The Worst Journey in the WorldAspley Cherry Garrard was the youngest member of the Scott Polar Expedition when he and two others lost their tent to the winds of a night-time snowstorm. They spent hours in temperatures below -70°F stumbling about the ice floes hoping they'd bump into it as it was their only hope of survival.
OK, so that was bad, but we reckon you've had worse. We know how hard you lot are.
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chthonic, Thu 7 Sep 2006, 12:40)
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N.I.R.A goodly few years back, I board the Northern Ireland Railways train from a certain town in mid Antrim to the north coast, to attend a beach party. This was during the north west 200, a large motorcycle race taking place on public roads. Now this race attracts 3 types of people:
1)bike nuts
2)families with kids and
3)every drunk arsehole in a 200 miles radius.
Since that just about covers just about everyone in the entire county, the trains were VERY full. The guards really has just given up, no one was looking at tickets, they had barricaded themselves into the drivers compartment. Empty cans were flying everywhere, fags being stubbed out on seats, people writing on walls - total chaos. So I'm on the train, alone, looking like a likely target for drunken yobs with my long hair and 'god, don’t hurt me' expression. How I managed to avoid getting bottled in the face I don't know.
Eventually, I reached my stop. In a flash, I leap up to the door. I'm the only person getting off at this hole-in-the-hedge station. I try to open the door (interlude - NIR trains are old. To open the door, you have to open the window, lean out and twist the handle on the outside) except someone had smashed the window, somehow resulting in the door being jammed shut. Then the train starts pulling away. I can't get out. eeek!
The ramshackle train is gathering momentum quickly, and soon it will be moving too fast to do anything about it. Right, drastic measures, and I fling myself out of the smashed window before it reaches the end of the platform, land and bounce a bit, all to a mighty "YARRRRRRR!!GOOOO OOONNNNN!!!!" and clapping from the drunks on the train. And I walk coolly off the platform, looking for all the world like I jump from moving trains all the time. When the train is out of sight, I stagger, clutch my knees, and begin to sob a little, as I’ve just royally shagged them up. So much so then they still twinge sometimes now, 7 years later.
Jumping from moving trains is very, very silly.
(, Mon 11 Sep 2006, 0:21, Reply)
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