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This is a question Summer Holidays

'We're all going on a summer holiday, and if you want to go yo Sven' rapped hip hop heavyweight MC Miker G - and it's as true today as it was way back in 1986. Holidays are a time for us to relax, unwind...and disgrace ourselves and our nations. Tell us about your best and worst holiday experiences. Again.

(, Fri 24 Jul 2015, 10:26)
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In 1998 a Peshawar taxi driver apparently confused the "smugglers' bazaar" market described in the Lonely Planet handbook with the real smugglers' bazaar through the Khyber Pass in Afghanistan
As a result me and three friends found ourselves at an outdoors arms and drugs market, (after passing two signs that said in big English letters "NO FOREIGNERS BEYOND THIS POINT") where guys in headdresses bought and sold AKs, pistols, heroin and hash in quantities I've never seen before or since. To add a certain frisson to the atmosphere, they would test their new purchases by exuberantly firing them into the air. After politely explaining to the men who approached us that we really weren't interested in buying guns, drugs or women, we managed to find a bus going back to Peshawar but it was boarded by police at the border, we were arrested at gunpoint and put in the cells. Four bowel-clenching hours later, we got to talk to the officer in charge who let us go with the advice: "Taxi drivers are scoundrels!"

TL:DR; Went to Afghanistan by mistake, got arrested, talked our way out of it
(, Mon 27 Jul 2015, 21:19, closed)

blimey
(, Mon 27 Jul 2015, 22:17, closed)
Two not-shit posts in a week?
Will wonders never cease?

That's quite a story
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 7:44, closed)
he might go for the long standing record of 2.45 enjoyable stories.

(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 8:15, closed)
No mention of sci-fi characters at all.
I think he's been hacked.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 9:18, closed)
I could insult your lineage, if you like?
Restore balance to the force, or summat.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 9:25, closed)
That would be great, thanks man

(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 9:41, closed)
Ha ha, you're daughter looks like she has an extra chromosome,
and your birth certificate lists both parents as "Unknown".
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 9:44, closed)
Ahhh, that's better!
Now tell me I'm upset.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 9:46, closed)
You're upset, Richard.
Upset at words on the internet. You big bloo-bloo spaz, you.

I added some extra casual disablism, to show that I care.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 10:11, closed)
...and the natural balance of the universe has been restored.

(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 10:40, closed)
Is your account being hijacked by 8yo jihadis?

(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 12:34, closed)
I preferred the original version of this where you took a tourist hippy bus half way up, never got within ten miles of the border, and got warned by a perfectly friendly Pakistani police officer who didn't even hint at arresting you.
Have you retired that version of the anecdote?
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 19:15, closed)
That was the first time.
This is the cover story for arranging a massive drugs for arms shipment.
(, Tue 28 Jul 2015, 20:17, closed)
Ooh, have you got a link to that version?

(, Wed 29 Jul 2015, 16:38, closed)
Why? It was like a tedious gap yah tale. I'm glad you've livened it up with some lies.
Bit rude to recast your parents as 'friends' though given that they paid for the trip.
(, Wed 29 Jul 2015, 18:18, closed)
Never took a "gap yah", sorry
Sounds like you're projecting again
(, Thu 30 Jul 2015, 8:21, closed)
nobody said you did, pet
for a start people don't take their parents and they usually go to university afterwards
(, Thu 30 Jul 2015, 17:48, closed)
Yes, you did, you said it was a "tedious gap yah tale".
From whence would a "gap yah tale" originate if not from a "gap yah"?
(, Fri 31 Jul 2015, 10:20, closed)
You don't need "from" with "whence", pet.
You'd know that if you'd gone to university.
(, Fri 31 Jul 2015, 12:32, closed)
No-one cares, chum.
You'd know that if you'd left university.
(, Fri 31 Jul 2015, 14:43, closed)
Did your parents give you any pocket money with which to purchase souvenirs?
it's fun to haggle with the locals when you're on family trips
(, Fri 31 Jul 2015, 1:05, closed)
He bartered with duplicate action figures that his stupid grandma bought him for Christmas even though he gave her a meticulous list

(, Fri 31 Jul 2015, 12:33, closed)

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