I heard you like eggs The LOVELY Bee Emm.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-17152413
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 19:44, archived)

www.surreycomet.co.uk/news/sutton/9535124.Faberge_egg_stolen_from_Worcester_Park/
( magnum, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 19:52, archived)

Now, i'm not suggesting baldmonkey took that egg
But they found some cat leg prints in the sand under the window, and a trail of piss weak waki all the way up the drive
( magnum, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 19:58, archived)

Conclusive evidence right there The LOVELY Magnum.
I bet he was going to clone it.
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 20:37, archived)

what a hideous piece of tat

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 19:59, archived)

Christ, you're not wrong.
Looks like something you'd order off the back page of the Radio Times. Put it next to your Swarovski crystal teddy-bears and Princess Di plates.
( Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:27, archived)

"She said the egg is made from the same oak as the 18th century Shtandart ship, the first vessel of the Russian Baltic fleet , which was made with oak planted by Alexander the Great."

Seriously. Fuck off.
( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:40, archived)

Can you prove it wasn't?

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:43, archived)

I'm not doubting it.
I'm just telling it to fuck off. It's like some kind of parody of a valuable antique.
( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:44, archived)

WHY aren't you doubting it?
I mean there's documentary evidence that The New Forest was planted by Robin Hood or something, but Alexander The Great was before writing was invented and people were still living in caves and that, so how would anyone know?
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:47, archived)

Because I don't care enough.
All I care about is that it reads like something Charlie Brooker might have made up for "Antiques Go Home," had he decided to write such a thing.
( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:48, archived)

This makes you a TERRIBLE PHILLISTINE dontchaknow.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:51, archived)

Philistine

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:11, archived)

Pedantine

( vladimir, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:12, archived)

Elephantine

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:15, archived)

Phyllistein.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:34, archived)

Why does anyone care about a single part of that?
Why is it important in any way?
( BraynDedd CHEER THE FUCK UP YOU MOANING TWATS, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:32, archived)

Because our own disgusting little furry Spangles took it of course.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:35, archived)

haha
that's 5 minutes from me.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 20:56, archived)

And thus Spangolin The Borrower reveals her GUILT.
'Ning The LOVELY Tiny Spangles.
*Panders*
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:44, archived)

just what the world needs, more babies

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 19:53, archived)

Yeah, but see, what I was thinking is that now they've got the SCIENCE to do that we could reverse-engineer it to have a NEVER ENDING SUPPLY of chicken eggs.
:D
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 20:01, archived)

Or better still, EASTER EGGS.
Imagine THAT The LOVELY Emm Gee Tee.
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 20:07, archived)