How to win at life.
Society and built in desires to reproduce, give us all on the same "Things to do before we die" list.
We are all like pre-programmed robots, to go out there, do well at school. Get a decent job, fall in love, get married, buy a house, and have kids.
I look at people who have 'achieved' this, they are all smug and boasting, driving around in their Honda Accords and parking it on the driveway of a house they own. When speaking to them, its never "I" this, or "I" that. Its always "We". They are no longer a single entity. They no longer hang around with single people. Its always couples, or friends with like minded families. Life is no longer about them as an individual, its about their kids.

Friday nights involve watching X Factor with a chinese take-away - if the kids have been good.
Sunday might involve a kick around on the park with Mr and Mrs Jones and kids.
The rest of the week is go to work, come home, go to work, come home again.

These people are so in denial, they are so happy in their own little world and think they have won at life.

Reality check - they havnt. Infact, they lose. The reason why they dont hang around with single, unsettled people, is because they realised that with their mortgage, responsibilites, kids, and career. They have effectivly just superglued themselves to the ground. A ground that will just eventually lead them to old age, retirement homes and death. Whats worse, is that because their life is mapped out they can see it coming. There is no fog, mist, blocks or any unknown obscuring their view of the end. They are fastened in tight, and there is no getting out of it. They are jealous of the free ranger, who can go out when and where they want. They wish they had that again.

Winning at life is going against the grain, achieving something which others dont. You win if you achieve something you didnt think you was capable of doing. For example, the guy who swam the channel with no arms or legs: Winner. Mr and Mrs Jones next door with their HD TV and shiney BMW on the drive: Failure. What life experiences have these people got to talk about? "Ooh yes its got Satellite Navigation built into the console"

I feel sorry for those that end up married with kids in their 20s, because they really havnt got anything to say. They are boring people. So what I'm saying is. Just get out there and do the things you want to do before you die. Do it now. Because once youre laying out that white picket fence, You're already dead.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:34, 89 replies)

They're not failures
they've chosen what makes them happy. Why is their happiness any less valid than yours, or the chap who swam the channel? It might not be what makes you or me happy, but the life you've described sounds like what most people want- good friends, neighbours, a family around them when they grow old, a partner they can trust.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:38, closed)

I think what he's trying to say is that in a number of cases, the people concerned didn't so much "choose" the course of their lives as drift into it without thinking.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:36, closed)

You seem to have summed it all up very well.
The rest of the replies remind me of this:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcSMaNlcDPs - specifically from 38 seconds!

Oooo handbags!!!!

Pfft.
( camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 8:51, closed)

I think a lot of people
drift into an unfulfilled life. I don't think their car or lifestyle dictates which category they slot into
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 11:06, closed)

How can their lives have been a waste..
... When they have kids.
When they die, part of them will live on through those kids, and through their kids and on and on. Not just their DNA, but also their teachings and their way of life.
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:43, closed)

well quoted :)
Every coin has two sides.. I always look at both :D
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:50, closed)

erm sort of a good point but
if you have done very little with your life, then you are just passing on your limited experiences and you also pass on the 'normal' life goals. By living a 'normal' life, you create the same carbon copy of your life for your kids.

By living a life that is not pre-destined (marriage,kids, house,job), you are likely to experience more - emotionally, culturally, geographically and so on.

By taking the road less travelled, your experiences broaden and you start to question the 'norm'. People have always had rituals such as weddings, but in the old days, they also had to live on their wits to survive. Now it's all about achieving those ritual goals and gaining possessions but without substance, community or adventure.

I bought my first house on my own, I later had a son who wasn't planned, I've been freelance for 20 years (ie never had a 'job') and I've never been married. I've travelled the world and so has my son. I hope that my experiences of life will show my son that the 'norm' is not the only way and that he won't feel pressure to join the 'normal' bus if he doesn't want to.
( camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:44, closed)

I was quoting his own post from a few days ago
www.b3ta.com/questions/wishlist/post916609
I don't agree with his post, far too generalising in their world they are happy so who's to judge. You have a better point which agree with, you can have it all. What you put in to your life you tend to get back in theirs.
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 16:31, closed)

Happiness is...
Easier to dismiss than to describe.
(chuckle_h0und You furnish the pictures, I'll furnish the war, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:52, closed)

i was listening to inspirational music in my earphones as reading that
and so i found it extra inspiring. I agree with you entirely.
Ofcourse, its probably abit much to say that they are in denial. they may be, but i know its also true that when you have a kid priorities change. all other things can seem slighlty insignificant in comparison.
(augsav forgot about B3ta, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:54, closed)

Hahahahahaha!
I point at you with my fingers Mr.Miggyman.

I who have limped through this life with a spanner in one hand and walking stick in the other. Who have built tiny creatures out of thrown away trash to skitter around my kitchen at night and be pounced upon by pussycats who like also to sleep on my head.

I hear what you say, and I understand it, in places I even agree. To let your life drip away piece at a time in order to conform to someone else's idea of success or failure means you lose no matter how tightly you cling to that conformity.

But to declare your own win conditions, yae even though that might include kids, to make that decision an bounce into it with joy in your heart and every ounce of energy you can muster.
That is victory.
( DukeEuphoria Comes highly reccomended, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 10:55, closed)

Guess what?
You're going to die too!

And even if you manage to remove your arms and legs and swim the channel, someone else did it first, so it's not even original! Now what are you going to do?
(sabre-tooth monkey, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:01, closed)

You fail to distinguish between
The ones who "end up married with kids in their 20s", and those who did all the stuff they wanted to do and THEN got married and had kids. I became a father at 39, so I'm in a very different place than the one you describe.

Oh, and by the way, having kids is WAY scarier and more of a white-knuckle adventure than most of the things on the "Bucket Lists" I've seen here this week...
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:08, closed)

Your reply was much more articulate than mine.

(sabre-tooth monkey, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:09, closed)

indeed
way scarier...
(prostheses, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:35, closed)

yep
Agrees
(mon bison powered by magnets, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 14:13, closed)

You are like soooooo extreme
*does 'radical' hand-gesture*
( The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:30, closed)

:)
Nothing like a monday morning debate :)
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:38, closed)

ha ha :D
It's hardly a debate though, is it fella?

I've heard about 'broad generalisiations', but you're painting with a yard brush there.

Do you really think life is that straightforward, cut & dried? Really?

Do you REALLY think people who have kids mid 20's are boring?

To be fair I can't help but read your post in the voice of a Rage against the Machine T shirt wearing 17 year old, with a LOT to learn in front of him/her. Life's a fuck load more varied or complicated than the pigeon holes you seem to be slotting everyone into. By all means get out and live it, but you'll be a hell of a lot more interesting person when you drop the sweeping statements.
( The magic of chutney Shakes it like an Instagram filter!, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:46, closed)

Think I meant controversy there
rather than debate.

Life isnt as straightforward and I've been on both sides of the coin, as someone below here points out another thread I posted.
Ive done the adventuring (emmigrated, cycled across the continent, travelled through the US etc.) and ive also done the family home life with a kid (not my kid). So I know the crack more than you think.

Just highlighting the fact that there are so many Married people who say "I wish I had of done this when I still could..." and its great coz it wipes that smug off them that you see with 20 something year olds who get married and have kids too early.

So I'm telling people, to get their arses out and achieve the stuff they put in their lists before its too late.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:13, closed)

Yeah, nothing so fulfilling as the regrets of others. Hello, schadenfreude.

When you were a child, you spoke as a child. Now you are older, you speak as.... a child. A petulant, whiney one to boot, with very little in the way of perspective. What's so great about being baseless, and with no greater purpose than "givin' it large", or whatever crappy phrase da yoof is using these days, on your regular-as-clockwork Friday and Saturday nights of socially-mandated freedom? What's so utterly fantastic about lacking a job, money, a roof, and someone to share the aforementioned with? Are you aspiring to be a latter-day Stig of the Dump?

Still, what can possibly be expected from someone whose very name is taken from the fact that they used to play on an Amiga computer as a child (although, judging by your bizarre idolization of infantilism, I'd suggest 'Duploman' mighht be more apposite). Let it the fuck go - you're getting older. Live with it, or be one of those sad cases that the actual young people point at and mock in their shitty, noisy, neon meat-markets.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 16:18, closed)

wow
miggy got owned
(SkoaL, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:07, closed)

disagree there
Happy Phantom is implying that im saying that not having a job or a roof is actually a good thing. He also presumes that Miggyman is taken from the Amiga. He presumes that what I'm saying is baseless. Basically a hell of a lot of presumption whereas he/she knows nothing about me.
I would have felt owned if I had have read his/her reply thinking "oh crap yeah he/she is right" but in fact I felt like that was a reply to someone else.

I didnt write what I did to touch nerves or create an argument. I wrote it to make people see that there's more to life than just settling down with kids and getting married. I also simply wrote it in a style that would get noticed.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:22, closed)

Here, you fucking spastic - read your very first reply. The stark hypocrisy of you stating that I am making assumptions, given your ridiculous overgeneralisations above, is galling.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:46, closed)

Fucking owned there.
Maybe if you stopped looking down on people for having the very things you want then women might take an interest in you.

Then again, I doubt it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:50, closed)

I dont see the relevence
I didnt deny that my name came from the Amiga.
You obviously have so much time on your hands to be going through all my old QOTW answers.

Why does some random person on the internet saying something mean so much to you?
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 19:52, closed)

Dude, the relevance is that you said that he 'presumed' your name is a reference to the Commodore Amiga.
He was pointing out that you talk shit.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 19:58, closed)

The relevence is that you were suggesting my presumptions were without merit, by dint of being presumptions - I merely pointed out that they are, as it happens, utterly fucking correct. This is completely clear, and no amount of half-arsed back-peddling's going to make you look less of a dick.

No sense in bleating on about why I'm taking the time to reply, either. It was demonstrably your intent to create a little controversy, and you admit that the 'style' (god, I hate to use that word in relation to your bilge, which truly has none) was expressly intended to inflame. Despite your worthy protestation that you didn't write the above to 'touch nerves or create an argument', you've generalised a massive group of people as being in denial, being losers, being jealous of you (pfft), being failures, having achieved nothing, having nothing to say, and being boring. So, congratulations - I answered. Enjoying it thus far? More to the point, why are you troubling yourself to respond to someone with such a laundry-list of hideous personal failings?

Finally, and crucially - why the shuddering fuck would you imagine, for the barest fraction of a second, that I'd ever, even in my darkest, bleakest, most dispair-filled nightmares, accept relationship advice from someone who's simultaneously a whining cuckold and a borderline nonce?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:50, closed)

oh, Christ. i agree with happy phantom.
the internets will now implode.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:27, closed)

oddly enough, I was thinking the same about you earlier. Unsettling, isn't it?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 21:30, closed)

Christ on a bike...
Been dumped recently have we?
(Monkey Tennis isn't Spartacus, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 11:53, closed)

This may explain it
www.b3ta.com/questions/quitters/post164419
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:02, closed)

Wet chinned bag-shanker...
...your reply for the win!
(emadex thinks the world will end on, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:11, closed)

good spot, that man.
guy gets fucked over by girlfriend, loses contact with her baby, decides that anyone who wants to be in a fulfilling relationship and have children is fooling themselves.

oh, projection - what a wonder you are.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:13, closed)

havnt lost contact.
We're still very good friends actually.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:16, closed)

You have no need for enemies, with friends like that.
Well done.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 13:32, closed)

I know why she did it.
At the mere age of 19, she was living the lifestyle of a 30 year old and as such realised, that despite having a kid, nice boyfriend, money, and a settled life.. She had in fact not lived and there was so much she wanted to go out and do and experience that she was no longer capable of.

In essence, she felt trapped in this perfect world that everyone seems to think that they want - as I described in my original post.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:32, closed)

Let me start by saying
X Factor is on a Saturday. If you've got that simple fact wrong, how can anyone trust another word you type?

How is winning going against the grain? Surely, the reason everyone does something, is because it is fun, and rewarding. I like knowing I own my house, and, even though work can be dull, I like getting a salary every month, and doing whatever I want with it. Going against the grain, for the sake of going against the grain, is as conformist as anything else.
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:10, closed)

I got that simple fact wrong...
... Because I am doing far better things on a Friday AND Saturday night than sitting infront of such a dreary staged program designed for the conformists.
Plus I'm not even in the UK.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:15, closed)

blah blah i'm better than you blah blah.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:18, closed)

...In your dreams buddy!
YOU WISH you had an excuse to not stomp around in boring nightclubs doing boring dance moves and being social with people you couldn't care less about..

we've read the post:
www.b3ta.com/questions/quitters/post164419

Here's another link you might benefit from reading..think about it the next time you go looking for a brush wide enough to try and paint everybody with..

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Playing%20the%20world%27s%20saddest%20song%20on%20the%20world%27s%20smallest%20violin

And just for good measure something to cheer you up, as you're clearly still having a rough time..

www.youtube.com/watch?v=jPmfTRwsOys

Now throw your hands in the air, and wave them like you just dont care!

Also cheer the fuck up, ok?!
(wankymcwankwank Eels, tobacconists, hovercraft and bouncy bouncy., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 13:24, closed)

Oh sorry, American Idol, or whatever you watch or don't watch.
Just because someone watches that crap, doesn't make you better than them. Did you know, that, although exceptionally rare, some people have different tastes.

It's a shocker, isn't it? I personally thought all people were exactly the same, and liked the same things as me, but it turns out that that isn't true.

Now I realise why there are different TV channels, and varieties of sports. And I just found out, that I don't have to go to the same holiday destinations as everyone else!
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:09, closed)

Never said that I was any better than the people I described
Merely using X Factor as an example of how boring peoples lives are fulfilled by watching others try and do something great.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:25, closed)

I watch Supernatural on a thursday night
does this mean I want to leave my life behind and go hunt non-existent demons? Nope. People's tv choice is a way to switch off and relax. It's not a subsitution
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:07, closed)

Boring lives?
Like getting excited about 'marrying' someone on IRC boring?

You tedious fuck.

You are comic book guy AICMFP.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:10, closed)

No way! IRC weddings are the universal passport to Cool.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:52, closed)

Pity they aren't a universal passport to real women, otherwise miggyman would be a bit happier.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:58, closed)

Phantom
You obviously love me having spent all day reading through my entire profile and every single QOTW answer I have ever written.
I am obviously very interesting to you. Whereas, I cant even be bothered to click your name to gather stuff I can use against you.

The wedding one? You actually believe that's real? Do you believe everything that people write as QOTW as being the gospel truth? Believe it or not maybe some people make answers up, or over exaggerate their answers. And why? Because this is an entertainment website. I know damn well of b3tas feature of being able to go through everyone's reply history. You think I'm going to be silly enough to have a truthful account of my entire life through QOTW for anyone to read? You think a prospective employer, my parents, my children, would really want to know that I despise managers, or Laugh at people who get hurt, or Laughed when a kid died, and worst of all Once drove a fiat I dont think so! So why would I leave all that on the internet for anyone to see?

I bet you actually believe that my original answer was from the heart and that I whole heartedly believe every single word I put? No, I just put an opinion across the table, because its entertainment. And wow I really kept you busy today didn't I?

Sorry I need to stop feeding the trolls.
Phantom. Stop believing everything you read online, turn off your computer and go and see the real world.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:04, closed)

Oh, dear. Can somebody call the WHAAAAAAmbulance?

I didn't read through your shitty posting history at all, let alone spend all day doing it; in fact, I was at work, earning money for my family, becuase I am a boring failure who's just oooooh so jealous of your cutting wit and devil-may-care badassery. As it happens, I remembered the Amiga thing because even at the time, it struck me as egregiously sad - and your dodgy sexual proclivities are documented for all time in AB's woeful Fail Archive.

You say this is entertainment.

Are you not entertained?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:17, closed)

I am tremendously entertained by this.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:18, closed)

me too!
Ive not wound a forum up in a long time :) Theyre biting today!
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, closed)

so we can add 'troll' to 'hypocrite' and 'liar'?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, closed)

Don't forget 'borderline nonce' and 'semi-literate'.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:37, closed)

And cliche - don't forget cliche. Item number one - he was trying to elicit this response all along...
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:51, closed)

Yes, OF COURSE he was.
Because he knows I'm nearly sixteen.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 0:05, closed)

Man, I'd love to be able to do that - post something which seemed, on the surface, to be a load of laughable old shite, to draw in the unsuspecting masses, subject myself to their ridicule - and even then, hold my hand, lull them into a false sense of security by portraying myself as an illiterate spazzer with only the slenderest grasp of reason and logic. And then - only then, when it seemed all was lost, BAM! the denoument - it was my dastardly plan all along.

I'd love to be that person. Maybe I could have been, were I not weighted down by the cruel, dual burdens of family and employment.

Fuck. Maybe I am jealous, afterall...
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 1:34, closed)

My goodness Phantom
If you are so busy being employed and having such a nice family, why are you still caring about this post at 1.34am ?
I cant help it that you love me so much, its flattering but I'm sorry I cannot return the feelings back towards you. You're just not my type.
(Miggyman, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 8:13, closed)

Your dastardly plan to look like a dickhead online has been entirely successful
Have a woo!
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 8:26, closed)

Of course I'm not your type - I'm a grownup. Your tastes run more towards the morally-bankrupt.

Nice rejoinder, by the way... if all else fails (and at this stage, I think we can both agree that it has - repeatedly and spectacularly), you can always undermine any argument, however solid it may be, by noting the time at which it was posted. As it happens, I'm not that busy at 1.34am - I have neither to work nor entertain my child, so I'm free to point at you and laugh to my heart's content.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 9:24, closed)

That story isnt true
You keep linking to it, because its morally wrong. But I made the whole thing up for attention. Just like I posted the above for attention.
(Miggyman, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 12:43, closed)

Even if I believed that you'd conveniently made up every tawdry little detail of your posting history - in what possible way do you imagine lying on the internet, garnering the attention of strangers to fill the lonely void in your miserable existence makes you look less of a sad-sack? Is this an important part of your ostensibly magnificent life, of which I'm supposed to be so heart-wrenchingly envious?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 13:07, closed)

Ooh controversial
It's a sweeping generalisation. The point I think you're making is that people get into a routine; Get up, go to work, come home, have their tea, watch telly, go to bed. Maybe throw in a social life and a holiday once or even twice a year.

But such a routine means nothing stands out in your memories, it's the same thing week in week out and it all merges into one beige mass of humdrum nothingness and that is why you think "Christ, what happened to the last 10 years?".
You want to avoid that phenomenon that time speeds up as you get older? Go out and do different new experiences as often as you can. The more variety you add to your life, the more memories you have and the years seem less vacant when you think back.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:41, closed)

Thems a whole lot of stereotypes you've plugged in to that
I think what you actually wanted to say is "I hate people who substitute BMWs and other toys for personality". Yep, there's many of them about.

But as you get older, you'll find you end up with someone. And your good friends from now - the ones you're still in touch with in 10 years - will be with someone too. Hence, get togethers all involve girlsfriends, boyfriends, husbands and wives. They may look boring from the outside but they are rather similar to the pissups that group had when they were all 18.

I hope you stick to your underlying message - do everything you can now before you get that mortgate and kids, because you wont have the chance after that.

But that's not to say when you get to that stage that you'll care. You'll probably feel quite happy and content with it all.

So come back to us in 10 years, when you've got that girlfriend or wife, mortgage, car, and tell us that you have failed, feel dead and might as well kill yourself. I'm looking forward to seeing how your attitude's changed, bit by bit, as you accrue baggage.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:47, closed)

Winning at life?
Life isn't a game with some win or lose outcome. You aren't any better than someone else just because you've climbed Kilimanjaro or whatever. Sure, you may have got an extra experience which brings something to you personally, but you don't stand out from the other 6 billion; you don't get a medal. And just for the record, of course I agree that if you have identified something you want to do before you die, that means to get out and do it now, before it's too late!

For some people having a family and kids and a BMW on the drive is a real achievement. A lady at my work is a former alcoholic in an abusive relationship. She told me once that she used to dream of having a boring life. If winning in life means anything it's about achieving something other than simply existing: about taking yourself and your family to a place other than where you would have ended up anyway. But whether that place is any better than anyone else's situation is a personal judgement: there is no objective 'better' or 'worse'.
(Smale is stuffed, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 12:59, closed)

I see where you're coming from.
I really do. However what you've written (and I'm sorry to say this) seems to be dipped with breath-taking arrogance- that your way of living is the worthy one and nothing else. Some people aren't cut out for the house, car and 2.4 children. But that doesn't mean that way of life is any less fulfilling than yours.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 13:04, closed)

I didnt say I lived any other way.
Nor did I imply that it is unworthy to live like the people I describe. Just that these people may not have made the most of life despite acting like they have.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 14:14, closed)

You might not have said it directly.
But it's pretty heavily implied, even if you didn't mean to.
( jim_bob can herd cats., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:09, closed)

I love my BMW
It makes me happy.
( SigmaX0 Dear Die Hard. You rock!, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 14:12, closed)

I like my HDTV
It entertains me when I'm not skydiving, playing rugby, out with friends or exploring new places.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 14:31, closed)

eh... try posting again when you're out of the 6th form. Your entire supply of 'wisdom' is pretty much a garbled and badly-paraphrased version of the 'Trainspotting' poster:


( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:18, closed)

The OP seems to have hit a nerve
or several, judging from the tone of the responses. Just saying.

Personally, I think he's got a good point, sweeping generalisations aside.
(jennymnemonic, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:34, closed)

Sweeping generalisations aside
There's not much left.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:37, closed)

What I took from it is
we're socially hard-wired to want certain things that it might not behove us to want, and we can have lots more fun and adventures if we don't beat ourselves up for not wanting them/having them.

Certainly I don't envy the small handful of people I know who are in the kind of stultifyingly dull long-term relationships he describes, nor do I ever want to sit through another conversation about the various merits of shelving units(there's only been one, but it was enough.) I think that they do lack imagination, but then that's why they're not people I'd want to spend a massive amount of time with. At the moment I really can't see the attraction of the standard mortgage-marriage-kids triumvirate, but then I'm only 26, I'll probably give up on trying to enjoy life at some point too :)
(jennymnemonic, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:44, closed)

You don't have to be married with kids to be a massive dullard

(Nanny Pat vote for me, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 16:31, closed)

Thanks
Finally someone who understands what I'm saying. Because so many have taken the social hard wired route and as a result feel like they're happy and successful - when challenged by what I wrote, they take it personally and to heart and hit out. Especially those that married and had kids at a young age.
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:27, closed)

i know!!
Cant believe what a nerve I hit :)
Controversy is great isn't it! But I think a lot of have taken it offensive, rather than what I was trying to say. Which is basically get off your arse and do these dreams that you want. Because its much harder to do it once you have commitments of family, children and a mortgage. Also people seem in such a rush these days to get that, because they think its the be all and end all of life.. Once they have it, theyre all smug and acting like theyre better than everyone else! Yet in reality they are wishing, they had of done more beforehand, and now its too late.

The simple fact is, if I had of written it like that, people wouldnt have taken notice and found the post rather boring :)
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 15:45, closed)

What?
No replies from Badger yet?
( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 17:23, closed)

too busy gender identity failing
like the time he fucked a ladyboy in Thailand by 'mistake' probably
www.b3ta.com/questions/wishlist/post918526
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Mon 18 Oct 2010, 18:26, closed)

When I had my children, I was unaware that what I birthed was actually a ticking time bomb, and that as soon as they no longer needed me, I was going to be shuffled into a retirement home until they could legally have me put to sleep.

Why do you seem to think that having children means you can never do anything interesting again? That armless and legless man that swam the English Channel? If you're speaking about Philippe Croizon, he's married with two children.

I confess, I have occasionally been jealous of my single friends. And when I spoke to them about this, they've confessed their jealousy of me. For every time I've wished I could spend an evening in a club listening to an awesome jazz band, they've wished they had someone to curl up on the couch with, and a smiling child in their lap.

Do you know what the advantages are to having children in your early twenties? By the time we're 45 both of our kids will be through with college. That leaves plenty of time to do things we want before we're living it up in the old folks home. We already have plans.

But until then, we're not exactly spending all of our time sitting round the T.V. waiting for the moment we can kick the kids out.
(ladydyani, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 19:39, closed)

Oh that Philippe Croizon
he shouldn't drink you know, he is always leggless but, even so, he is pretty armless.

Where is my hat?
(bad_advice QOTW survivor from the first trollocost!, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 6:16, closed)

stop picking on the fucking Joneses, what did we ever do?
(jetgirl, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 20:46, closed)

You had to be better than everyone else!
With your super 3D HD Sky+. Your Honda Accords. Your conservatory, Your apple tree in the garden etc

You know how it is :)
The Jones' are posh people! :D
(Miggyman, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, closed)

Hahahahahahaha!!!
Silly person or troll? Drunk or sober I still can't decide.
Both apply methinks.
( Blind Meach Cautiously optimistic, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 12:26, closed)

A troll is uninstering, and so is someone whos silly.
Because you can't decide. That means I'm interesting.
(Miggyman, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 12:45, closed)

My turn! My turn!
I have taken heroin, crystal meth, morning glory and and weed.
I have engaged in sexual and religious tourism. I have seen the sun come up over the Eiger, and flown over Etna. I have seen a human head come off. I have broken both my legs, my left index finger and blocked the toilets in the Dorchester. I have had a gun pointed at my head.

These days, I live in a medium sized house, with a medium sized car, with a woman I've been married to for 21 years. Our child is academically mediocre, and rather fat. Most of my friends' conversations revolve round their ailments. My job involves driving the same route every day.

It looks boring. It's great. No more screaming in terror, no more guilt, no more waiting for the tests to come back negative.

The thing I'd like to do before I die? Lie between clean sheets, and gently drift away to the sound of my loved ones' voices.
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 12:30, closed)

I think theres a difference
This is about things to do before you die. Rather than just life experiences. Things that people want to do is based on good things and achievements. Witnessing someone losing their head, or going out of it on crystal meth or damaging yourself isnt something people want to do before they die.

This is post is about those that got themselves all loved up, to the point where they can no longer do the things that they want to do before they die, because of their commitments to family. At the time they thought it was the best thing on earth, but having regrets later in life about not seing the sun come up of the Eiger is the issue.

So many people have jumped down my throat on this, but its quite obvious that people from /talk have been making themselves over to QOTW.
(Miggyman, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 12:47, closed)

Morning glory?
I assume you mean the flower seeds.
Don't know anyone who's tried that. What was it like?
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Tue 19 Oct 2010, 13:21, closed)

Not much fun
Violent stomach cramps, visual distortions, then the Virgin Mary appeared and looked at me with pity and disapproval.

Six weeks later I turned down a tab of acid; I might have got the Infant of Prague, the horrible little bugger.
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Wed 20 Oct 2010, 12:11, closed)

Such controversy!
Your basic point is perfectly valid - some people aren't the "settle down and make the babies" type - but I think its the rather sweeping generalisation that EVERYONE feels this way at least secretly that has caused such a big kerfuffle!

I'm in my early twenties and am getting married next year. Children can't be too far behind. But would I give up my fiance for the off chance of some random encounter down the pub of a Friday night...or so I could go and windsurf down Mount Everest? Would I buggery!

And despite your efforts to backpeddle now, even going as far as to make a counter-post with the opposite argument, its obvious in the way that an elephant in the sugar bowl is obvious that you are trying to "win" at this argument as much as you are allegedly trying to "win" at life.

Also, if you're not adverse to making things up on b3ta (deceiving us poor defenseless readers - shame on you!) then why should we believe anything you've said? Spain? Single? Could just as easily be (evidently unhappily) married with two underachieving kids in barmy Birmingham really, couldn't it?

Congrats on all the ire you've generated though...
(ThinkOfEngland, Wed 20 Oct 2010, 9:12, closed)