Apparently I have a sauce.
During a particularly desperate, poor and depressing part of my life I did something that still makes me feel ill now.

Whilst wasting what money I did have in the pub a friend bet me/dared me to eat a whole basket of condiment sachets (I was going through a phase of putting silly amounts of them on chips. A pathetic replacement for nutrients.)

He said he would give me £50 if I got through the whole lot. The problem was there was no way to 'dilute' them, no chips, no bap etc.. To earn my £50 I had to eat them one after another, no breaks, no water. We stole the basket and retired to my hovel.

They were all the ones I hate; brown, horseradish, tartar, salad cream.

I managed to get through 28 when the urge to puke took over.

I ran to the bathroom, dived towards the toilet and proceeded to bring all 28 back up.

My friend stood at the door cackling hysterically, I screamed at him to fetch water, he responded by thrusting £50 into my hand. At this point a glass of water was worth the £50. I loudly slurred at him to get "FUCKING WATER" throwing the money back.

He eventually got some for me, but let me keep the £50 even though I'd left 6 sachets as apparently: "The sight of you puking multicoloured streams in pretty much the reverse order to how they went in was worth £50 of his money any day"

Cunt.
(Drugs ARE the answer., Wed 7 Nov 2007, 22:30, Reply)