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This is a question Worst Person for the Job

In a week where it emerges that the new Health Secretary is a fan of the hocus-pocus that is homeopathy, tell us about people who are spectacularly out of their depth in a job. Have you ever found yourself wallowing in your own incompetence? Tell us. (Note: "Name of football manager/politician - nuff said" does not constitute an answer)

(, Thu 6 Sep 2012, 12:48)
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Mallow
I used to work in a confectionary factory – to earn a bit of cash out of Uni. This place made lots of things, doughnuts, cake toppings Fudge (yes, I know, fudge packer haw haw) and Marshmallow

For those of you not in the know, Marshmallow is made by heating was is essentially sugar and water, then aerating it. It goes from clear glucose syrup to white frothy gloop – this resembled PVA glue.. Which at the time of packing, is still very hot and tacky – so needs to be left to cool down.

I was taught how to use the machine that produced this frothy gloop in the best part of 3 mins, it was that easy. The golden rule was don’t stop the machine once its pumping out the Mallow. One batch will take about 90 mins to run, which – once you’ve done you can have a long break. It was a fairly easy job. 3-4 tons of Mallow was made in a Batch.

I had worked on this machine for a week, before some bright spark thought a rotation was in order – so I could get more experience on another line. In my place they put new lad. Again he was taught the rules, don’t stop the machine.. what ever you do… work through all your breaks and take a long one at the end.


3 hrs later I was sitting in the canteen when I heard a loud bang - 3 guys then walked past resembling the ending of ghostbusters.
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 12:23, closed)

What did he do? Cross the streams?
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:03, closed)
I officelolled.

(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:10, closed)
ray, if someone asks if youre a god
YOU SAY YES
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:16, closed)
I, too, enjoyed this post.

(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:31, closed)
Where do these stairs go?
They go up
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:34, closed)
We came we saw
WE KICKED ITS ASS

which reminds me - i really need to watch that movie song again.
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:48, closed)
^This
Your post has also been clicked. That is all.
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 13:50, closed)
This story complains no complaints about mods, trolls, me or people from /talk.
This is clearly trolling and an abuse of this forum. MODS!
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 15:31, closed)
How dare you post an amusing anecdote on a forum for whining and droning!
You terrible trollbully!
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 18:07, closed)
No trip to the burns unit?
They missed that bit in Ghostbusters, too.
(, Tue 11 Sep 2012, 18:42, closed)
i can only assume
they slop that landed on them had cooled by that point.
i remember going in to have a look at the room where the explosion happened. The roof was about 50ft up (typical factory floor) it was dripping from the ceiling windows and drooping off the walls. it had flown a considerable distance. perhaps these guys where a few feet away from the mess when it went off.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 0:04, closed)
Awwww man.
You've ruined it now by essentially admitting that you made the whole thing up. You daft twat.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 8:04, closed)
Made the whole thing up?
how did you come to that conclusion? The above from me was just extra detail. I can draw you a picture if you like?
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 9:52, closed)
You should.
We're all pretty thick, here. I don't doubt your story, btw.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 15:53, closed)
But the detail isn't convincing.
You should have stuck with the original story. It's obviously second hand but at least it was almost believable.

Sad times.
(, Wed 12 Sep 2012, 18:38, closed)

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