One of the joys* of being unemployed...
...is, of course, dealing with the jobcentre.

Couple of stories from this, my second period of being full time dole scum:

-Lost forms. Due to them not actually processing some forms until three days before they have to, when I moved from contribution based JSA to income based JSA, they lost my form. And gave me two days benefits instead of three. And they might have needed me to go into the jobcentre to fill out another one. The jobcentre in question is in Middlesbrough. At the time, I was in Aberdeen. (In the interest of fairness, i have to point out that they didn't actually know that I wasn't in Boro as I had no signing over the festive period and I couldn't be bothered filling out the necessary forms.)

-Lost phone calls. At my 12 month review I was given an option (after being informed of something I had noevery bit of knowledge about, that being the fact I would have more money working than signing on) of either going to the jobcentre every week or getting a call from them the weeks I don't sign on. After taking the obvious option, I wait for the first call, which never arrives. When I go in to tell them about this (giving me coverage if they claim they did call and therefore I'm losing my benefits) I'm informed that they didn't put me on the right system for the calls. I'm supposed to get a call every fortnight for 2 months. I get none.

-And sheer dumbassery. At my 18 month review, I'm told that I'm being sent to an employment zone as I'm still out of work. And that my appointment is at 9:30. The day after my birthday. Frak. So, instead of celebrating turning 21 (yet again) I talk to the missus online (she's in the States), get my pic taken with the FA cup, go to a free screening if Frost/Nixon, a couple of quiet drinks with a friend and then home with a parmo. Go to the place the next day only to discover...





My appointment isn't actually till 3pm.

Is it any wonder I harbour dreams of buying the building where the useless idiots are based and pressing the button to demolish personally?

(Possibly to come, my tales from the first time I signed on.)

*This word may possibly have been used in a sarcastic sense.
(williamthebloody, Sat 4 Apr 2009, 4:59, 2 replies)

Currently
I'm signing at the wonderful corporation road. Tell me when you are pressing the button. I live close enough to hear it. but would appreciate seeing it fall in all its glorius rubbleness.
(Pill Popper Thank you Sasha Shulgin, Sat 4 Apr 2009, 12:32, closed)

Don't worry
I'm planning to put up a grandstand and sell tickets. I'll make sure you get a front row seat.
(williamthebloody, Sat 4 Apr 2009, 17:17, closed)