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This is a question Pet Peeves

What makes you angry? Get it off your chest so we can laugh at your impotent rage.

(, Thu 1 May 2008, 23:12)
Pages: Latest, 44, 43, 42, 41, 40, 39, ... 1

This question is now closed.

You know the sort..
Those people who ware a bluetooth headset WHEN WALKING AROUND!!

You're not driving anymore, you're in a goddamn supermarket! Do you really think that you're THAT important that you'll need both hands while at the bloody shops!!

You're not goddamn Uhura, get over yourself and put the headset away..
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 16:11, 6 replies)
Ooh, and Kuja335, 'Does that hurt!?' as a conversation opener about my ears' stretched piercings (or flesh tunnels if you prefer)
Yeh, I am in constant unerring pain, look at me here, shaking in agony.

*sigh*
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 16:09, 6 replies)
People who believe in horoscopes
You are idiots.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 16:08, 3 replies)
"Is that a real tattoo?!"
NAW YOU FUCKWIT, I JUST SPENT AN HOUR IN SOME PAIN GETTING A STICK ON TATTOO THAT I'M GOING TO APPLY FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!!!

I hate it when people say that to me.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 16:02, 6 replies)
height
"ooooh you're tall"

really love, thanks for pointing it out.
argh!
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 16:02, 6 replies)
Girls!
Don't get me wrong, I love girlies but...

I really hate the way that as soon as the sun comes and the weather gets warmer all the females in my office are allowed to wear the following:

*Flip-flops
*Shorts
*T-Shirts
*Singlets

And the guys in my office have to make do with:

*Suits
*Shirts
*Ties
*Black leather shoes

This is blatant sexism and it peeves me off good and proper.

When did this become the norm!?
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:57, 12 replies)
Is this...
...the most pages for a qotw yet? (other than the sick joke question which doesn't look like it'll ever be beaten)
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:56, 1 reply)
Mostly it's people, including myself....
1) Lazy typers. The shift button is there for a reason. Buggering words up the arse so much they become a mangled shadow of their former self to look "cool" is... not "cool". Not at all.

2) Self declared people. Saying "I'm a writer/poet/artist/musician!" does not make you one. It makes you look vain when in fact all you really do is scribble a few words/lines/notes every so often. And the majority of those are not even good. No effort. To become an artist, you have to make something of yourself. You can not just declare it so, you look like a wanker. I've loved making art my whole life, but I am not an artist. I am an art student and will be until I die.

3) The Rage. This is what I get when I get angry. Blame it on being a Taurus and so a stompy bull seeing red all I like, it still pisses me off. Yes, even more than I already would be if I had The Rage. It takes over me, making me spout a load of bollocks that I wouldn't otherwise say or mean, and makes me look like a horrible, horrible person. I'm not horrible, honestly! It can upset alot of people.

4) Certain words. "Lol" and "ass" and anything with a zed in it are perfect examples. Agh, give me a fork to stab out my eyes!

5) Bad days. Things where everything seems to go wrong. Like the day I got a cold, sold my beloved car and was throwing up with a migraine at the same time. Or today, where wires have been crossed that was neither my or the messenger's fault, a person has pissed me off causing The Rage, and it has upset someone very close to me.

6) People telling me my hair is long. Really.... what?! Oh my, so it is! I never in the whole time it was attached to my head noticed this amazing, wonderous fact! It reaches my knees, so it is long, but they don't need to tell me this. They then go on to spout a varying combination of the same meaningless questions I always get asked. I'm planning to get a t-shirt made with the answer written on it.

7) The "little" things. It seems for everyone it's the little things that make you snap. They build up and up and up causing wild mental anger, that nobody else understands because "och, it was only a little thing." Yes, and another and another and another....

8) Ignorant people who don't try to understand at all. For example, the neds who kill you if you look like a goth, or those who think that people who have or do date over the internet are "poor, sad, pathetic wee people" who "need to get out more".

9) The invisable button on this tiny keyboard. I bought myself a microscopic ASUS EEE a few weeks back and the shift button to the right of the keyboard is so tiny I sometimes miss it. When that happens I somehow press a magic button that deleted everything I've just taken ages typing on the other microscopic keys. I've tried to replicate it, but it's not there. I swear there is some invisable button that only pops out when I'm not paying full attention to where my shift seeking finger is meandering.

10) The Safe Place. This is a vortex that sucks up anything I have sat down in a safe and secure place so I will be able to find it later. So far it has my prescription sunglasses and an abundance of other little things. It had my gloves for a while, but then released the once winter was passed.

I think I'll stop there before I get carried away =p
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:54, 5 replies)
We've had two days of glorious summer weather
And already the nation's obese are racing to publicly expose as much flesh as possible whilst scoffing pasties and ice cream as fast as they can shovel it down themselves.

I do not wish to see fat, sunburnt, tattooed chavs, covered in pastry crumbs and blobs of ice cream, or their godawful chav tattoos, on beautiful sunshiny days.

*retreats to dark cave to sulk with the other bats*
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:50, 22 replies)
Girlfriends parents
Where do i fucking start. At the moment i am living with them while i recover from a ball busting operartion but i shall soon be free from there evil nazi ways. lets just say they are from the old school of parenting and run there house like an uptight lesbian teacher organises shower time after P.E.

Firstly they tell me that i can take whatever i want from the fridge and then have a go at my girlfriend cause i ate her fucking dads spam, fucking spam, (tightfisted cunts wont buy real ham).

So i become cautious about what i eat from there on and double check with said girlfriend about what i can and cant eat. I ask for a frozen pizza and girlfriend says it's ok but when i was cooking it i was getting a looks from her parnets like i was molestion there grandaughter with a wine bottle. hear them muttering something along the lines of "Pure cheek of it" and "taking Liberties".

I assure you dear reader that i am a humble man who does what he is told but the old cunts are pushing me to my empathetic boundaries. Leaving in a few days and i cant wait for them to find all the rank veg i have hidden in the airing cupboard.

Oh and i have found a rather large and disturbing amount of porn on there home computer that is of the very young teen variety. Screenshots have been taken and i can't wait to bring this out in an argument.

Length- with the help of imported canadian pharmacuticals
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:46, 1 reply)
Oh, yes... One other thing.
Politicians who talk about "decent, hard working people".

What the hell do you mean? Were I to find basic tasks a struggle, would that endow me with virtue? Does the fact that, by and large, I'm good at what I do and do it without breaking into a sweat, and that I am often not working hard to achieve impressive things, mean that I am less worthy of attention?

By decent, do you mean prissy little curtain-twitchers? Perish the thought...

... although thought often does perish in your vicinity.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:38, Reply)
women
Soft and aesthetically bumpy as they may be, why can't women learn to speak sentences that actually mean what they say? A man needs a lifetime of practice to translate a woman's words.

"It's hot isn't it?" actually means "I'd like you to buy me an ice cream, but I want you to offer rather than being asked. And get it with your own money."

"Did you enjoy the party yesterday?" really means "I saw you looking at that girl with the long black hair and if you say 'yes' it means you fancied her and that's why you enjoyed the party."

"It's still quite early isn't it?" really means "I want you to offer to take me to a restaurant tonight at your own expense as a gesture of love."

And if a man doesn't get the gist of these Delphic questions at the first try, he's insensitive and doesn't understand women. He should know what she wants before she speaks - the question itself is the last straw.

Nor is a man saved by his own linguistic simplicity. If he says "Are you going to eat that last sausage?" he will be met with the irritated question "WHY?" It's a yes or no question! Do you want the sausage or not? In HER mind, the question implies that she's fat and that she shouldn't eat that sausage because you'll stop loving her when she's fat. It's your fault for putting that sausage on her plate AND for taking it off.

Wish I was gay.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:37, 27 replies)
Non-music
Pubs that have a juke box for you to put £1 in for 3 songs and having the volume at a level that's barely audible to a bat.

Putting on some AC/DC, Iron Maiden, etc and having some chav twat saying, "What's this shit?"
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:35, 1 reply)
Unrelated, but I had to share this.



Coming soon to a chav near you!
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:33, 9 replies)
I wasn't going to post this week...
Partly because my PC was playing up, partly because I've been busier and stressier than I thought possible, and partly because page after page of dribbling rants don't appeal to me. BUT - I've got a few minutes free now, so here's my penn'orth.

Radio 4 presenters and their politician interviewees, sit up. This is for you.

FIRST "Begging the question" (petitio principii) does NOT mean "raising the question". Rather, to beg the question is to commit the fallacy of presupposing in the premises of an argument that which is to be shown in the conclusion.
Allow me to demonstrate. "I think, therefore I am," says Descartes. The argument here would look like this:
P1: I am thinking
P2: Thinking things exist
C: Therefore I exist.
The problem here is that, if the existence of "I" is the conclusion of the argument, it really oughtn't to be in the major premise. The argument is, therefore, invalid; and the reason it is invalid is that it begs the question. "Begging the question", in other words, doesn't really have a great deal to do with asking anything.

(For the nonce, what Descartes should have said is:
P1: There is thinking going on
P2: Thinking things exist
C: Therefore I exist...
... except that he shouldn't. This argument is invalid because now the problem is that the "I" has come from nowhere. The point is that "I think, therefore I am" is a crock whichever way you look at it.)

SECOND "To refute" does not mean the same as "to reject" or "to rebut". To refute a statement is to demonstrate its falsity, such that no rational person could believe it; it does not simply mean to deny that claim or to make a counterclaim.

THIRD People do not have valid points of view or opinions. Validity is a property of arguments, and depends on obeying certain rules of inference or deduction. Opinions are neither valid nor invalid - although often they're silly (but that's a different matter).

I think that's it for now. I shall go away again until the new question tomorrow. Please, god, let it be humourous...
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:32, 21 replies)
Lots of things make me extremely angry, Here's a few :
1) I work from home. That means, (insert husband's relatives and women who don't work and have children) that you can't just "drop in" for a chat, because I can't just "drop everything I'm doing at work" just for you.

2) I have and wear a Golliwog. Ok it's a brooch, but don't call it a brooch, its a fucking Golliwog. And it's playing a saxophone (not many people see that, they just see the black face), and it was a gift from a friend who bought it for me on Ebay.

3) It didn't take me very long to work out that you have to be black, gay and disabled to get a job in the County Councils.

4) Oil companies. The cost of fuel will put me out of business.

5) Women who talk complete shite about celebreties (I don't know any of them), children, going shopping, christmas and any other event that involves spending money.

6) People who believe everything they see and hear on TV and in read in the newspapers.

And finally

7) People who buy yachts or boats with no seafaring experience. You are a bunch of complete wankers, and look it as well.

I can probably think of many more, its the tip of the iceberg.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:28, 1 reply)
New Age Cool/Gap Year Twats
Over the last few years I have become a little more angrier with certain types of people but I have tried to rectify this problem by being less judgemental and playing the ignorance card. But recently a unique and special breed of ultra cunt has impregnated themselves into are great society with an ease that frustrates me.

What I like to call 'new age cool', defines someone who thinks that they are so uber cunting cool that they think being different and bit 'mad' is a way of life, while also the way they talk would make the Dali llama take a pick axe to there heads. The men are floppy haired, baggy trousered, bona fide fairies with panache for sausage through the back door (crafty butchers). The women all seem to be cloned from the same inbred gene pool to. Same fucking hair, same shitting clothes, same twatting interests, same completely bollocks and very unfunny humour (ironic humour is an art form that you cunts have no ability to pull off) and last but not least same arse knobbing taste in shite music. I bet you tried to get on that shite channel four programme 'shipwrecked' too. Every time I see this programme I pray for a tsunami of biblical proportions. I'll just keep praying that the lord god almighty dishes out his holy wrath on you with one swift judgement and then maybe we can all evolve peacefully without some twats trying to put themselves on a higher social plain.

Just in case god doesn't catch up with you first, will the following people please join hands in a mass suicide pact by throwing yourselves off beachy head:

Men: floppy haired Gap year twats at skiing resorts in the Swiss Alps offering free snowboarding lessons for hot cock action. You then come back to Blighty harping on about how cultured you are. But you forget to mention that daddy paid for your whole trip round the world and the mere suggestion that you understand the poverty and economic situation in Burma instantly makes you a middle class ponce with so much hypocrisy in your veins that you make Stalin look like a misunderstood philanthropist.

Women: Toni and gay shit hair women who either wear polka dot dresses (you look like a shit 1950's ropey old washer women, it's not fucking ironic either it's just plain shit!) or black skinny jeans with a ramones T-shirt(ever heard any of there music?...thought not). Your unjustified love for the mighty boosh is not because it's funny but because you want to fit in with the rest of your polka dot sheep when you sit around in some wank uber trendy bar talking abount Noel Fieldings hair. Oh and the constant quoting of the mighty boosh does not put you in the realms of stand up comedy genius, you look like a pranny. And you know where you can shove your new rave music!

Oh that felt good. your mum said the same about my length
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:25, 1 reply)
Militant Non-Smokers
You force smokers outside pubs.

Then, at the first sign of sunshine, you take up all the tables in beer garden!

I felt like going up and saying "Excuse me, this is the smoking area"
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:24, 10 replies)
Keep the list down..
Long time lurker, first time poster. Here goes..

1. People who say "Yes well you're getting old now!" Of course this is down to opinion, but if I'm getting old what the fuck is different with them? I'm sure they haven't remained the same age since we last met.

2. Absolutes regarding modern music annoys me no end. The Beatles are the finest example in that many people say they are the best band and allow little comeback. Clearly they made history etc but it's not like pop music had been plodding along for 50 years before they popped up. Give me the Who anyday.

3. Call centres annoy me generally, which I concede is nothing new in this question. But why must they put you on hold for no good reason just because they're about to have a ruddy good laugh with their mates? At least spout some cock and bull stories you ignorant tossers. Also what's the need of putting a password on the account? I won't ever remember it and I can't write it down because people rake through paper bins I hear.

That is all for now, I'll compose myself then write more
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:22, 1 reply)
Found the right place for this finally.
The bastards... Everywhere I go I see Lego sets with "special shapes" and Specificly shaped parts.... model "Technic Lego" cars which have pre-formed suspension wishbones and lumps of engine that can ONLY be a lump of engine... It's no longer adaptive, it's merely a 3D jigsaw puzzle with bumps on it!!!
THEY HAVE DESTROYED LEGO.
I remember having the ability to make ANYTHING from a kit of Lego. Nowadays there is one thing, and one thing only.... Gone is the "make anything out of standard parts" philosophy.... Gone is the need for creativity and imaginativeness. A set of shelves from Ikea is a more adaptive building set.
MY brother and I used to spend AGES making stuff that looked cool.... and now? Castles with frikking BROWN parts in them.... mean...REALLY !!! BROWN!!!! the horror. Colours for LEGO are Red, Yellow, Blue, Black, and Grey.... White at a SERIOUS stretch can be allowed, and Green if you count the big flat sheets... But BROWN???? NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!

Technic Motor-set (with two gearboxes)... I salute you.
Servo-motor system with logic gates? GO TO HELL.
Bits or rubber tubing to represent hoses: awesome.
Pre-moulded convoluted exhaust manifold malarky.... (just to make it look REAL) feck RIGHT off. You're taking the PISS!!!

It's like giving Care-Bears rocket packs,
It's like giving "my little pony" a stallion's meat-truncheon.
It's like giving Richard O'Brien a head of hair
It's like making Dinky toys out of PLASTIC.
It's like making John Major the presenter of 'Eurotrash'
It's as socially acceptable as taking a dump at you're Gran's house, infront of your family, RIGHT on the Turkey.
You just don't DO IT!!!

*sigh*
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:22, 8 replies)
Ill-dressed students
It's been a while since i last posted but i am bringing myself out of retirement while b3ta is not blocked at work. I remember back in the day when i was a student that wearing a scarf with a t-shirt, flip flops and shorts was treated with the contempt it deserved. You were looked upon as a dumb twat who enjoyed looking like a surf bum but in -20oC. But there has been a recent upturn in the amount of prannys walking around in shorts, t-shirts and what looks like yasser arafats tea towel around there necks. I'm not exactly sure if they look like badly dreesed suicide bomers or just plain cunts.

I have to work for these absolute cunts everyday and it's getting to the point where i might actually kill the next cunt dressed like this when the weather is shit. So dickheads remember this, it's not the fucking shara desert, your a 'bo-ho' type of cunt who hangs around brighton beach looking at the old grannies baggy minges and then you piss off to some shit gastro pub and order sausage and mash (sausage unt mashette) at an over inflated price and talk about how great the latest shit gig you went to was.

If you have come under any of the above please do me and the rest of the world a favour and kill yourself, please help us rid the world of fevered ego's!

Length-ask your sister
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:21, 1 reply)
People assuming that geeks are male
and any women who chooses to frequent sites where any kind of community has developed, or even just where people good naturedly chat, must be after attention from the 'desperate' men.

NEWSFLASH: Women like the internet too.
I like porn, I like computers, I like spazzing about and finding bizarre things.
I enjoy image manipulation (though I'm too rubbish at it to post the actual results too often) and I love having a site like b3ta to check in on, seeing images others have made, having a giggle, and yes- sorry, chatting a bit.

But even if none of that was the case, what part exactly of my having two rather than one X chromosomes means that inherent in my nature must be the need to waste my time and yours gathering the attentions of 'geeks' who are in reality usually happily settled in a relationship and just here for the giggles, talent and community?

I realise there's a certain irony to the creator of nekkid time celebratory posts being the one ranting about this but seriously- do you people ever stop to look at facts rather than stereotypes occasionally?
It'd be real nice if you'd try it.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:19, 8 replies)
Stairway to hell
Leaving stuff on the stairs, it's dangerous, if you can't see where your feet go you might slip and fall - or even worse, slip and drop your 4 month old son* and go tumbling down the stairs as he flies through the air - which is what I did even after repeatedly pleading with my ex not to leave things on it, she left a magazine on the stairs.

THEY ARE FOR WALKING UP AND DOWN ON, THEY ARE NOT A FUCKING BOOKSHELF!



*I caught him :)
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:11, 3 replies)
A list of my peeves
Kids - I remember when I was their age, I could talk at a volume below a shout and walk without breaking into a sprint. I could also sleep at 6am, so why can't they?

Bad drivers - people who don't put their seatbelt/driving glasses on until they're halfway down the road. This usually results in the car veering off into oncoming traffic. People not indicating. All you need to do is lift a finger, it's not difficult. The boy racers who think they're all Fast N' Furious at the lights. You're in a massive V6/Skyline/almost any other car, I'm in a Getz. It'd be like beating up midgets, fun to do but where's the challenge? "Baby/Princess on Board" signs. Do these people really think people drive around all the time smashing into eachother and then see their "Baby on board" sign and think, "Best not, they're with child". And I'm pretty sure if there was a "Princess on board", she'd be the one in the back of the car, not the fat bird driving it and she'd have a police escort and all that shite. People who don't thank me when the road's too narrow for two cars to pass eachother. You rude fucks.

Shit music - I write songs and actually try to write lyrics that mean something. But Paris Hilton released an album. As did Eskimo Joe, Gyroscope and Shannon Noll. My god.

Consumers - I'm a barman who's philosophy is, I get paid exactly the same amount of money regardless of whether or not my bar was full of customers.

The ignorant American - The kind of person who lives in the Bible Belt and would reply to the statement, "Americans only know how to solve problems with violence" with "I'll fucking kill you man, America's the greatest country on Earth and we'll bomb the fuck out of your shitty little country. Fuck You! lol". This is pretty much universal, and I know that there are Americans who have an education. My heart goes out to you for having to put up with these people on a daily basis.

Boring pets - you were bought to entertain me dog, not to sleep all day and ignore me.

Shit TV - Big Brother. Impossible to escape because it's on ALL THE FUCKING TIME. And when it finishes, they show all the extra bits that you didn't see whilst it was on. Oh joy.

Shit Sports - AFL? What a pitiful excuse for a sport. You get a point if you miss. If you miss a 5 metre wide and infinitely rising column. You get a free kick if you catch a ball passed to you from further away than 10 or 15 metres. And you look gay as in a vest and super short shorts.
Thank god for 20-20. Now when the cricket's on, at least it's not for an entire summer. Just a couple of hours. Welcome to modern day sport.

Sorry for the length, but it feels good to rant
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:11, 8 replies)
Farting
What really pisses me off is when I'm busy working, no one will come over to my desk all day to speak to me, until I let out a sly fart that turns into a mushroom cloud of death.

And invariably, the person that comes to see me will be the hottest girl in the company, who then desperately tries to vacate the area as her eyebrows fall off.

Doesn't matter though, I've already boinked her.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:10, 2 replies)
Eating loudly on public transport
There's not many more things that wind me up like that.

Slowly munching on loud food like crisps or peanuts; especially on trains where you're wedged in for an hour or so. The icing on the cake is when they lick all ten fingers twice afterwards, and possibly accompanied by the odd burp now and then.

Oh, and eating with your mouth open. FFS.

My antidote is to drop greasy farts silently to put them off their food.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:10, Reply)
ice skating
i work at an ice rink as a steward/skate hire and many things the general public do really piss me off.

grown adults not knowing their own shoe size

laughing when they forget to hand me their shoes

taking one look at the skates and asking for a different size without trying them on

complaining that they dont look nice

not tying their laces and then wandering why they keep falling over

people who think they can skate when they clearly cant

people who skate fast but cant stop

people who continue to brek rules after i have told them to stop doing something

small children getting in the way and skating the wrong way

parents of said small children complaining that the good skaters are going to fast and scaring/knockin people over

people who deliberatley put holes in the ice which i then have to fill in

chavs who think they are hard when they are about 5 feet tall

chavs turning up drunk expecting to be allowed on the ice

apart from all these i actually like my job
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:09, 2 replies)
Bank charges.
How does it cost 30 odd quid if I'm overdrawn for a day, for a few quid?
TF it's finally going through the courts.
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:08, Reply)
An open letter to the world on behalf of BMW drivers everywhere
Dear everyone,

Sorry. Just, sorry.

I realise that my brother Bavarian chariot riders can, on occasion, cause some discord on the highway, and I would like to apologise. I read the board this week, and I've never felt so hated. It seems that we're taking more flak that traffic wardens, chavs with R&B spewing phones, and many other sources of your vitriol.

Might I just say that in my defense, I make every attempt not to:

- tailgate;
- drive too aggressively;
- keep my foglights on;
- talk on the phone (even with a bluetooth headset);
- talk on the phone (ESPECIALLY with a bluetooth headset);
- Crowd cyclists (I'm one of you too when I can)

Also, I observe what's going on around me, and let people out at junctions and in where traffic merges. Please afford me the same courtesy on occasion?

Please understand that there's a good chance that quite a few BMW drivers ARE reasonably good drivers. Probably 80% are company cars, and might do 30,000 miles a year or more. That's a lot of driving, and you would hope that the experience would pay off. There's no doubt that there's a lot of badge snobbery involved in the choice of car - many people would probably be better off with a Mondeo or something - but some of us chose the car because it felt solid and had the best engine.

Yes, we might be in a hurry a lot of the time, Unfortunately that's often not our choice - sales targets, traffic problems, lingering goodbyes to our loved ones in the morning... All of these add up to a stressful life on the road.

Now, bastard Audi drivers on the other hand...

Yours,

Fireflier
320d SE (in Metallic Grey which looks purple in the right light)
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 15:05, 2 replies)
Dishwashers
Or not using them. People at work persist in leaving their finished cups on the draining board next to the sink (or in the sink) which is RIGHT ON TOP OF THE FUCKING DISHWASHER. Especially annoying are those that first fill their cups with water and claim they are "being helpful" NO YOU'RE FUCKING NOT! YOU'RE MAKING MORE WORK! If you want't to be helpful, put your cup IN the frakking dishwasher!

And breathe...
(, Wed 7 May 2008, 14:51, 1 reply)

This question is now closed.

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