)

*bows*
Thanks you, thank you all.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:58, closed)

Nicely done.
I don't think it would be a good idea to take Bert to the zoo, there's a bit where you're allowed in with the monkeys.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 12:58, closed)

'noon all!
Are we still here, or are we awaiting a new thread?
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:00, closed)

GGGGGGGGAERRRAEGH!
I'm going for lunch now.
Have fun getting first post.
:(
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:04, closed)

@MM
Now, if you were to go here you will see that Mr Monkeysex is very sorry about what he did, and that he didn't mean to scare and upset you.

And I think he might want his username back!
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:04, closed)

I've been gazzing him
and he knows it's a joke. I'm starting to quite like it now anyway.....


He knew what was coming when he started this. He said his doppler effect was better than mine.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:06, closed)

@MM
He said What!

That fucker, well, that's the last time I defend him then.

A better Doppler effect than Madam Malboro indeed.

*wonders what a doppler effect is*

*knows really*
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:09, closed)

*gasp*
The swine!
Have at him, MM. No woman should stand for that.
(wellgroomedwookiee you are our second favourite food, OTHER THAN WOOD, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:09, closed)

Noon Maladicta!
I think we're all just hanging about in here, talking bollocks.

May I say, that's a smashing blouse you have on?

EDIT: Then, MM, the fucker shall RUE THE DAY!

(well, not really...)
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:09, closed)

The doppler effect
is this

Or more simply, the way the sound changes as you drive past something.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:11, closed)

Thanks for your support guys
I knew I could count on you
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:12, closed)

CUNTS
...if I wasn't so busy..!?!

*grumbles*
( Monkeysex got the baddies and killed the girl, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:17, closed)

PONCE!
I called him a ponce, and now I'm calling you once. PONCE!

My wife is having a baby!
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:18, closed)

@al
OMZGOD!

Really? When?
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:20, closed)

REALLY?
CONGRATULAMATIONS!

Verily, you are a fertile man!

*hope I don't get impregnated over the internets*
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:20, closed)

DiT
Yeah, cause then you'd be in all the papers like that other fellow.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:24, closed)

The papers?
Hm. Not sure I'd like that. Before you know it it would be:

"DiT FALLS OUT OF CHINAWHITES!"
"DiT AND DOCHERTY DO SMACK AGAIN!"
"DiT ENTERS REHAB!"
"DiT BACK ON SMACK!"
"DiT IN "I'M ACTUALLY QUITE BORING" SHOCKER!"

Fame. A fickle mistress.
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:26, closed)

So
is Bert back to being Bert again?

And will the real Madam Marlboro please stand up.

It's been a confusing old day.

But I'm happy at getting a part in HLT's play!
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:26, closed)

No I was just .....
errrm, well, oh never mind.

It's just that DiT quoted Withnail and I, so I quoted some back and then, yeah.

I'm not married.

Yet.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:29, closed)

* applauds HLT's story *
Woo and Yay to scenes 4, 5 & 6! Broomsticks FTW.


( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:29, closed)

I'm here
and Bert has almost got his name back
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:29, closed)

@ DiT
How did you know I had a blouse on?
*waggles her hand in front of the webcam she hopes is off*
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:31, closed)

@al
Oh! I get it now!

*de-densifies*

We came on holiday by mistake!

EDIT: I see everything, Maladicta.

Especially that. ;)
( Devil_In_Tights my ring is tight on my finger, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:32, closed)

@ al
Woo! Congraturation!
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:34, closed)

@Maladicta
Maybe DiT was wanting you to say you weren't wearing a blouse. Which opens up a whole new field of innuendo.

@Spakka - you need to post that graphic where spimf can see it!
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:34, closed)

@DiT
what's that she's doing now?

I didn't think nice girls did that sort of thing.

Especially with a gerbil in the room.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:35, closed)

@ DiT
It's free for the first hour, then I charge by the quarter-hour.
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:36, closed)

The gerbil
is currently enjoying a little snooze in his cage after running about on that bloody wheel all night, as well he might!

@ al - I think the person you need to ask about whether I'm a nice girl or not is Mr Maladicta. Or Jamesthegill.
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:38, closed)

@spak
stick it in here
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:41, closed)

@Maladicta
so by my calculations I owe you for, lets see 1 day = 24 hours = 96 quarters and how many days in 1 year and three months?

less that free hour of course.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:44, closed)

*woos to the next bit of the play*
*and Spak's drawing*
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:44, closed)

Madam M
I was almost afraid to click on that link, hopingthinking that it might be NSFW!

But it appears I got the wrong idea. Again.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:44, closed)

I have an internet for fifteen minutes
Yays!
( ancrenne doesn't eat anything that can play video games, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:46, closed)

@K2k6
as if MM would ever post anything unsuitable.

She's a nice girl.

unlike that Maladicta if Mr Maladicta is to be believed. Those stories. Phew! My ears were burning. Filthy, filthy I tell you

*grins*
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:47, closed)

al- do you mean that
or do you just fear for your username?


AAAAAANNNNNNCCCCCCRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNEEEEEEEEE!
*snogs*
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:48, closed)

Darling MM
So nice to know you're pleased to see me!

I've spent the morning playing on swings on the way to work and then sitting outside in the sun sorting and bundling cables.

I so love my life :)


Hoope you're all well?

Eep - only ten minutes of internet left!
( ancrenne doesn't eat anything that can play video games, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:50, closed)

.
@al: Congratulations

@K2k6 & MM: Have done.

@Maladicta: It's not mine. I found it here.

EDIT: Good afternoon ancrenne
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:52, closed)

Why
the sorting of the cables?

EDIT- nice work spakka.
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:52, closed)

No
I didn't mean it at all.

Maladicta is a lovely person and I shall stop being mean. And MM is a purveyor of the finest filth available to humanity.

That is all.

I'm stopping internets for the day as it is too distracting.

See you all later.
( althegeordie Binary Solo! 000000100000011100111111111111111111!, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:53, closed)

I'm back
Wooo!
I have a pocket-ful of 50p's, a stomach full of meat and a happy grin.

EDIT: Ancrenne! Yay! *snogs excitedly*
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:53, closed)

Bye al!
Will follow you shortly
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:54, closed)

Cables
cos my mates business has many and they need them sorted, labelled and stored.

And they'll pay me to do it.

Edit - Kaol...my, my - you ARE pleased to see me!
( ancrenne doesn't eat anything that can play video games, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:54, closed)

Nice one, spakka
And that Coast of Yemen chap's quite smart too. I like it.

Off to do some work for a bit.

See y'all later.
( K2k6 01000010011101010110110100100001, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:55, closed)

@Kaol
Is the happy grin because you don't have pockets full of meat and a stomach full of 50p's?

EDIT: See ya Al.

EDIT2: See ya K2k6.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:55, closed)

ooooooh.
Nice work if you can get it.

Tell me, are you using cable ties or leccy tape.

EDIT bye K2k6
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:55, closed)

Oh GOD....
Cable ties and electrical tape?

And ancrenne?

I.... I have to return some videotapes...
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:57, closed)

Ancrenne
Run. Run for the hills. And don't look back
( Madam Marlboro : bringing sexy back. YEAH., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:58, closed)

Electrical tape in many colours
Some cable ties, not many

a heat gun

and my friend has just liberally applied suncream to my exposed bits.

Y'alright there Kaol? You sound a bit funny..

EDIT 0 Just as things were getting interesting. Being paid by the hour so have to scarper... Back later this eve people.
( ancrenne doesn't eat anything that can play video games, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 13:59, closed)

Surely Kaol
you mean MAKE a videotape?
(Moniker, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:00, closed)

*breathes deeply*
I'm... I'm fine thanks.
Just came over a little dizzy.
( Cawl - King Of Wales, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:01, closed)

Multicoloured electrical tape
Are you sorting it by hue?

Catch ya laters.
( mistaspakkaman - just turn on the tap, and I'll be there., Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:02, closed)

@ al
No offence taken, you're not telling me anything I don't already know ;) I just nipped off to chat to my housemate for a bit!

*has had no sexy tiem for 3 weeks, so is feeling the strain and cursing Mr Maladicta's new job for tiring him out*
( Maladicta click, click, boom, Thu 26 Jun 2008, 14:12, closed)