My dad told me to never ever open the cellar door.
I did once and saw daylight for the first time.
( Captn Hood-Butter doesn't know what he wants to be when he grows up., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:34, archived)

That was pretty much my joke right there.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:35, archived)

My dad told me never to open the cellar door.
I did one day and he was waiting outside with a pointy stick and he took my eye out and that.
( baldmonkey LEMSIP AND VIENNESE WHIRLS ALL ROUND., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:37, archived)

Is that before or after he put the stick up your bumhole?

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:38, archived)

My dad told me never to open the cellar and when I did all the salt fell out and that lol.

( baldmonkey LEMSIP AND VIENNESE WHIRLS ALL ROUND., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:40, archived)

My dad told me never to open the cellar and when I did all his insides fell out because he was a big issue seller and cellar and seller are homophones

( GluEid Saeed, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:41, archived)

MY DADA TOLD ME to not open the cellar and when i did nothing happened and then i realised he meant don't open the celery but he had died of a stroke before he could finish saying celery.

( baldmonkey LEMSIP AND VIENNESE WHIRLS ALL ROUND., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:43, archived)

My dad told me never to open the cellar so I didn't

( GluEid Saeed, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:44, archived)

I was kept in a cellar and my dad said not to leave but then I did.

( baldmonkey LEMSIP AND VIENNESE WHIRLS ALL ROUND., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:45, archived)

My dad was a cellar and I kicked in his door

( GluEid Saeed, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:47, archived)

I dadn't know that.

( baldmonkey LEMSIP AND VIENNESE WHIRLS ALL ROUND., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:49, archived)

don't open me

( GluEid Saeed, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:51, archived)

DAD CELLAR LEFT

(PsychoChomp Deleting posts, so you don't have to., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:47, archived)

My dad said don't open the celler but I did and there was
this black man in there and he was all like "Hello? is it me you're looking for?" and I was like "WTF" and threw a clay head at him and we both danced on the ceiling.
( Donkey Gums twitter.com/jetjacuzzi, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:49, archived)

I was trapped in this cellar right
and I was told not to go out,
but I disobeyed my parents with hilarious consequences
(PsychoChomp Deleting posts, so you don't have to., Thu 8 Jan 2009, 11:36, archived)