Lifeguarding
I used to work as a lifeguard in a water park in torbay - there's only one, so you'll know which.

Endlessly saying 'go ... go... go...no you can't jump off the devils drop...go...' in the blazing heat of the sun on a steel tower with no shade does funny things to your mind.

So...

A sign on the footbath saying it was actually a special 'gofaster wax' imported from the US, and if you coated your whole body in it you'd go down the slides faster.

Standing in the slide first thing in the morning before the water came on, and then running away from it like some kind of tsunami.

Rolling pennies down non-working slides to see how far they'd go.

Sending partially melted Mars bars down the slide so the lifeguard at the bottom would think it was a turd.

'Forgetting' to tell attractively-large breasted women in bikinis to cross their arms on the fast slides, so they'd be topless by the time they got to the bottom.

Standing strategically to the side of the launch ramp, where you could see straight down a bikini top, and not saying 'go' for as long as possible.

If asked to look after someones camera, immediatly take a pic of someones arse as soon as they go down a slide.

Go down slides in rubber dinghys like a toboggan crew...

It was all fun and games until someone died.
No really, they died. Heart attack on the slide, lost conciousness, and was dead by the time they got to the bottom.

Still, we got to go home early that day.
(inflateable, Wed 14 Jan 2009, 18:39, 5 replies)

devils drop...
oh I miss that place.. it was heaven as a little kid... I don't think I would go off it today, but back then - early 90's I would virtually jump off it, not listening probably to you!

I once cracked my head so hard on one of the pool edges in the middle of one of the longer slides, that I couldn't see - so went and had an hour long shower... no one came to my aids...
(feedingtimeatthezoo day 1 of his bikini diet started, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 0:02, closed)

+1 on
missing that place...

havent been back in years :(


great ideas for keeping yourself entertained thru the dull "go..... go..... go....." days
Particularly love the "mars-bar-turd" :)

hahaha
(Hosey^, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 8:35, closed)

Raped by Mr Cowabunga.. I remember...
Going down the Howabunga Cowabunga at Typhoon Lagoon in Florida... Which I'd imagine is a similar kind of drop slide.

Being a scared little scrawny piece of shit while sliding down I just couldn't take the G's man, and instinctively opened my legs as some kind of defence mechanism..

This resulted in some kind of anal power wash that removed most of the turd in my lower intestines. Luckily the frothy water at the bottom concealed the escaped brown arse-broth and I was able to escape to the toilets to wash and cry.

Wash.


And Cry....
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 9:01, closed)

I'm clicking I like this
even though it won't do anything!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:21, closed)

Appreciated
I've been wasting time at work checking back in vain to see if anyone enjoyed my gut-wrenching (literally heehee) story about being raped by a flume as a child but alas I fear it's too late in the day..
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 15 Jan 2009, 10:42, closed)