Because I don't care enough.
All I care about is that it reads like something Charlie Brooker might have made up for "Antiques Go Home," had he decided to write such a thing.
( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:48, archived)

This makes you a TERRIBLE PHILLISTINE dontchaknow.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 21:51, archived)

Philistine

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:11, archived)

Pedantine

( vladimir, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:12, archived)

Elephantine

( Moon Girl Technologies don't take my word for anything, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:15, archived)

Phyllistein.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sun 26 Feb 2012, 22:34, archived)