bored of that now
the zombie hoard of comics book world of warcraft lego twighlight harry potter jedis are hoarding at your house because you realise that all those things are utter shit

point to your right, that is your sheild duke, point to your left that is your weapon my lord

how fucked are you

patio door and a washing basket here, bring it
( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:35, archived)

A film crew and ur mum.
lulz.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:38, archived)

now that zing burns

 ▲
▲ ▲

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:39, archived)

It's almost time for somebody to come on here all drunk and cyber punchy.
It'll be forgotten by around 11:15pm.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:41, archived)

dont tend to happen anymore, only people who dont care left jmg, and when we pretend to be upset nobody cares, etc etc

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:45, archived)

you know what jmg, i'm drinking a dog now, true fax

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:19, archived)

Monitor for a shield, clipboard for a weapon.
I'm going to be ok, they'll be too fat to get in through the door and climb the two flights of stairs to get to my office.
:D
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:41, archived)

take you clothes off stuj, oil yourself up, go down there and get it messy

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:43, archived)

Or I could just put my Hi-Viz vest on, take the clipboard and stand at the door saying "No trainers, no T-shirts."

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:45, archived)

would you not rather destroy stuj? i'm proper getting worried here

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:46, archived)

I don't know anymore mongy, I had a very disturbing dream about a Ginge girl today.
:(
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:47, archived)

Oh FFS
just fuck an orang-outan and get it out of your system.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:18, archived)

I'd take a orang-utan over a tango any day Wynoh.

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:29, archived)

Ginger penguin?

( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:49, archived)

:(

( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:56, archived)

An upside down footstool as a shield and a can of deodorant as a weapon. I could see this working.

( Mu Dinofiddler, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:41, archived)

they wont like the deodorant

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:43, archived)

If I could grab a lighter on the way I'll sterilise the fuckers one by one.

( Mu Dinofiddler, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:51, archived)

Costco membership card, and a sleeping Cocker Spaniel.
bugger
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:49, archived)

i hate dogs, you'd put me off

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:59, archived)

you should never break your rhythm for a lady
or a slender chap with eyeliner on.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:09, archived)

shield: pliers
weapon: brass guitar slide
( mictoboy page 4, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:55, archived)

this form of data collection is much more favourable to facebook likes

( mictoboy page 4, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 22:56, archived)

i'm waiting for some cunt to say they have a fabege egg or some shit and i'm robbing them

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:00, archived)

the pillow was covering the priceless artefacts.
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:16, archived)

hey, you should tell me you address incase this ever does really happen

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:20, archived)

sure thing mongy, it's
wait. Hang on a second...

If someone were to rob me you wouldn't be able to get here in time to help.

Thanks anyway
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:22, archived)

'Scuse me
I just thought you should know, some fucking tosser's been using your account to post shit stories on QOTW.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:28, archived)

THE HORROR!!!

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:36, archived)

I can't describe it, Mongy.
It's like someone's retched up my worst nightmare in my face.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:48, archived)

oh shit, I'll flog them at once!
by the way, it was the manservant. He does like to get up to mischief.
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:55, archived)

heh.
Good answer. Your prose is too prolix.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:59, archived)

well bugger.

(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 1:00, archived)

A TV and a Pillow.
Looks like I'm buggered.
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:11, archived)

sure?
one is far too soft and flexible, the other... that's quite some anal stretching going on, even for a modest 14" screen...
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:12, archived)

22". I didn't say it was going to be easy.
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:17, archived)

no one ever said it was going to be easy
A pain to tease me, the barrier's broken
Climbing aboard on a white knuckle, ride
Churns my insides and the wheels are in motion


How slightly apt.
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:18, archived)

epidural on standby
It's going to be a rough ride.
(Chunty Cops my odometer reads, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:21, archived)

shield: my transgender dark dragonkin wolf costume
weapon: bad-dragon.com/products/dragontongue
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:13, archived)

i feel proper dirty for looking at that, and i have seen some rough porn and gore :(((((((((((((

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:15, archived)

bad dragon ftw.

( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:16, archived)

Hello spangolin.
/ac
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:27, archived)

Subwoofer and a bottle of red wine
fuck YEAH!
(Gazelle Wasn't here on, Fri 27 Apr 2012, 23:54, archived)

Hi
no idea who you are, but you're the most recent post.
How's things? Hope you're having a nice night.

edit: Fuck me, that's damned impressive lurking.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:00, archived)

alright

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:05, archived)

alright LftL mofo
I'm having a right shit one. What would you advise?
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:06, archived)

fuck it, keep your head down and do your time

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:07, archived)

Heard that
I'm working on it.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:15, archived)

www.b3mused.com/audios/535/alright.html
( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:21, archived)

thanks
thanks
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:24, archived)

i fucking hate dogs

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:36, archived)

THE AWESOME WYNOH!
How've you been chap?
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:08, archived)

Crap, mate.
Absolutely crap. The best I can say is that I'm currently helping other people fulfil their potential, which is good karma. You still around in the UK?
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:11, archived)

Yeah, way it's going I might get laid off before getting back South.
:/
( stuj BRING BACK BALDMONKEY YOU BALLBAGS!, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:30, archived)

shush up you pansies

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:44, archived)

Fucking shite
give them a big fat fuck off from me.
If you can find your way 30 miles south I'll buy you a pint.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:52, archived)

Hi
I was an active poster a long time ago, but life got in the way big-time-stylee. Unfortunately I don't get enough time to really participate but i still enjoy b3ta and all you mongs. (infact i'm fucking lucky to have internets right now...)
(Gazelle Wasn't here on, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:09, archived)

Well, good on you for coming back and joining in.
Nice to have you back for as long as you can manage it.
Pull up a person on QOTW for lying, shop a helicopter-eating shark, etc.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:12, archived)

[Mod edit]
Pull up a kitten, shop a leave, you'll never chair...
(Gazelle Wasn't here on, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:16, archived)

Prezackly.

( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:17, archived)

chair for a weapon and a smaller chair for a shield.
fuck it, I can have a sit-down AND put my feet up while I watch those cunts shamble up the stairs.
( mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:04, archived)

it is a piss poor hoard, i'll grant you that

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:07, archived)

Right up, mongy.
Right up.

edit: Fuck it, I've got a moral dilemma. I'm not hungry, but I fancy some fried chicken. Should I order some, or not?
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:05, archived)

late for foood, still what would i know

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:35, archived)

Right hand a point-and-shoot camera
Left hand a claw hammer.

Probably royally fucked.
( Lord Gnome, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:32, archived)

never fucked with a hammer, take your clothes off and smash em

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:34, archived)

Ain't taking my clothes off while there's a camera around
That shit just ends up getting posted to failblog.
( Lord Gnome, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:39, archived)

i dunno about that, just harder to grab skin aint it

( mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:47, archived)

Evening.
I've missed you.
( wynoh kills threads by his mere presence, Sat 28 Apr 2012, 0:47, archived)