What a lovely lamp!
In my first year as a teacher I begrudgingly went in to school on a Saturday to participate in the school fete. Poverty-stricken as I was, I was made to feel obliged to join in by purchasing a fistful of raffle tickets. Inevitably I won a prize. It was a mind-numbingly hideous table lamp, obviously hand made by a tasteless moron who had simply pushed a few plastic flowers into an empty wine bottle and stuck a light fitting and grotesque plastic lampshade on the top.

I turned to one of the oldest teachers, Mr Kramer, and said "Trust me to win the ugliest and most useless prize of the lot!"

"Mmm" he said, "My wife made it shortly before she died of cancer."
(fergus the bogeyman Beware of geeks bearing gifs!, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:17, 8 replies)

Cancer is sometimes the good guy.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:26, closed)

Woooo hoooo
Limited edition!
( The only Dave is pushing things forward, Mon 2 May 2011, 20:02, closed)

The curse of the cancerous lamp

( Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Mon 2 May 2011, 21:33, closed)

"Are you sure it wasn't
shame that killed her?"
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 2 May 2011, 21:42, closed)

Which automatically makes it some kind of work of art.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 2 May 2011, 22:25, closed)

He couldn't have been very sentimental.
After all, he put the lamp in a raffle.
(uncle_bud is not the jelly roll king., Mon 2 May 2011, 22:39, closed)

To which you retorted
a massive brain tumour?
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Tue 3 May 2011, 13:18, closed)

That was funny until I saw it written down.
humour is harder than it looks. I guess Arnold Schwarzenegger deserved all that money for Kindergarten Cop... that was a comedy, wasn't it?
( Sextant goes to him is emotionally erect, on this day, Tue 3 May 2011, 13:19, closed)