Phone Troll
I always take unsolicited telephone sales calls. I am always polite, express interest in the products or services being sold and generally act like a lovely customer. Sadly, I am quite hard of hearing, have a very poor memory, suffer from congenital stupidity and did I mention not having a good memory? Due to these health issues, it will often take many, many, many repeated attempts before I understand even simple concepts. Sometimes, to the general embarrassment of all concerned, I will need the same sentence to be repeated ten or more times before it sinks into my thick skull. When we ultimately, normally after more than 30-minutes later, get to the point were I have to hand over my bank details, to secure whatever great service is being offered, I generally get very confused about my bank provider. It's not been unknown for me to confuse the barcode on a can of coke for my account number. One nice gentleman was VERY frustrated at my 28-digit account number. He made me get my cheque book, explained where to get the account number from, and was quite upset that it had the same 28-digit number I'd already given him. I did explain, patiently, that it was a very BIG chequebook...

This is why I'm signed up to the Telephone Preference Service. It's not to protect ME and to save ME any wasted time. No, no, no. I have altruistically signed up to TPS to protect the poor telesales industry from having to deal with my fuckpiggery. If they opt to ignore TPS and illegally call me anyway ... well, it's hardly my fault is it?
( Linbox has a serious dunk habit, Thu 19 May 2011, 11:57, 1 reply)

I used to work in telesales
so strictly speaking I should be angry at you teasing poor starving students doing a shitty job for no money. But repeatedly trying give a 28 digit account number is just too funny!
(Robin of the Hood isn't into the whole brevity thing, Thu 19 May 2011, 23:24, closed)