did Friz's baby appear in the end
or is it still trying to get out /fatfacejokeyes
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:48, archived)

haha, yeah

( well, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:48, archived)

At the time he said it was on it's way, his twitter feed made no mention of child.
From this we've assumed that he was just lying and has never had sex.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:48, archived)

I say, we, I mean I.
But I'm very important.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:49, archived)

It was just pretending it wanted out.
He world was too cold and mean.
( agent binkybee, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:59, archived)

If Friz was my father I'd want to hide away from the world forever.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

Unfortunately, wherever in the world 'Son of Friz' ran away to, his father's face would always be visible on the horizon.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

This is funny

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:16, archived)

I'm so glad you're taking the time to arbitrate on every joke on here now.
It really helps everyone else as an instant reference tool.
( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:26, archived)

Someone should keep a tally of who made Friz jokes and his reaction to them
Then we can have a 'Made Friz Laugh Most' award at the end of the month.

There could be a tombola and bingo. We could make a day of it
( Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:27, archived)

why the christ would someone update it on their twitter
i mean okay fine he posted a very quick message here but still
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

This is Friz.
Attention. Friz.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:01, archived)

When you're mature enough to start having children instead of dating them, you'll understand

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:02, archived)

haha, you're doing what one of my old managers did when he had a kid.
Previously an immature cunt, then suddenly one day, "oh you are SO immature" to everyone else.

CUNT.

:-p
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:04, archived)

pfft, you cunt

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:04, archived)

Noit dates children?

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:05, archived)

I was confusing him with Reid
Whatever happened to Reid?
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:05, archived)

Nonce jail.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

Excellent

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

Dunno, he just got a bit mental and then faded away.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

I had to go out with you to get the averages up.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

I like the "had to" bit
Was it part of your parole conditions?
(bogus official jejus was born in a stable but he wossant A horse, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

I'm a well respected tool of the British Justice system.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:08, archived)

That's a beautiful euphemism.
I'm not sure what for, maybe massive slag, I just don't know.
(bogus official jejus was born in a stable but he wossant A horse, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:11, archived)

I barely slag at all these days, it's scabbing over again.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

Surely you can find a randy farmer with string for a belt and a tooth left to prod you one up?

(bogus official jejus was born in a stable but he wossant A horse, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:13, archived)

You're the most maturest person I know.
Because maturity is a requirement for accidental children.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:05, archived)

I got pregnant by turning the bath into a lava lamp

( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

Apologies. Short fuse at the moment.
Lack of sleep. Namecalling. Bah.

I think I had the right idea yesterday to avoid /talk for the meanwhile
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

Try curry or sex or picking her up and squeezing her

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:08, archived)

I'm not losing my virginity to a pregnant woman

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:09, archived)

OH NO WAIT I MEAN-
Fuck
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:09, archived)

RUMBLED

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:09, archived)

SO HAS THE POOR LITTLE FUCKER BEEN BLURTED OUT INTO THE WORLD OR WHAT?

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:15, archived)

NOT YET RR
FALSE ALARM DEAR, KEEP UP
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:16, archived)

PARDON? HAVE ME VISITORS BEEN YET?

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:25, archived)

Oxytocin.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:09, archived)

It's OK, I'm sure you'll take advantage of me when I'm vulnerable one day.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:08, archived)

You never wake up when I'm doing it.
Either you're drunk enough, or I'm Pistonesque in the bedroom.
( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:14, archived)

Haha, anywhere but here 'pistonesque in the bedroom' would be considered quite the compliment.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:16, archived)

I have some supermodels in my room already!*
*socks on the floor
( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:17, archived)

Phwoooar, look at the stitching on that one

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:18, archived)

The only way you and everyone else can be 100% sure you're going to avoid talk is if you died.
So you should just do that.
( mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:15, archived)

Woah. Do you have some sort of beef with me?
This is the first I've heard of it.
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:18, archived)

He's not been the same since Gilgamesh left.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:20, archived)

i can't stand you, i do think you are a cunt and would like very much for you to die

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:26, archived)

It's harsh,
but a fair assessment.
( Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:25, archived)

haha

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

ZING

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

pretty monumental milestone in someone's life
i fail to see the issue with him mentioning it, no matter how often he has
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

I don't have an issue with it.
I'm just pointing out, you know. Attention. Friz.
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

Ooh that was a big piss, oh no! WATER BROKEN! #babyhere
Contractions ahoy! #babyhere
10cm dilated! Here we go! #babyhere
CROWNING! OH THERE'S CROWNING! #babyhere
THIS IS YOUR FAULT YOU FUCK #babyhere
( Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

WE SHOULD TOTALLY CYBER
tinychat.com/b3ta
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:50, archived)

False alarm. They happen.

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:50, archived)

When is she actually due?
Oh oh, did I show you photos of my new baby cousin? I've already made Lu's boobs spring forth with milk spontaneously.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:54, archived)

No you haven't
and she was due a few days ago I think.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:54, archived)

Here's one of Kaiser, look how big he's got:
photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs072.snc3/13935_204594065294_531590294_4512960_4554355_n.jpg
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:56, archived)

Dawwwwww

( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

And mine!
She's GORGEOUS!
( Mrs. Sp@m, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:55, archived)

She's dotey. We got her a stripey hat and mittens today, her little hands are always cold.
Couldn't get tights for newborns anywhere, though.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:58, archived)

I am sure they do these in newborn
www.babylegs.com/

Not quite socks, not quite tights.

The boys have a few pairs to wear with their wellies as they are good for putting over the top of the wellies and the trousers and holding it all in place.
( Mrs. Sp@m, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

Cool, we were hoping to see some in town. I must show them to mam.
She has lots of babygros anyway. My sister got some lovely little dresses, so she just needs something under them. Could stick them over a white babygro.
Edit: They're footless, she needs her feet covered. They're lovely, though.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:04, archived)

She was due Saturday
This is the second false alarm in as many weeks. It's all a bit touch and go right now
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:55, archived)

Dee had a few of those aswell. She was 11 days over in the end. Poor Dee.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:56, archived)

I blame the postal strikes

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:57, archived)

Get your plunger out, like a good man,

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:58, archived)

or the rubber arm gauntlets you see when they pull the insides of cows out
bit of vaseline, job's a goodun, £50+VAT
( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:04, archived)

We had some of those in work, for parvo cases etc.
I'll have a go, sure. It can't be that hard.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

Douse one of them in tobasco and play home-delivery-russian-roulette-with-your-wife's-foof

( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

throw her down the stairs
i am reliably informed this is a pregnancy helper
(Dr. Geoff Honkington woof, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

Do you think it was really his face that was pregnant?
After his son is born, he shall have a regular face again.
( SuperMatt, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:51, archived)

And he shall vomit forth babies
like a plague of screaming red frogs with carroty bits.
(tacpprm has a mmrpcat, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:52, archived)

He's sucked off enough blokes, all it needs is his face to start ovulating and it's a given.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:53, archived)

It popped its head out for a while
caught one glimpse of Friz and shot back up like rat up a drainpipe.
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:54, archived)

See, this? This is actually funny

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:56, archived)

Why? Did that actually happen then?

( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 16:59, archived)

There is humour in truth
But, not this time. Fella just didn't want to arrive yet.
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:01, archived)

I've been there mate.
My daughter was two weeks late and popped out at 9lb 10oz or the metric equivilant. Good luck anyway.
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:06, archived)

Oh, is it a boy?

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:07, archived)

Yes. Flynn. pretty sure I mentioned this.

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:08, archived)

Gah, Flynn is a surname.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:09, archived)

So is "Maggie"
If someone was called "Mr Maggie"
(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:11, archived)

haha, totally calling esme "Mr Magoo" now.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

Cool.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:13, archived)

nndd
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:10, archived)

Flith? like Felithity?
There was a Felithity at my old work, I wanted to stove her head in with half a brick in a sock.
( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:11, archived)

Flynn Frizzle?
Double F Double N Double Z?
( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:10, archived)

Yeah but he totally won't get bullied at school!

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:11, archived)

Are you naming him after the famous actor Errol?
In the slight hope that women will think his dad has a big cock?
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

After Neil Flynn

(__, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:13, archived)

Here's a photo of it.
( Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

Was SickRik the mother?

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:00, archived)

SickRik donated his sperm once.
The child grew up and began to talk in a foreign language.
It was Satsuma.
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:02, archived)

It'd be like when you turned the colour and contrast dials on your old telly up to the max
everyone was a terrifying shade of SickRik
( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:05, archived)

I heard his mum was in the Sally Army.
Apparantly she was seen going from pub to pub banging a tangerine.
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:10, archived)

I'm glad I am the only one in the office as that's made me howl laughing

( moohalaa, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:12, archived)

His dad was a singer you know.
He was often heard wandering around the toilets he cleaned singing, "Oh my darling Oh my darling Oh my darling..."
All together now...
( Captn Hood-Butter It's a business doing pleasure with you on, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:17, archived)

It's like someone has autoleveled his face in photoshop

( magnum, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:23, archived)

BEHOLD... SON OF SICKRIK!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZiZBMs9hD-I
( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:29, archived)

He never done it.

(tacpprm has a mmrpcat, Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:03, archived)

See, I'm all for the ribbing of a b3tan.
It's good fun as long as they have a decent sense of humour and can take it. What I can't understand is...
When did having a laugh at Friz devolve into calling his unborn kid and saying we hope it's stillborn?
Say what you want about the man but not the kid. I think it's all a bit tasteless and appalling really. There were those that made the odd comment when Tegan was due but nothing like this, it seems to be about most of the board.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints., Tue 10 Nov 2009, 17:34, archived)